need help with controlled crying!please!..

[pad]

I am currently trying out the cc method to help ds go to sleep on his own. I have managed on the fourth night to get him to sleep alone without too much fuss but what do i do when he keeps waking up throughout the night? do I go to him or leave him to cry?I am trying to get him out of our bed and not have him latched onto my breast all night!

What age is your son? I have done it for my two year old 6 months ago and it was horrific but worked one really dreadful night under my duvet to not go in and give her a bottle. Obviously left it too late compared to yourself. what about the research about dummies I heard on radio today!?! I know my friend at 3 months popped dummie into d/d mouth and she has slept through since. Some people all the luck in the world. I breast fed until 6mths d/d 1 and 4 mths with d/d2 . Good luck anyway and you have read the c/c book ofcourse about c/c?

Thanks for replying! He is 6 months. I tried a dummy ages ago when we were going through the endless crying stage but he was not interested!!I have read loads of books but they all seem to say different things.So did you just leave your child all night and they eventually went back to sleep?I am still only breastfeeding so I know I will have to give in at some point and feed him, although the HV says that he should get through the night now with no feed as he is over 16lbs.

best book i found on the cc method was Richard Ferber - have you read this one?

as for waking during the night, you should do EXACTLY the same as you do when you put him to bed for the night - so, go to him, calm him down, and leave the room for whatever length of time you are adhering to (we did 4 minute intervals)

I find though that later on in the evening he wakes himself up too much with the moaning and it takes ages to get him back to sleep. But I will just keep leaving him, he wakes up about every hour and I need it to stop!!It is so hard because you just don't know if you are doing the right thing.

i personally think 6 months is a bit early for cc.

but then ds is still in our bed at 14 months.

i think one of the key things is to make sure he has enough milk in the day first....there's probably a lot on here about cc....

We tried cc with dd at various stages from about 9 months and didnt work until recently. dd is now 13.5 months and the last couple of days have been so much easier than when we've tried it in the past. dd is not very active and so is much more tired at bedtime.

I've found that the bedtime routine is the key. If you make sure there is a definite pattern to bedtime, they get used to what is meant to happen.

Now, dd knows that after her bath and feed, its time to go to sleep. She's had a few months of getting used to the fact that when she is in her cot, she wont be taken out again and seems to just surrender to the fact that she might as well go to sleep .

I know its different for every baba so dont get yourself stressed out about it - if you get worked up about it then he will pick up on it and it will send out the wrong message.

I dont know if this is a conventional method but it works for us - I go into dd even if she is not crying, just to reassure her that we're still around - and for us that has worked! similarly, if i've only just left her room and she screams at the top of her lungs i wait a few minutes before going in - and then leave the same amount of time before going in again (whether she is crying or not).

sorry i meant dd is NOW very active!

i think at 6mths I would be incined to do whatever your baby needs. having said that i was letting my first baby sleep with me at that age, which not everyone agrees with. if baby needs comfort let him have it, there is plenty of time for cc later. maybe I am just too soft.
(my second was in her cot and sleeping through the night from 2 mths so have had 2 very dfferent children.)

my ds is 13m and still needs at least one feed in the night (and he's over 16lbs obviously). And is still sleeping in our bed!

I am a big softy though (and too weak-willed to do anything that interferes with my own sleep tbh).

I'd be reluctant to withhold food (i.e. bm) from a 6mo.

HI Pad, how did it go last night only checking messages now. THat was the name of the book Dr Ferber it was good and helped. I think 6mths is too young c/c but it is dreadfully difficult when all they want to do is latch on. You just feel like you never have a break. I sound 100 years old here. This so hands on time does not last forever have you tried expressing and letting d/p go in and feed them at night. Like the baby whisperer was always getting the non-breast-feeding person to settle them. If you have help it is worth a try have a bath with ear plugs in for half an hour as long as someone is settling baby or trying to get them down. worth a try. Good luck. let us know how it is going.

we are in exactly the same boat with our 10m old boy. he cries unless at the breast and when I say cry I should say scream the house down. Tonight we are going to go with the cc method as things are just getting worse. Should I put the baby in his travel cot in the living room so as not to disturb his elder brother aged 3.5 who has never had a sleep problem?
HELP!

Are they in the same room?

Yes, they share a room. Last night I put the elder one's mattress in our room which he loved and let tried c/c. In fact it worked quite well after 4 bouts of crying between 7.30 and 11 he only woke once at 1.30 for a feed and then when straight back to sleep until the morning...amazing! Beginners luck maybe?

My ds was heavy and, according to the books, shouldn't have needed night feeds after 6 months either. But he woke sometimes 2 or 3 time a night still until 8 months when I swopped his last evening feed for a bottle, this seemed to fill him up more.

He does need to learn to get back to sleep on his own once he has woken though. It's usual for children to wake 4 or 5 times a night, but they should go off again by themselves. I would leave him to cry, reassuring him every 10 minutes. After about 2 or 3 nights he should get the message.

Good luck for tonight it seems touch wood to be going well

thanks. last night was ok, he cried for about an hour between 12 and 1 but then settled fine until 6. The good thing I've noticed is that he's eating more in the day than before when he was at the breast most of the night. By the way when I suggested leaving him in the living room I live in a flat and my room is close by not upstairs... I'm not as harsh as all that!!!

Can anyone advise please. Tried cc with TJ at 7mths...it worked after three days (yipppee) , however, he did still wake at about 4 but would go back to sleep with a little back rubbing. He was recently ill and woke up lots and needed cuddles to calm him down, he as also found out that he can pull himself up in his cot. Now when he wake ups he stands up then falls over and bangs his head. Sld I pick him up, or just comfort him in his cot? Last night I left him and he got into such a state that I had to pick him up and cuddle him. What wld you do?