Is he testing us?

[debhawk]

Every evening, my ten-week old is given his bottle at 8pm and put down in his cot. Over the next half an hour, he'll 'shout out' (not really crying) 4 or 5 times. DH and I take turns going in and stroking his head a bit to calm him down then leaving and, after the fiftth-or-so time, he'll drop off to sleep.

He's a great sleeper - only wakes for one night feed (FF) - and goes straight back down after it.

The shouting out thing is no bother, but I'm in two minds about whether we are doing the right thing in going to him. Part of me thinks that I want him to be completely confident that we'll always be there the second he needs us, but part of me worries that he's just testing us - after all, there's nothing wrong when he shouts - and that he is learning that by crying out he can get whatever he wants ... does that make sense? I mean, what if he starts doing it for longer periods of time, or starts doing it after his night feed - things could get much more difficult for us.

Any thoughts?

He's too little to be "testing" you. If he's shouting in an "I need you" way, you need to go in to him. However if he is just shouting because he's found his voice and is testing out his new skill of making shouty noises (i.e. doesn't in any way want / need you and is quite happy), you might be creating a habit by rushing in. If you can't tell the difference I personally would err on the side of caution and go - he's still very tiny.

I think that at 10 weeks old, if he cries and you don't come, he will cry even more.

Because he is not a rational little being.

You are doing the right thing by comforting him when he cries.

Out of interest, what would happen if you didn't go in to him? Would the 'shouting out' turn into proper crying, or would he settle himself? Some babies do cry out when they are falling asleep.

But if he sounds distressed I would absolutely comfort him.

The thing is, I am sure you will find his sleep goes in cycles - you might think you have cracked it and a few months down the line he might start to wake again FOR NO DISCERNIBLE REASON AT ALL.

It isn't a test.

It's just a baby thing.

He hasn't been alive for very long.

He don't know much yet.

Babies start to be neurologically capable of this sort of thing when they hit the 65 and 76 weeks developmental leaps (15 and 17 months). So I'd agree with Merrylegs.

Some children do shout a bit between sleep cycles, some shout a bit and need help to get back off again.

No he is not testing you, he is only 10 weeks old. He wakes up and wonders why you are not there.

He wants comfort so give him a cuddle, milk or what ever is needed. Don't worry this is perfectly normal