It's just taken me 3.5 hours to get my 4 month old to sleep

[DorisDoesntDance]

and that's happening every night. He's only sleeping 3 hours max, then feeding (ebf), sleeping for 1/2 hours, waking, feeding etc.

I don't mind the night feeds as much, but 3 hours to sleep is killing me. I can't eat or cook, as it's impossible to leave him for more than a few minutes without him crying. he's also crying when he wakes in the night, which is new too and sad.

oh bloody hell, I'm shattered. help please!

sarah tricky! i really don't want to give him a bottle and i've certainly got enough milk, but i know so many people for whom that's worked. not sure he'd take it though, as he refuses dummies and my fingers etc.

i've just fed him back to sleep again and he's curled up on my lap. hope he doesn't wake en route back to his cot.

thanks for info re:weaning everyone. hadn't thought about how difficult it might be for him to digest.

Ahh I know, it's a toughie, and it's all personal choice. The other option is to just commit to the fact that you may need to spend some time feeding him in this way. Get support if you can to deal with cooking or getting take aways for a week, don't plan anything too demanding and settle in for the time being to focus on feeding & nurturing him. If you can then comfort him rather than feeding immediately to try and stretch the time between feeds he will be more inclined to take a larger feed rather than "snacking" and, therefore, (hopefully!) sleep longer. ALso, if he's not getting big feeds with a good gap between might be getting too much foremilk, associated with wind.

Sometimes the stress comes from feeling like the feeding/sleeping cycle is preventing you from getting on with other things - if you can let go of the other things and focus on him exclusively it may feel easier?

um, you might want to ask on the baby feeding section, but I don't think big feeds/big gaps are needed to avoid too much foremilk. the foremilk (the first bit) is increasingly watery with the time since last feed. so actually long gaps would be associated with increased foremilk. see kellymom

you could always join us on the "at 3am no one can hear you scream" thread for and sympathy :)

I wouldn't try to space out feeds either, as the more often he feeds the greater volume of milk he'll be getting.

If he's gone up the centiles then he doesn't sound starving to me - that is really good weight gain! And 25th centile isn't small either, a quarter of babies are smaller.

thanks both.

will be ready for the 3am whine

he finally went down at midnight, woke at 2am and soiled his nappy (v. unusual) and then slept til 7am, then cluster fed and slept from 8.30am til 10.30. he's eaten lots today and had a lunchtime nap for 45 mins and went down for an afternoon nap at 3.15pm - he's still asleep.

i think i'm going to try and start bedtime routine at 6.30pm with bath, massage, feed, dimmed lights etc.

been reading up on dairy intolerence today, which sounds possible, so will see if cutting back helps. will be a nightmare, as am vegetarian and use dairy for protein and calcium intake. off to raid recipe books!