controlled crying -- the rules please!

[lindster]

my ds is just over 6 months. he cant get to sleep on his own and also needs his bum patted till hes asleep (bad habit i know). just put him down awake and left him to cry for 5 mins. went back in, didnt pick him up but had to bum pat otherwise wouldnt stop crying. Are you allowed physical contact in controlled crying? i thought the baby had to be quiet b4 you leave the room again but dont know how to achieve this!

The way I did it was go in after 5 minutes, lay him back down, cover up but DON'T make eye contact. Leave for 10 minutes, repeat. Leave for 15 minutes, repeat etc. Leave it for 5 minutes longer each time.

GOOD LUCK with this, it's really hard but worth it if you succeed. My DS was over 1 when we did it, but I had tried before but he just wasn't having it!

Best of luck.

Does he wake at night? Does he go to sleep at a reasonable hour? If so, I think a bit of bum patting is nothing and I'd continue rather than have crying, but that is just my opinion.
And no, they don't have to stop crying before you leave the room.

hes getting better through the night since we introduced a dream feed a couple of weeks ago. i might try that pick up put down method to calm him then walk out. Just seems harsh if he starts crying again straight away! i really want to get out of the bum patting as hes never going to sleep without it otherwise, ill still be there doing it when hes 10 at this rate!

sorry what does IYSWIM stand for? probably me being thick! My friend made me feel bad about the bum patting because hers just go to sleep so thought i best change it. The thing is i still want to do the controlled crying so by bum patting im still not encouraging him to go to sleep alone.

if you see what i mean

well to be honest both dh and i are happy to pat his bum to sleep but when he cant back to sleep during the night i regret it. people make out its bad if they cant sleep on their own, i guess as a first time mum i dont want to make some huge mistake.

Hi you shouldnt really do controlled crying with a baby under a year old. The best thing is to treat day as day and night as night by doing the same thing day after day you should achieve a good routine. Once you put him down to sleep dont take him out of the room again maybe you are being too quiet my three month old has slept through the night since week five. try music and putting something in the cot that smells of you good luck

it was my hv who suggested the cc in the first place , she said 6 months is the time to do it. Im not going to bother with it now just see how it goes. Hes slept all night for two out of three nights now so not going to lose sleep over it!!