2.7yo and STILL not sleeping thru with any regularity, help!

[titferbrains]

Not sure whether it is time to get tough or just yet more "wait and see, it's just a phase".

DD has only ever slept thru occasionally, longest stretches would be for a few weeks, then she'd get a cold, or we'd go away etc etc.

Her napping is irregular atm but if she needs one it's for 40-45 min after lunch, probably at about 2 as the times I've put her straight down after eating recently she has played for at least 45 min before falling reluctantly asleep.

At night she is crying as soon as she wakes, and I try to wait for a minute to see if she is settling herself but generally it's just been escalating and I cannot bear the noise so I go in. I pick her up for about 10 seconds or less - I have a bad back due to pg - and then lay her down and say it's time to sleep, ask her if she needs anything, she rarely does, and then leave.

She almost always goes straight back to sleep. HOWEVER I take ages to fall asleep and get v cross in the meantime!

Last couple of nights she wakes up crying and then I go in and she speaks in an entirely normal calm voice - mummy, can I sleep in your bed? I say no firmly. Once on weds night she was up singing for a while.

When she's had a bad night she sleeps in to 8 or 8.15 latest.

I have tried to be calm and generally supportive because I know she can sleep thru and I hope that being mostly kind and reassuring will help her to realise that when she wakes up, she just needs to go to sleep again. But I am very very fed up of never knowing if she'll sleep thru.

Should I get tough and let her cry it out when she next wakes? She seems too old for this and I imagine she'll just get quite cross and shouty...

Her big bed is coming in a few weeks so I hope that being more comfortable and having more space will be a good thing, as it's entirely possible that she's waking due to hitting an arm or leg on the bed and is then confused on waking. Plan to do the "rush in and put her straight back into bed" repeatedly if she shows signs of playing about after lights out.

She is also going into a very deep sleep for naps and a bit difficult to wake, a bit grumpy just after. Are these signs of dropping nap that I've been desperately ignoring?

I realise many people have it worse than me, but please help and advise if you can!!

anyone?

It sounds as though she could be dreaming. She's the right age for it to start. Not sure it helps but my elder daughter aged 2.9 wakes too at random times of night. Sometimes at 11pm sometimes at 3am. I suspect the amount of nights she has slept in her own bed all night since the start of this year can be counted on one hand.

I go for the path of least resistance too. In my case if I or DH is not yet in bed we go and sit with her til she's calm again and asleep. If
it's in the early hours I pick her up and put her in our bed. She usually goes to fleep within 20 minutes and will then sleep til 6.30. Why do I put her in out bed? Because my younger daughter is 9 months old and I need to catch sleep where I can. I'm up twice each night to deal with her so I can't face a period if being up to resettle my elder daughter at 2am!

I figure I know she can sleep in her own bed. She's done it many times before but like you've said it gets disrupted when they're ill etc.

Each to their own I guess. Some of my friends are horrified by the fact that neither of my girls sleep all night. My Mum keeps telling me to enjoy the extra time in the middle of the night as it won't last forever. (I was a horror and didn't sleep through til I was 6!)

hello ladies, I am so glad to have dived a little deeper into mn and read this post, My son who is 3 in july has only ever slept through for no more than 10 times in his life, he to wakes either settles quickly or i take him into my bed, or crawl into his bed, tbh i think they will grow out of it eventually and he does go to sleep quite easily although i do sit with him until he drops off.

Maybe i have made a rod for my own back but each child is different, my eldest used to take a while to drop off sleep through but wake early. I myself only needed a couple of hours a sleep as a child, and my mum reminds on a regular basis that ds is nowhere near as bad as I was !!!!thanks mum :)

Goingmadtrying I reckon our Mums have been conspiring as that's what I keep being told too! Last night wasn't too bad. She woke at 1.30 and within minutes of getting into our bed was asleep and is still there ( now 6.30 am). Now if only DD2 wasn't waking so much I may get some sleep!

Am lucky that I have not really ever succeeded in having DD in our bed. We co-slept in early months but now she is talking she only ever wants to chat when she comes into our bed and is generally too noisy and wriggly. I always, always put her back down in her bed and rarely have to stay for more than a couple of minutes, unless she is unwell.

CBMUM I guess she is dreaming, but I want her to learn to fall back asleep without needing me!! if she is waking upset or confused by her dreams, then is it mean not to go in and leave her to cry in the hope that she'll learn to fall back asleep without needing me?