Help - 14 month old won't sleep during day

[livjackson]

This is the first time i've ever posted on Mumsnet.
I have a gorgeous but very lively 14 month old baby girl who sleeps pretty well during the night. We have a very strict night time routine of bath at 6.30pm followed by milk (bottle) and then a read of a book and then asleep by 7pm. She always cries for a little bit at first but after about 10 mins she will more often than not sleep pretty well until around 10.30/11pm when we go to bed, which is when the slightest bit of noise upstairs wakes her up. I let her cry herself back to sleep which normally takes about 10 mins (sometimes if she's woken up properly it can go on for an hour). She's a very light sleeper.... we even made a point of not being quiet around her when she was first born but to no avail this hasn't helped. I just wanted to outline our nighttime sleep as it is generally pretty ok. The day on the other hand is a whole other story. I have always been pretty keen on a routine so she always goes back to bed at around 9am after waking up at 7am. She can sometimes last until 10am. She really is very tired, she gets very irritable, rubbing her ears/eyes and is generally very tired. Then the sleep will only last for about 30 minutes. She wakes up crying instantly. She has never really woken up 'chilled out' talking to herself like a lot of other babies do. It's as if she wants me to go and get her immediately. Then we have lunch at 12noon and then another sleep at 1pm and then again at 3.30ish. The same thing will happen again with regards to the sleep lasting 30 mins and then again she'll wake up screaming. I have tried everything. I have tried going up to her room, not saying anything and giving her back her dummy and blankie and saying 'it's sleepy time' and then putting her back down and walking out. So as to try and stretch her out for another 30min block (at least) but it never works. She will stand up in her cot screaming for another 30mins or however long I leave her there for. We were forced to do 'controlled crying' with her at around 9-10 months as when we were putting her down at night she would just scream in her cot and I was going up to calm her down every 20 mins from about 7-11pm which as you can imagine was sending me insane. The controlled crying worked to an extent. As I mentioned before I feel like we've got the nighttime sleeping sort of worked out now but I just can't get her to have enough sleep during the day which results in her being grumpy, clingy and generally not as happy as she is when she's actually had sleep. I would love any advice or help anyone can give. I'm very open to any suggestion.
I should probably also note that I always try and put her down in her cot, apart from the rare occasion that we're out in which case she'll be relatively happy to sleep in her buggy. Again only for 30 mins though.

Also note that she's an extremely lively/active child. I don't know if this has anything to do with anything but just thought I should mention it.
Another thing is I really need to try and get this sleep this sorted as Ive just found out that I'm expecting number 2 in November and would really love to try and have things a little calmer in our house when the baby arrives.

Thanks in advance for all your help. And advice or suggestion is welcomed.
Cheers!

The 30 mins of sleep - is that her choice or do you wake her?

I have an 18mo who has never been a great daytime sleeper, he just doesn't seem to need it. From about a year he was down to one nap a day if I was lucky. In his case I think there are just far too many exciting things to be done than sleeping!

Are you really saying you're tied to the house most days btw? Because naps at 9, 1 and 3.30 in her cot doesn't sound like it gives you much time to be out and about. Ds2 always sleeps better (at night too) if he's had plenty of fresh air.

We're unlike you in that we've never been routine driven, I'm not sure if that helps. If he sleeps he sleeps, if he doesn't, well it's not the end of the world (though sometimes when he's clearly knackered and whining it seems like it..). Maybe try a break from the routine for a bit and take your cues from her a bit more - it could be she's moved on from sleeping at those times so your schedule needs a bit of adjusting. Also I've read that toddlers need only 10-14 hours sleep per 24 hours, including naps, and that dropping to one nap around a year old is pretty common.

The "wake up and whinge" thing I think is developmental. Ds2 woke crying from just about every sleep until a couple of months ago. Most times he wakes up now he's pretty chipper and cheerful, so fingers crossed she'll have grown out of that one soon.

Congrats on your pregnancy too!

My DD is an absolute livewire too.
She sleeps 8pm til 8am and approx an hour's sleep around midday - but usually have to be out walking with the buggy, or in the car for her to go down without fighting it. I try and roughly fir what we're doing within this pattern so she gets to have the sleep but now and again it doesn't happen and she sleeps later on, after lunch.

Now that she is walking, it's easier to nip down to the park in the afternoons, let her tear about freely and get some fresh air - this seems to wear her out for the evening!

3 naps in the day - even if they are short-ish, is a lot for over 1s I'd say.

Sorry, should have say my DD is 14mo too.

Thanks everyone for your help.