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Sleep

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Original poster

Night Weaning 23 week DD?

18 replies

Fishsticks · 15/04/2011 21:16

I know it sounds harsh but due to the circs below should I do it and how?

Due to a combination of sleep regression, teething, being to nosy to BF in the day and a couple of very long haul flights my DD has stopped sleeping through the night. Her sleep has always been fabulous and she slept 7-7 or 7-4 then fed and back to sleep until 8am from 12 weeks, it was lovely! . She started waking and I went with it but it has just got worse and worse. Due to having one, two or even 3 feeds in the night she is now not hungry in the day. She is still full on waking and then just snacks all day. I know she is terribly little still but should I stop the night feeds?

I have no problem feeding my baby when hungry in the night but it seems so counterproductive and exhausting. The last couple of evenings she has even woken around an hour after bedtime, I have managed to get her back to bed without feeding these times.

Am I terribly cruel to even consider it? How should I go about it? I was thinking of trying to resettle her without picking her up, then offering water if necessary, then feeding if she was still distressed after an hour.

Any advice would be appreciated

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Flisspaps · 15/04/2011 21:18

I'd feed in the night, and try to take away distractions when she BFs during the day.

Sleep patterns do change - you were very lucky to have a baby who slept so brilliantly at first, and it may be that she goes back to a similar pattern soon without you doing anything at all.

Original poster

Fishsticks · 15/04/2011 21:43

Yes I have been very lucky with both DC in the sleep department until now. I just don't know how long to let it get worse and therefore harder to fix IYSWIM. My other thought is to maybe stop BF as she is easier to feed with a bottle in the day, but I would rather carry on for a while yet. My main concern is that she is now actually consuming more milk at night than the day. Thanks for taking the time to reply

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Dreemagurl · 16/04/2011 08:21

My DD (24 weeks) is the same. Nosy little thing, hyper alert and doesn't want to feed during the day as there's far too much going on! She feeds a lot at night too and consequently isn't hungry at 7am. Have been thinking about night weaning too but have to say (fingers crossed I don't jinx this) the last 2 nights have been much better, only 2 - 3 night wakings as opposed to hourly the past few weeks..,
What's worked for me is:
During the day, every feed done in a quiet darkened room. Took a week out from baby groups etc to do this and it was a pita but worth it as by the end of the week she was definitely taking more.
I bf on demand but tried to make her go at least 3 hours between each feed so that she takes more.
at evening feed, top up with bottle of expressed. (were doing formula for this but I think it was upsetting her tummy)
Being a bit canny about timings at night - if she was fed at 12, she CAN'T be hungry at half one (usually ended up feeding her anyway after lots if crying BUT taking her off the breast after a short time. Rod for my own back? Probably...)

Does your DD self settle in the evenings? Do you have a bedtime routine? Dare I ask.... How are her daytime naps? (my DD is an
appalling napper but that's another thread...!)

I'm slightly of the opinion that they will self wean from night feeds
when ready - with a little guidance from us.

HTH and remember - this too shall pass :)

iskra · 16/04/2011 08:30

Isn't this the 4 month sleep regression?

www.askmoxie.org/2006/02/qa_what_are_sle.html

Original poster

Fishsticks · 16/04/2011 09:02

Ok, well last night after going to bed at 6.30pm (usually 7ish and she woke at 7.15pm)she woke again at 11pm and I tentatively decided to go for it as my son is away with Granny for a few days so wouldn't be disturbed.
I gave her some water in a bottle and as she was biting her fingers some neurofen. She still wasn't happy so I gave her a cuddle until she was calm and left the room. She wailed a bit on and off with big silences in between, then she started to sound distressed so I went back and reassured her offered nore water and stuck some Bonjella on her gums. She was asleep after 20mins from first noise! As I left the room she stopped, over the next hour there was the odd shreak but she was asleep.....and..... I woke her up at 8.25 this morning!!!!

To answer your questions: she self settles (but with a music box, so might gradually move this further and further away from cot). She used to go down smiling until a few weeks ago then it became screaming, I did a combo of picking up if she was really upset and leaving her to have a moan. She now protests for about 20 seconds when put to bed

Bed time routine good

naps were a nightmare until 4 months, now she settle in cot in day especially in the morning but they vary hugely in length and an afternoon one often still has to happen in pram.

I hope thus will make her sufficiently hungry to fill up today but am not naive to think it isn't a freaky fluke so will see what happens tonight. The thing is teething never seems to bother her that much in the day so not sure if it can be that in the night really.

Thanks for all the replies and advice and I will keep you posted about what will no doubt be a terrible night tonight

I have been trying to do the darkened room thing, but it is not always possible

Iskra thanks for the link, it is brilliant

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Dreemagurl · 16/04/2011 11:37

That's great fishsticks, hope it wasn't a fluke!

RitaMorgan · 16/04/2011 13:47

I went down to 2 nightfeeds at 5 months - didn't completely nightwean til 8 months though. Could have cut the last feed a little earlier I think, but not til ds was on 3 good solid meals a day.

Original poster

Fishsticks · 16/04/2011 18:42

Well, DD is in bed with a full tum and we shall see what transpires tonight. As she has rarely woken at night I have always immediately fed her, so I am just seeing if that is necessary really.

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Dreemagurl · 16/04/2011 19:11

Good luck! I might be brave and try the same...

Original poster

Fishsticks · 16/04/2011 20:17

nothing ventured nothing gained Dreemagurl! If it all goes wrong tonight my next plan is to offer a dreamfeed at 11pm then try not to feed until the morning. She woke up 40mins after bedtime again tonight but by the time I had got my hands out of the washing up and dried them and gone up stairs she had gone back to sleep by herself.

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Dreemagurl · 16/04/2011 21:07

Same here! Was hovering outside the nursery and was just about to go in when she quietened down and had put herself back to sleep :) Couldn't help feeling a bit proud! Hope your night is as good as if not better than last night :)

Original poster

Fishsticks · 17/04/2011 09:07

Good Morning, Thanks for the good wishes..... they worked! . She woke up at 1.30am and had neurofen, water and a cuddle and went straight back to sleep until 8.15am. I think maybe I have up until now confused 'feeding on demand' with 'shove my boob i her face if she whimpers' Now I need to figure out if she is teething or if I have a little Junkie on my hands. She has woken up with a crimson cheek for the last 2 mornings, which makes me think it is teething. How was your night Dreema?

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Dreemagurl · 18/04/2011 08:33

Hi Fishsticks, actually Sat night was pretty good - she self settled in the evening and went from 7-ish till 1.15 which is the longest stretch she's done in months! Tried to offer water but she was mortally offended by this and screamed until I fed her :( Then she went through till 5, repeat of before and then till 8! We actually had to wake her at 8 which is unheard of - usually she's raring to go from about 6.30! Last night not so great - I can't seem to get her down without feeding :( How was your night last night?

Original poster

Fishsticks · 18/04/2011 21:48

Hello I typed out a long reply this morning and didn't realise that I hadn't pressed post. Saturday sounds great, I hope it is a turning point for you guys . Maybe she does just need that extra milk in the night, they are still very little really as my mum keeps reminding me.

Last night was even better for me. DD cried out 40 mins after bedtime but literally for about 20 secs then I didn't hear from her until 4am. I was convinced she would need feeding by then but I did the cuddle, Neurofen and water thing and she chatted for a few mins after the Neurofen took hold then slept until 8.40 am! I am not sure if I should keep drugging her but she had the bright red cheek again and has been teethy and drooling all day so I guess it is warranted. Tonight she whimpered for 5 seconds an hour after bed ad I am keeping everything crossed for another good night.

Has you DD started solids yet?

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Original poster

Fishsticks · 19/04/2011 08:42

I am afraid to even type this as it will undoubtably jinx the whole thing. But... DD slept for 13hours 20mins last night [smile

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Dreemagurl · 19/04/2011 09:35

Wow that's brilliant! Well done you! Not a great night for us last night, took an hour to get her down but then she went through 8 till 2 (there was a whimper at half 12 but once I'd gone to the loo she'd gone quiet again!). Had a massive feed at 2 and I was hoping it would be enough to get her through but she was crying again at 5. I tried everything but she just screamed and screamed till I fed her and as I'd held out so long she then didn't want to go back to sleep after feeding! Groan.... Just when you think you've got it figured out! Can I ask something Fishsticks - when you give her water, how do you do it? Just from a bottle or spoon or what?
Hope your good sleeping continues, fingers crossed for you! :)

Dreemagurl · 19/04/2011 09:38

Oh and we're doing BLW so not having meals yet but having a bit of everything when I eat. And it's definitely going through judging by the nappies! Think she slept best when she'd had some chicken in the day... Is your DD eating yet?

Original poster

Fishsticks · 19/04/2011 21:10

She has has some veggies and fruit from my plate and a wee bit of mush, I am a bit wary of anything else as we have allergies in our family. She is desperate for bread though! DP told me today that DD is actually 22 rather than 23 weeks so I am in no real rush (she is). I offer her water in a bottle but she never takes much it is for my benefit rather than hers! I give her water in a free flow sippy cup thing when we eat and she will sip a bit that way as she is not expecting it to be milk IYSWIM.

8 til 2 is agood stretch really isn't it? and her crying out then going back to sleep shows she can settle herself. I always find that usually DD's first sleep is her longest and once she has woken then its every 2-3 hours. My DD was over 10lb at birth so her tummy has always taken a lot to fill up, but has stayed full for a while (I am still fat though, which isn't really fair) I am at my parents for a few days and she in a travel cot and teething wildly so I am expecting a relapse.

Best of luck for tonight- all these phases shall pass

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