our nights are a total mess and i can't see the light at the end of the tunnel

[sotough]

not sure there is any solution to our situation but am feeling desperate and just wanted to share/vent...
DD is 13 weeks old and we were in a decent sort of routine and making really good progress with nights until she was about nine weeks old and got bronchiolitis. prior to that she'd been going down at 7pm; waking for a feed around 11pm, and then going through till about 5am when she'd wake for another feed. gradually she was pushing on till 6am so things were looking good.
then she got ill and naturally it all went out of the window; and that was fine, because of course she needed lots of extra cuddles, feeds etc when she wasn't well.
However, she's been better for two/three weeks now, but our nights have become a disaster - we're basically back to how she was as a newborn. there is no longer any predictability to her waking/feeding times and i'm wondering if/when it will get any better. she does go down nicely at 7pm (self settling); we wake her at 11ish for a feed and she is usually ok till about 2am. from then on it's anyone's guess what will happen, but it's basically a constant cycle of very light sleep, followed by fussing, cluster feeding, crying, wanting the dummy, etc etc. it's pretty awful.
last night she had a great feed at 11pm (180ms) so i hoped she'd last a while; but she woke up before 2.30am hungry again. she had another big feed and i got her down again at about 3.30am. I thought she'd then settle till 7am, but she was up again at 6am, bright and raring to start the day - but not hungry at all.
am i expecting too much at this stage? everyone else i know with babies this age seems to be getting a long, decent stretch of sleep at night, whereas DD is now back to the sort of sleep pattern she had as a newborn. is there anything i can do or should i just accept it and go with the flow? i'm going back to work in a few weeks and am terrified she'll still be like this. for various reasons DH can't help during the nights though he does sometimes take her for an hour or so at 7am so i can try to catch up on some sleep. she is exclusively formula fed and is quite a small baby. any shared experiences/hope/advice or just a general 'pull yourself together' message gratefully received.

Ps just to add that DS, now 3.5, has always been a wonderful sleeper - so my expectations were perhaps artificially high...we've done exactly the same with DD as we did with DS (routine wise etc) but without good results in her case!

I dropped the dream feed at 12 weeks as I felt it was unsettling my DD, after that she would sleep through from 8pm - 4am/5am, have a feed and then go back to sleep again. With the dream feed she kept waking though the night.

interesting. anyone else tried this?

My DS is 14 weeks and used to wake at about 12 for a feed but he's dropped that now of his own accord and is sleeping 8-4 before needing a feed so I agree with grumbler that dropping the dreamfeed might help.

try this: www.calmerchildren.com/Baby_To_Sleep

Spacemansid! is this you?

I didn't even try to get a routine until my DS was 4-5 months. They're developing so much in the first few weeks that it was just a waste of time! Sounds like a growth spurt. It only lasts a few days. Go with the flow, try and nap when she naps if you can. My DS got his first tooth at 4 months, second one 2 weeks later and was showing signs of teething at 3 months so could be that.
Hope you had a better night, my DS decided that 5am was time to wake up so I feel your pain!!! (he's 7.5 months btw and he should no better!!)

:)

I would agree to stop the dreamfeed.