22 mth old wakes thru the night & only settles with milk from a bottle

[MimDiprose]

Please can I have some advise. DS2 is 22 months as yet the longest he has ever slept thru was till 5am, he would then have a full bottle of milk and go back to sleep till about 7am... which for me was fine BUT since Xmas he has taken to waking at 11pm, 2:30am and then 5am of which the only way I can settle him back to sleep is with another bottle of milk (I cringe as I type...) He goes to bed at 7pm with his bottle and then wakes at 7am but by the time morning comes I am knackered as am really struggling to get a proper nights sleep - let alone a complete one, and the more I worry the more het up I get.

I have tried swapping bottles of milk to bottles of water but he drinks with as much gusto - I am also now having to do a nappy change at the 2;30/3am bottle. This site is new to me so, excuse the long winded request but I would appreciate help form those that have worn the T-shirt and found a resolution.

Do I stop the bottles altogether - just swap to a drinking cup? How do I then settle him back to sleep - without getting him out for a cuddle. Needless to say I have tried the cup instead and he just kicked off & was worried he would wake DS1 - who is 10yrs.
ALso it's important to add that I am on my own so can't spread the no sleep load but that is irrelevant really, just a detail to help myself pasify my weakness & not wanting to upset him by taking the bottles away!
But seriously all advise would be warmly welcomed - please x

Poor you! I understand that wish not to upset the child. Does he fall asleep on the bottle in bed? Probably a good idea to give a bottle with a fastish teat in your arms after a story, then put to bed and sit next to. And he will cry I am sure. But will learn how to go to sleep without sucking a bottle. Sorry if this already happens.

As for the night, you could sit with a pat or just sit with. Or give a bottle of water. Maybe after a while he will stop wanting it? If he still wakes for the water after a few weeks then you could reduce it gradually.

I am all for doing these changes gradually. By 22 months his memory will be pretty good and you should expect changes to take longer than 3 nights.

My ds is 25 months and still asking to be stroked to sleep about 10 days later - he was ill.

Thanks that helps and gives me encouragement.

He does go to bed with his bottle & falls asleep drinking it, so I think that may be the first issue. I think I will try reducing the amounts as you suggest and then go to the patting perhaps when reducing the amounts is down to 0ml. What would you suggest in the ml reduction - one every day, every other etc?

Again thanks I am open to anything as my exhaustion is too much now as I lie awake and then worry about not getting to sleep - last night perfect example. Bed for me at 10pm, fall back to sleep after DS2 wakes at 11pm but after the 2:30pm waking, my mind is whizzing and my wind up machine starts - hence fell back to sleep at 6am, to which DS2 woke at 6:30am? :( but feeling more positive with a plan forming.

DD was like that at that age; she regularly had two or three bottles a night. Just before she was 2 I decided we would get some "big girl beakers". We chose them together and I decided to give it a try.

Amazingly her sleep improved within a few nights. She still woke but started to settle without needing milk. She didn't reliably sleep through until nearer 3 but the transformation was brilliant.

Well, we lived with this situation (night milk feeds from bottle) until very recently, when DD was about 2.4. She slept through the night no more than 4-5 times in a whole year. We thought that was just the way she was.

I'm afraid to say that it just got worse and worse and worse, and it was a vicious cycle. She ate badly during the day, filled up on milk at night, and woke repeatedly with a soaking wet nappy.

We broke the cycle at the new year, going cold turkey and offering her milk from a cup only. We had two days of hysterical crying at bedtime...and on day three she forgot about the milk at bedtime and slept through. It was such a relief!

We now rub her back to help her get to sleep instead, and also if she wakes in the night.

So, my advice would be to stop the milk/water feeds at night. We stopped abruptly, but our DD was older, so you may prefer to phase it in.

Good luck!

I think if I were you I would stick to a full bottle at bedtime but make sure he goes into to bed awake - keep a little light on while he drinks milk and make sure it's a faster teat.

I would do this so he is as relaxed and sleepy as possible.

Then sit and sing or pat or whatever until he goes to sleep.

Then maybe in the night you could give him milk that you water down over time til it is all water then reduce the amount.

I have played about with using different flow teats - I have had quite a few attempts at retraining as my ds has been quite ill quite a lot in his short life so have had to think about this all much more than is healthy!

I like bottles - I know they are not advised but in my view it is a breast substitute and that is fair enough for the first couple of years. If you never give it in his bed again he will learn not to expect it.

I would try and sort out the falling asleep without a bottle bit though as I do know a 4 year old who still wakes his mum for bottles in the night!

Hope that helps a bit.

And I would give the milk/ water at night with a fast teat. That way he won't fall asleep on it.

Or maybe just cut that nighttime bottle out?

Thank you all so much!
Lots of ideas to follow with & I think a positive step forward.
Mrs BloomingTroll - that is exactly where I am so advice gratefully received xx

Dycey thanks for that last bit. He does love his bottles! I think I will try and reduce milk volumes first & swap to water and reduce gradually and a fast swap to a cup if he continues to guzzle water like milk as my gut feeling is it doesn't matter what the contents are its the bottle comfort x

It probably is the bottle isn't it? But if it flows fast he will probably dislike it more. The slow teat is more like a dummy with a trickle of milk!

Very good luck!

Some people cut the ends off dummies to make them less sucky and soothing. You could cut a bigger hole in the bottle? Or would there be milk everywhere?

Falling asleep with the bottle is really bad for his teeth at this age too - try to rearrange the bedtime routine a but because his teeth need to be brushed after he's had his bottle.

Hi all,
Well I just wanted to touch base & share my update with you all! DS2 is now sleeping though the night from 7pm till 6:30am, no waking, no milk & no water!! Omg how amazing & needless to say without all you encouragement I couldn't have achieved this! Not to mention my best friends encouragement also!
I had 3 tricky nights & then he just stopped waking. I decided on the first night when he woke he could have a bottle but 3oz only & then I would tell him it was all gone- & yes I had tears & rage! For about 20mins!
Next night when he woke I told him he had drunk all the milk but could have a sip of water from his cup , which he took with a bit if fuss but prob had only a few sips & then fell asleep! Next night same thing but to assist settling him, I played him some lullabies of my mp3.
4th night - no waking, just sleep!
Bliss - so thank u all & to anyone else that finds themselves in my position, perserve be because hanging routines even at 22mths can still work xx

Great news- it's such a great feeling isn't it when you wake up and think "Oh my god, it's light. He slept through!!!! Yipppeeeeeee"

Oh that is brilliant! Well done you! And well done to your little boy too. He could have given you a much harder time!

Does he fall asleep on the bottle still? It's obviously fine if he does now he no longer expects milk at night.

WELL DONE!

thank you for posting this - just t he encouragement i need! 2 weeks ago I swapped bottle for cup buit am now going to cut the milk! I feel inspired by your sleeping boy!