Controlled Crying - anybody had success but it has taken a while?

[heylottie]

Hiya
DD, 17 months old. We did CC at about 9 months and it worked after 5 days. She slept through for about 4 weeks, then a combo of teething, illness, starting nursery meant that we fell back into our old ways: ie me getting up and soothing/feeding back to sleep.

Kept saying 'must stop doing this' but it never seemed to be a good time. But am getting more and more tired at work so something must be done

Soooooo - did CC again, started 10 nights ago. And unlike before, there is no sign of improvement.

I realise this is my fault really - I let her get so used to me coming in and getting her back to sleep that it is a really hard habit to break.

But DH is muttering 'this can't go on' as she wakes for the fifth time (no shit Sherlock, I am the one who has had broken nights for nearly a year and a half).

So my questions are:
has anyone had a similar situation where the CC works just as you were giving up hope?
and if, as DH says, this can't go on, what other options are there??

Off to work now (late, again) so will check back later. Thanks in advance!

no real answers here, but just to say we are in a similar situation, except that dd (16 months) had previously slept really well. We've been really strict with her for 2 weeks now and things haven't really improved, apart from the odd night.

What naps is your dd having in the day? Mine is having a really short one at about 10am followed by an hour and a half at about 1pm.

Hi benning
Thanks for your reply - dd goes to nursery four days a week and so only sleeps for about 45 mins there. But when she is at home, she will have a morning nap of an hour and a lunch time one of an hour. Sadly I have never found a link between naps and evening sleep. She is either overtired and doesnt sleep, or rested and doesnt sleep. Very annoying!
What to do what to do...

Is she actually waking in the night or is it just that she cries at bedtime? What time do you put her to bed?

She wakes in the night. She goes down at 7, and will wake up to five times or so. Sometimes cries for five minutes, sometimes for half an hour. But there is no pattern to it, and I don't think she is ill or anything. Room not too cold, not too hot. Hmmm. She then gets up from 530 onwards.

Good grief! You must be shattered! So at the minute are you just leaving her to cry and she sometimes cries for 5 minutes and sometimes cries for 30 mins, but then settles herself to sleep? Do you go to her at the minute? Does she stop crying sooner if you go to her? If she doesn't then I would be tempted to shut her door and your door so at least you get undisturbed sleep.
Obviously if you give her a cuddle/pat etc and she settles sooner then do that, but maybe try to give her 10 minutes to see if she settles herself and then try to lessen the contact e.g. if you usually cuddle, rock and sing, cut the singing, then the rocking, then the cuddle so you just pat and shush, then cut the pat and just shush.
I am by no means an expert, but that is what I'd do.

If it's not working, I'd say that what harecare says might work. DS is a similar age and has been having real trouble with his teeth (molars) and wind. Plus there's a developmental leap around 17/18 months where sleep goes a bit mad.

Also if she's having such little sleep at nursery plus the early starts (which it sounds like - 45 mins is not enough), then she could be getting pretty overtired hence waking at night. DS is knackered after his days with the nanny and he gets two naps!

Can you put her to bed half an hour earlier when you get home from work? Skip the bath just a quick clean, quick story, milk then bed? Also on her non nursery days, keep things really boring for her - so she can recharge after nursery. WIth DS we don't do much exciting stuff - park, family visit, shopping and pootle around the house.

Thanks so much for your responses. At the moment DH goes in and comforts her (doesn't pick up, just soothes and finds her best rabbit). Sometimes she will drop off again in a few mins, other times half an hour of furious crying.
I think overtiredness is the main problem. Nursery claim they try and put her down to sleep more but she just wont have it.
Last week I went into work late just so dd could have a nap before nursery, after waking at530. It's a vicious circle.
Thanks for advice - will try and put her down earlier. This will mean the DH will have to put her to bed as I dont get back from work til 645. Ah well, whatever works!

If shes crying furiously it's probably worth picking her up and giving a quick cuddle. It won't set bad habits - she migh have separation anxiety which will pass. DS goes through these phases - sometimes a cuddle is what he needs, other times he doesn't.

Definitely get DH to put her to bed, my 18 month DD is knackered by 6 and ready to go up to bed and after a play, bath and story she's fast asleep by 7pm and gets a good 2-3 hour nap from 1 til 3ish.