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Sleep

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Original poster

WHEN will she sleep through??

34 replies

hecklephone · 17/03/2011 20:55

DD2 has just turned one and has never slept through. We've been co-sleeping until about a month or so ago, when I decided enough was enough and began some sleep training, a bit of PUPD. So she improved a bit for about three weeks, during which she managed to sleep in her cot all night, although I was usually up to resettle her at least 3 or 4 times. However, it's literally one step forward and two steps back - in the past week or so we've returned to co-sleeping from about 1 or 2am onwards, as she gets to the point where she's just too difficult to resettle and I could be in her room for an hour or more, just trying to get her off to sleep again. Oh, and I've also gone back to giving her a bottle in the night too, in the hope that a full tummy might help - I don't know if it's making any difference and am a bit concerned that I'm forming another habit as she usually eats well and probably doesn't need a night feed.

I've been waiting since she was about 6 months old for her to turn a corner and begin self-settling or even just start sleeping alone for a bit longer but it's never happened! Weaning, walking, sleep training, turning one - nothing seems to be making a difference.

I don't know if I'm looking for advice or just reassurance that others have been in the same position and it's somehow got better?

Any experience/words of wisdom would be gratefully received!

OP posts:

leroymerlin · 30/03/2011 20:03

I know that every kid and parent is different but here's my experience and it made a massive difference.

My DD was a really really terrible sleeper until 22 months, we tried lots of different things but nothing seemed to work. Ten weeks before DS was due I knew I had to do something, as I feared I would go mad.

First I kept a sleep diary for a couple of weeks (sounds complicated but wasn't, I just wrote when she slept and woke on the calender). I thought I was being consistent but it showed that her bedtimes varied between 6 and 8 pm. Her day sleeps were also really erratic. However after a couple of weeks it was amazingly clear that she only slept 11 1/2 hours out of every 24. (She didn't really 'need' her day sleep).

Then for about two weeks I did a schedule and stuck to it fiercely. Dinner 5.30, Bath 6.00 Stories 6.30 put down to sleep 6.45.

Secondly I bought her a night clock that shows a moon until the sun comes up at wake up time.

Amazingly, the tears at bedtime stopped. The night wakings stopped as did the calls to get up at 5.30am.

I think that she was a) scared of the dark and b) being as inconsistent as I was.

She's been sleeping really well for about 7 months.....

ChishAndFips · 30/03/2011 20:07

DD1 did not sleep through until her younger sister arrived, at 18 months. It was like magic - we had tried everything to no avail, DD2 spends her first night in their shared room, and DD1 slept straight through, even with DD2 feeding etc!

Flisspaps · 30/03/2011 20:15

heckle DD still doesn't do all through, she's been a bloody nightmare to get down in the first place all week, needing a bottle and a bit and screaming hysterically. Then she wakes again at about 1/2 am and fights a bit- more whilst she has some more milk, then usually stays put until about am. We have tried stopping the bottle but it does not work. She will not sleep, and I am not prepared to sit there holding a screaming baby or doing PUPD until the sun comes up, as I need to be fit to work the next day nor will I leave her in the cot to cry.

Saturday however, she woke at about 11 and stayed up until 4am, screaming at DH the whole time and eventually falling asleep on him.

Eventually, they'll get it heckle. Just remember that Elizabeth Pantley says in her book that something like half of two year olds don't sleep through the night, but everyone thinks that THEIR child is the only one who isn't :) That's what I keep telling myself anyway!

Flisspaps · 30/03/2011 20:16

*stays put until about 6am

Original poster

hecklephone · 30/03/2011 20:25

Shushbaby those are the tactics I've been employing tonight! PUPD, no eye contact, keeping her down in the cot - it's going ok so far, fingers crossed. I've heard her cry out once or twice in the past half hour but she's not screaming the place down yet - that's a change!

chish I often wonder if she'd sleep better if she was in with DD1 (4yo) as she loves company, but then they might just keep each other awake for ages...It's not for right now I think, but we might have them sharing before too long, if we can re-arrange the rooms properly.

LBH I hope you've had another good night too - and yes, DD2 is a bit random also. I don't think she's ever had 2 days the same when it comes to naps or sleeping.

fliss I know what you mean - just starting this thread and knowing there are others in the same boat helps! I don't know why but I always seem to convince myself I'm the ONLY ONE - until I read stuff like this, so cheers guys for the solidarity!

OP posts:

Original poster

hecklephone · 31/03/2011 21:44

Aaaargh. I think i've spent 50% of this evening since 7pm sitting in the dark in dd2's room trying to get her to sleep but the longest she's managed is about half an hour. I can barely get one thing done, it's now nearly 1opm and I feel like the whole night is wasted. now i've just given up, she's asleep in my arms in the living room and i;m so fed up .

OP posts:

mamaesi · 31/03/2011 22:31

joining in as my 12 month old is not sleeping through... was brilliant as a tiny baby, just a feed and straight back to sleep... 0 - 6 months were great.

6-9 months were horrible.

night weaned at 8 months and then month 10 and 11 were amazing and I thought I cracked it.

now at 12 months she wakes at 2/3/4 am screaming and will just not settle. standing up protesting.... if i manage to settle her a little she somehow hears me leave the room and starts screaming again...

husband keeps bringng her in bed with us because he just wants to sleep.. but i worry that she will always want to cosleep as she understands so much more now..... what do you all think about cosleeping after one year old

PenguinArmy · 31/03/2011 22:51

just wanted to say that I started a dedicated support thread here for anyone who wants to jump on board

LittlebearH · 01/04/2011 08:25

Heckle Sounds awful, hope you are alright this morning. Before I tried CC I used to have to stroke DDs brow till she was fast asleep. Leave too soon and she would kick off. It was a nightmare especially in the small hours.

Mamaesi Co sleeping was fab for me when DD was little. I did it for my sanity and stress levels on afternoon naps until she was 10.5 months.
I find now if we co sleep , I a too much of a disctraction for her, she just fidgets with me and gets over tired.
Maybe some sleep training is in order? I have done CC (never thought I would or could - was desperate) and it was tough, but I started it on a Friday night with DP and prepared ourselves for handholding and little sleep ourselves. It did fix her sleep association but not her wake ups. I no longer have to spend 40 mins leaning over the cot stroking her to sleep after everytime she wakes.

See you on the other thread...... :)

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