3 month old DD will only go down to sleep at 11pm, how do I get her to sleep from 7pm onwards?

[bec23]

Hi,

I am a first time mum of a 3 and half month old DD, and so far things are fantastic apart from the sleeping.

Through out the day she feeds well, but usually catnaps on and off thought out the day, the only way to ensure she gets a good lunchtime nap is to leave her in her baby rocker, as every time I put her in cot she wakes after half and hour and won't go down again until she is in her rocker.

About 6.30pm I bath her and let her have a kick about and feed her about 7ish, then try and get her to go down in her cot, which so far she won't do and creates holey hell, until we end up resorting to bring her down stairs with us putting her in rocker where she sits wide a wake until I take her back to her cot about 11ish, give her a feed, after which she goes down with out fuss and then sleeps right through the night until about 7am.

I know that she is doing great and I am lucky because she will eventually go to sleep and then sleep through the night, but I am going back to work when she is 6 months and would like to get her sleep trained before this. Plus putting her down at 7 would enable me and my DH to spend time together and have our tea together which we haven?t done since she was born!

I am after any words or wisdom and advice which might be able to help me and my DD.

A greatfull first time mum.

hi... she sounds pretty much normal to me!
My ds was still going to bed at the same time as me until he was about 5 or 6 months... he has gradually moved his bedtime forward by himself in the last couple of months and now goes between half 6 and seven (he is now 8 months0
tbh, half hour naps during the day sounds fine too! If she is sleeping loads during the day (in particular her lunchtime nap) then this may explain why she is so wid3e awake in the evenings!

try letting her sleep when she wants to during the day, after feeds etc and then see how you go with the evenings!

My dd was exactly the same as this. We tried all sorts of things but nothing worked (sorry!) She just suddenly stopped doing it at about 4.5 - 5 months and went down fine at 7.00pm. Not long to go for you then!

Don't worry about going back to work yet: 3 months is a very long time for a baby.

Probably best to give up on 7pm for the time being, but maybe try bringing her bedtime (calling it 11pm) forward by half an hour or so a day?

hello bec23. i am also a first time mum, also with a three and a half month old dd! we were struggling with sleep too (i say 'were', but we probably still are!) until the last three heavenly days! we found that she was waking late (10-11.30 am) and going to sleep late (11pm) until the last few days when we started waking her up earlier (she is now up by 8am) and also sleeps earlier (by 8pm). for the first two days she slept through till 2am but last night she woke at 10pm, had a quick feed and then went straight back to sleep again. what time does your dd wake? also we have just started to put her in a gro bag (also last three days) and that seems to have helped too. my dd doesn't sleep great during the day tho (she'll have about two 30 min naps) maybe thats why she's started sleeping early, who knows! but ive got my fingers crossed this will continue. another thing that was suggested to me was cluster feeding from abt 7pm. might be worth a try? good luck to you!

Have you tried not letting her sleep at all after 4pm? Can be tricky to keep them awake at that age, but you could try gently blowing in her face if she starts to nod off.

Tbh both mine were about 3 months before they began to get into a routine, so I don't think you need to be too concerned at this stage.

Hi, my dd is now 9 months and still up till 10pm unfortunately. I'm first time mum too and have always just went with whatever suits her. She just gets really grumpy if try stop her from napping which just gets me upset so no point in forcing the issue. Sorry not much advice but think its just normal I'm afraid. Only thing you could possibly try is perhaps giving her the last feed slightly earlier which might help.

Bec, you say that your dd is napping throughout the day.

It might help if she was encouraged to have a little bit more structure - e.g. 2 or 3 longer sleeps every few hours, rather than catnapping all day.

Like a sleep, starting sometime between 10-11am.
And another mid afternoon - say around 2 or 3 pm.

You could gently try and prevent the catnaps by having more play, activity and then she might be reading for a longer sleep, rather than another quick catnap.

This might mean she was ready for bed nearer 7 pm rather than 11 pm.

Maybe she's actually getting a little bit too much sleep, during the day ?

Only a suggestion.

Hi All,

Thanks for the help and advice, glad to know that I'm not the only one going through this.

Ananyamum, what do you mean by "Cluster Feeding"? Never heard of that one. Currently my dd wakes about 7-8am already. About three weeks ago I transferred her to a cot from the Moses basket and put her in a gro bag, the second night with this and she slept through and has done every since (touch wood) I have tried feeding her earlier than 11pm but found if it was any earlier than 10pm she would wake about 3am for a feed, anytime after 10pm and she sleeps through, and I know which one I prefer!!

RachD I'm going to try your suggestion too, about trying to structure her napkins through out the day, I'll let you know how she gets on.

Once again thanks everyone for the words of encouragement and support.

it was suggested to me (although i never had a chance to try this out, so no idea if this will work) to try to feed every hour after about 6-7pm. i guess to try and really fill them up so they sleep better and for longer. but looks like you and dd are doing great. fingers crossed. keep us posted!

Have you tried swaddling?

bec23 - have you read the babywhisperer book - it is really good with this issue - might help you

for what it's worth, it is very young to expect the 7 til 7 routine - 3 to 4 hours cycles at this age is probably more likely

Hi, we also had this problem in the beginning. We had to resort to letting ds cry. Not many people like this, but it worked for us. We bathed him at 6pm, fed him at 6.30 and straight to bed at 6.45-7pm. For first few days he cried, but the length of time he cried lessened.
We were lucky to have my mum with us to give us a hand(ie to stop us picking him up!)
He slept from 7-6am from 6 weeks old as has ever since.