14wks old and waking every hour

[mimmymouse]

Absolute desperation. My DD is 14 weeks old and although, once upon a time, she used to sleep a few longer patches (such as 5-6hrs in one go followed by maybe a 4 hour patch) she now wakes every hour through the night. Her day naps are around 30 minutes. I'm so tired now from lack of sleep. I thought I was doing every thing right but clearly I'm not..... All advice welcome. Truly, welcome!

Many thanks.

Hi - firstly, I don't think you are doing anything wrong so don't give yourself a hard time. I have a 15 week old girl and she rarely goes beyond 3 hours without breastfeeding. But, when I put her in the pram and go out she can go much longer - maybe worth a try. Even on days when you physically don't feel able to walk, a walk may help settle your baby for longer. Some days I walk around like a zombie but it does give me some rest from feeding. In a growth spurt she fed every 2 hours. Is your baby using your breast as a comfort? have you tried using a dummy? On several occasions I have brought my baby into the bed with me, just because I didn't have the energy to get her back to sleep in her crib and strangely, she sleeps a lot longer when she is next me. x

Thanks Felicie. Sounds like I'm trying many of the same things you are! We're using a dummy, only when she is in the cot. I have brought her into bed with me on occasion when desperation strikes! (I found the same thing - she often sleeps better.) And we had a nice long walk in the sunshine this afternoon even though I felt like a zombie! (I must admit, I enjoyed the fresh air.) I've not been feeding her every hour at night - I've limited it to every 3 hours, which is the feed cycle she has during the day. I had a rather good visit with a HV this afternoon who suggested I could afford to feed her more. I'm to offer her both breasts at each feed and see if that helps. The worst part of all of this is that I've had to go back to work - it's part-time (ish, I freelance) but it's horrid to leave her. (She is with my hubby.) I'm also having to express litres of milk and the HV told me I need to give her more. Tempting to never leave the house again!! I think the HV might be right....more food is a good start. She went down really easily this evening (she often does) but was awake again just over an hour later, though re-settled easily.

Thanks for your response. It's nice to know that I'm not alone. I appreciate your time.

Definitely not alone, am in a similar place with my 13wk old, used to only wake twice a night and for the past week or so it's gone mental- last night it was bed 7.30, dreamfeed 9.45, awake 11.15, 12.50, 2.15, 3.45, 4.50 then in bed with us & slept until 7. She feeds every 2hrs in the day, although feeds rarely last longer than 10mins, I had been thinking of trying to make her go longer between feeds theorising that she would then be able to go for longer stretches at night. Maybe not based on what you've been told. Sorry not to have anything useful to suggest. How was your night last night?

It might be that she is overtired. 30 minute day naps are not really enough. Most 'people' say that anything less than and hour doesn't count. This may be a good place to start as it's easier to cope with sleep issues during the day. Have you read 'the baby whisperer' and 'no cry sleep solutions'? They give good advice about getting babies to self-settle and what NOT to do (or how to correct if you are already doing what NOt to do!!)

I have a bad sleeper (always has been) but after a few weeks of work, she now sleeps for 1.5 hrs in the morning, 2 hrs at lunchtime and about 45mins to an hour catnap late afternoon. Nights have gone from dreadful to manageable and I no longer have to trawl the streets with her in the buggy to get her to sleep (she is 16wo).

Izpie, no change. And Gummymum, I agree, overtired. Have read 'Baby Whisperer' and DH is desperate for me to throw it out the window!!

She goes to sleep, she just doesn't stay asleep.

Saw HV who suggested I need to feed her more, but not more often. She is now being offered both breasts at each feed, but sticking to three hour feeds. She doesn't appear to be hungry at night - outside of the three hour cycle. She is just awake.

Gummymum, how did you get yours to sleep for so long?!

Nice to know I'm not alone. x

It's bloody hard work and she will still often wake at the magic 30mins, but I go in quickly and resettle her. She has always had a dummy but I don't think it matters how you do it. We have gone from 30mins of shushing and patting and feeling desperate and pissed off, to 5 mins of settling with a head stroke.

Setting the scene is important. It is pretty dark in the nursery, she is in a Woombie and the dummy is a strong sleep signal (although I am desperate to get rid of it!).

I am quite determined and I think the most important thing is not to get them up until the time has passed (even if all that time is spent trying to get them to sleep).

It's not perfect by any means - she is a CRAP sleeper. I am now restricted by her nap times, but if I miss them she has a meltdown by the evening and the night is horrendous so I don't really mind.

BTW, I have found it easier since she has gone to four hourly feeds in the last week or so - it allows more time for everything!!

I can't get 19wk DS to stay asleep. He'll have 3-4 naps of around 30-45 mins in the day, go down to sleep around 7pm and then if I am very lucky stay asleep til 9.30, but then will be up every 60-90mins til 6.30 when he is firmly awake. He goes from being fast asleep to awake and screaming really quickly, compared to what I remember from DD who would grumble for a bit before crying.

I can't get him to resettle, whatever I try he ends up screaming unless I BF him. And he's not really feeding, more just sucking himself back to sleep. He won't take a dummy, spits it out. He was sleeping pretty well, 7-1, then 3 and 6, but it's all gone to pot. I share your desperation. Help! :(

Sounds like four-month sleep regression to me. My DS started doing this at 15 weeks (he is now 24 weeks and his sleep is still awful but that's another matter).

Do a search on here for AngelDog's posts on this - she is the MN sleep regression guru :)

Much better night. Down at 8.30pm, resettled once at 9.30pm. Awake enough to demand a feed at 12.30am but was essentially a dreamfeed. Straight back to sleep til 5.20am. Another dreamfeed. Woke at 9am. Mummy and Daddy feel drunk due to genuine REM sleep.

Have removed sleep positioner and put towels through cot bars to prevent her hurting herself, but she can move around now. Although she did move a little, she didn't move enough to wake herself or hurt herself. Towels were handy though as her little hand was rather close to the bars.

I still do not understand it all. Could it just have been sleep positioner??? She was a much, much happier little person this morning. Thank goodness!

WildhoodChuder you have my utmost sympathy. We noticed that our DD was chewing furiously on her hands and screaming a high pitched scream last night - teething behaviour. Is that what is happening to your boy? In which case, might Calpol be appropriate?

I thought we'd hit sleep regression around weeks 12-16, perhaps not! He is very dribbly mimmymouse, I've been trying Dentinox but perhaps Calpol would be better, or longer lasting anyway. DH gave him a bottle last night so I actually slept from 8-12, makes so much difference. If only I could get DS to sleep that long!

And we're back to waking up every hour. Crikey this is tedious. She was such a happy girl yesterday, clearly benefitting from sleep. Why, why, why is she doing this to herself?

We've had some small success last night with gripe water administered mid-feed, it does seem to be wind troubling DS mainly. And when I say small success, he managed 9pm-1am all in one go with no wakings, 3am I got away with picking him up, winding for a bit and putting him back down (no feed to sleep!) so that was a positive. He had another feed at 5 so actually managed feeds at 7pm, 9pm, 1am and 5am which I'd be delighted with if he could just lose the windy wakings in between... I wonder if your DD might have wind mimmymouse, if having more space to move is helping her shift it herself? A warning if you try gripe water though, we've spilt half a bottle of it trying to pour it out in the semi-dark, it is very hard to tell when you've filled the spoon before it overflows!

Ignore me - last night I did everything the same it and was back to up every hour from midnight... sigh.

My DS was the same at 14 weeks, figured out it was 3 month growth spurt. He was 2 weeks early. I was up all night for about 3 days. I was exhausted!!

It passed though and then he started teething.... got his first at 4months! It was never ending!

He's now 6 months and sleeps from 7-7 with one feed at 5am, sometimes not even. So what I guess I am saying is it will get better!! Just try and sleep when she sleeps. I didn't even get dressed for 3 days, grubby I know but I couldn't face it.

Oh and calpol saved me from going mad! Get yourself some plastic syringes from Boots, much easier than trying to spoon feed it. And may I suggest a glass of wine for you