Naps and bedtime for a just turned 2 year old boy?

[Teaandcakeplease]

My boy has been a good sleeper for a long time but it all seems to be going to pot lately. He needed his nap in the morning between 10.30am and 12 for a long long time. When my DD began nursery in January between 12.15 and 3.15pm I moved his nap to after I?d dropped her at nursery, so it would give me time to do chores etc around the flat and it was more convenient for feeding them lunch together early and then dropping her off without a big rush. DD always goes to bed at 6pm since she dropped her nap, as she?s completely shattered and sleeps through to 6.30 ? 7am. She?s shares a room with her brother, as I live in a small 2 bed flat. My son when he had his nap in the morning also went to bed at 6pm and slept through to morning. The last year since they began to share has been great, they?ve both slept so well together in their room.

I moved him into a bed (bottom bunk) about 6 weeks ago and to begin with he slept great in it. He has a pillow and duvet and seemed to enjoy it. Cot collapsed and passed onto a friend as things were going so well. But he has begun to wake crying for me in the last 4 weeks and asking for ?hugs!? or ?hot milk!?. He?s never co-slept with me ever, hasn?t had a feed in the night for a long time and he?s doing this at least 3 times a night. I?m exhausted. I?m doing rapid returns every time and trying to be consistent. At the moment I keep him up to about 7pm or 7.30pm as his nap in the day is from 1pm to 3pm. I?ve tried moving his nap back again to how it used to be but it doesn?t make any difference, I?ve also tried setting up the travel cot too but he?s still waking lots. He?s also if I then try to put him to bed at 6pm after the morning nap is unsettled and keeps getting up and asking for hugs. Because he?s always been so great I?m now feeling at a loss as to how to improve things again. By the time he goes to sleep at 8pm after all the shenanigans, I only have an hour maybe hour and a half before I have to go to bed so I can cope with all the up and downs at night. Please tell me it?s going to get better again. I?m exhausted. I?m a lone parent and I need my time off at night for my sanity and good sleep so I?m not grumpy. I?m not working and there hasn?t been any great changes in home life at all. He?s begun to talk much better lately is this a developmental stage?

So what do you do with your 2 years olds that works?

Hi tea

Do you think ds might have outgrown his naps in the day time ? my ds stopped having naps at 2.5yrs so instead i put him to bed at 6.30pm , Dd still used to sleep in the car at school pick ups for ds until she was 3yrs old now she goes to bed at 7.30pm . Would he be very cranky if you skipped his morning nap ?

He is having an extra half an hours nap in the afternoon (10.30-12) (1-3) so I would cut this down to the 1.30 hours he had before the switch.

I would also think about whether he has now got into a routine of crying at bedtime, I would ignore and not give him the milk etc and continue with the rapid return.

:)

I took dd's one existing afternoon nap away from her when she was 2yrs 2 mths, it had sent her bedtime totally to pot and she was taking hooooours to get to sleep.

It's a bit hellish for a week or so as they get uber crotchety towards proper bedtime, but soon passed.

I think swapping from a cot to a bed can often be unsettling for little ones. I'd suggest sticking to his 6pm bedtime rather than going later as being over tired can upset thier sleep patterns and lead to early waking.

I'd stick with the rapid return too. When we put DS in his bed for the first time, I actually ended up putting a stairgate on his bedroom door because he wandered so much and I was worried about him falling down the stairs when tired! It tok a few weeks, but he soon learnt that bedtime was bedtime and stayed put. Having his big sister there to show him what to do might help too - assuming she's staying in bed and not being disturbed by him?

Changing/dropping naps and changing beds always needs an adjustment period. Hopefully, it'll improve for you soon.

Sorry I think my original post maybe confusing. He's having one 2 hr nap at the moment from 1pm - 3pm. He used to have a morning nap but not anymore.

It is tempting to skip the nap instead blatherskite. Very tempting. I always put him straight back to bed and never give him milk. I offer water if he's thirsty which he never drinks but just gets cross that I won't give him milk. He never used to wake at night Hasn't had a night feed since he was 14-16 months maybe?

DD stays in bed, she's a little star. Last night she woke and shouted "go to sleep DS!" as he was disturbing her. What sort of stairgate did you use Blathers? Their door opens inwards and I was trying to think about stairgates that would work and not get in the way too much.

Hi Tea, sorry to hear DS is having sleep difficulty, you must be so tired. I do think it might be worth your trying to drop the nap, or maybe just cut it down to 30 minutes, the first week will be tough though.

Only other thing I can think of is that when DS was that age, he started waking in the night several times and also calling out for "hugs." After much discussion the following days (he would be too upset to talk about it in the night) we discovered that he had developed a fear of the dark. Leaving the nightlight on solved it completely.

Good point about the nightlight gomummy , DD still has hers on at night time .

They have the nice ikea nightlight in their room.

We had screw in gates Tea. That way we could shut the door too. They wouldn't fit when he moved rooms before DD was born though - luckily, he'd learnt to stay put by then.

Oh poor you.... my dd was a bad sleeper from birth until 3ish - :(
I would definitely drop the afternoon nap and see if that helps.

XX

Tea Cut his naps in half. DD started doing that and I noticed on days she has a 2+ hour nap, that night is full of up and down by me. After he dozes off for nap, gage an hour, and go up and gently open his door all the way so he still wakes on his own. That's what seems to be working over here, although I'm missing my 2 hours in the afternoon too, but I guess it was bound to happen at some point.

I didn't give him a nap today which made the day feel very long. He was red eyed and grumpy by 3pm but I managed to keep him up. I put him to bed at 6pm but he was more unsettled than usual. Probably from being overtired I suspect. So I think your plan GotArt is better. I was so desperate for a good night I decided to try keeping him up all day. Poor boy. I feel guilty.

Don't feel guilty. DS dropped his nap entirely at about 2.5 so he could have been ready. You've checked and he isn't - no harm done.

Tomorrow, try the half-length nap and see how you do.

Does movement of the bunks wake him at night? If your DD shifts around could this jostle him? Maybe try attaching the bed to the wall with a bracket or two to stabilise it?

Does he have a safety rail? Sometimes rolling too close to the edge would wake DD4 when she moved to her big girl bed (sometimes not, and I would hear the telltale thump). I put DD4 in a very small sleeping bag because she rolled around a lot in bed and usually lost her blankets. With the sleeping bag, I think she felt covered and enclosed.

Maybe a large stuffed animal to hug? (Not that you are anything like a large stuffed animal )

He has his sisters old pink rail originally from Mothercare. Maybe that's it, he doesn't like the fact he has the pink rail? I couldn't be bothered to go out and buy a blue one instead

I don't think the bunk beds move, but that's a good point. DD has a matttress protector that crackles as she rolls. But she's had that even when he was in the cot in there sleeping instead.

Tomorrow is a busy day ex-FIL is down and we're taking the DCs to London Aquarium, courtesy of FIL's pocket So I hope he's not so over tired that he'll be hideous tomorrow.

He has 2 comforters he sleeps with - a cuddles time big soft dog and a little bunny.

He has 16 teeth now, is that it? Or is he due some more

He has another 4 teeth to come then - the molars - which seem to remember going on forever and definitely disturbing sleep with my DD.

Oh no His last set of teeth came through yonks ago. I thought that was it.

I keep listening out waiting for him to come to his bedroom door saying "mummy" in his little voice. But he hasn't yet. I'm going to clean my teeth and go to bed in the hope that I'll feel better for it and see how tonight goes.

I know money is tight but if you can stretch to it, I would highly reccommend HippyChick mattress protectors. Just as waterproof but no crackle at all. They're about £17 for a single bed one I think.

I got one for our brand new mattress when very pregnant with DD just in case my waters went in bed and it's so good - we still have it on! Thought about taking it off but figured it wasn't doing any harm and easn't bothering us so it might as well keep being used. Was very handy when DS felt ill, walked into our room, climbed onto our bed....and puked! Mattress was saved

If it is the crackle, that would solve it

He woke at 12 only but was awake for good at 6am

But he's going to be tired today. I'm still open to more ideas, I'm taking them all on board. I'm taking the kids up to see grandparents at Easter for the first time and I'm worried he'll sleep badly there too right now.

HOpe you had a good day at London Aquarium and that you all survived.

Ok I'll probably get flamed for suggesting this but I'm going to post it anyway as I know people who did try this when their DC got into a bad routine of regularly waking at night - they resorted to medication. There's a travel sickness medicine (I think) or anti histimine which you can use after they're 2 and I know people who used that. Is it worth talking to the chemist or GP? I almost used some herbal remedy but in the end didn't bother.

Hope you get some uninterrupted sleep soon.
Big supportive hugs for you all
X

Yes Piriton also has an antihystamine in that causes drowsiness. However I do not want to rely on drugs to solve my sleep problems. Yes it would be nice to have a break and muster up the strength again that is required. However the underlying problem would still be there with my son.

My plan of action on the boys jack in the box at night will be consistent bedtime and a nap and a silent return him to bed. I've been thinking about it and I'm sure as he was a good sleeper before, if I try to be mega consistent, this stage will pass. It was bound to happen with moving him to a bed, that he'd want to get up for hugs and to see what was going on. The trouble is I think when he rouses a bit now, he's forcing himself awake to come and see me and I need to get him back on track as the lack of sleep is making me shattered and it's not good for him, and his behaviour in the day is deteriorating because of it too. In fact he's waking earlier and earlier now too because of being tired and all of the jack in the box shenanigans.

On the upside when the clocks change in a few weeks he'll adjust very easily

BTW if you're still following this thread, by being stricter on routine his sleep has improved massively. Woke at 6.50am today. Loads and loads better. Hope it lasts

Yey! Glad he's improving :)