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2.5 week old baby - co-sleeping on chest?

4 replies

Piranha1981 · 22/02/2011 11:36

Our baby is 19 days old and at night she is becoming increasingly distressed if I try to get her to sleep in her bednest cot (right next to our bed). As a result we have been co-sleeping which seems like the easiest and best way of settling her until she gets a bit bigger and more confident about going into her bed nest.

I have tried to follow the guidance about co-sleeping, making sure duvets and pillows can't go over her head, putting her between me and side of bed etc., but the thing I am struggling with is getting her to sleep on her back. Sometimes I manage to put her flat on her back on top of the duvet with me under the duvet facing her, and that worked for a while... however we then had 4 nights where she still cried and got really distressed and I was starting to feel absolutely dreadful from lack of sleep - I think she was unhappy because she still didn't feel close enough to me to feel my body warmth / hear my heart beat etc.

So last night, after I had become extremely tired, she slept on my chest for most of the night, only waking up to feed. I had the duvet pushed down to my waist and tucked in so it couldn't ride up, with just a thin blanket covering her and my top half. It is the best night's sleep we have both had since she was born, and I found it very easy to wake up for feeds since I was very sensitive to her rooting cues (whereas when she has been beside me I haven't always managed to wake up immediately).

However I know the guidance is that babies should sleep on their backs and I don't want to do anything that could be dangerous. I instinctively feel that her on my chest is safer than next to me, as I was much more aware of her presence / breathing / feeding cues etc. and there is no way I would roll on her since I am effectively pinned to the bed(she's not a light new-born baby either!), but that obviously isn't what the official guidance says.

Also I do worry about whether doing this will mean she is harder to settle in her bed nest further down the line - obviously she is still very young so possibly a little premature to be worrying about this but still...

Has anyone else found this way of sleeping worked for them? Is this as bad an idea as the guidance makes out and should I try to get her to go on her back again beside me? I really don't want to do anything that would endanger her but last night I was just at my wit's end - was such a relief to find a way of getting some proper sleep for one night!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
emalushka · 22/02/2011 11:52

Hi,

I have a 12 week old baby and for the first 4 weeks of her life, she slept on my chest with her face towards me. It does go against all guidelines, I know, but it was the only way to get her to sleep. Now at 12 weeks, she sleeps well on her own, in a moses basket next to my bed.

It was dangerous, but for my own sanity and for my other child, I had to do it. I also have a demanding toddler and just couldn't cope during the day if I didn't get any sleep.

It's up to you to decide, but I'm really glad I did it in those first few weeks as she is now such a good sleeper. BUT I'm sure others will have different advice based on their experiences.

chummum · 22/02/2011 12:01

Hi, I usually just lurk but wanted to post on this thread because I know how knackering a newborn is!
We made numerous mistakes but followed everthing exactly to the guidelines with our 1st two!
Then years later with number 3 and just did what was easiest so we all slept! Our dd used to spend the 1st 3 hours of the night on dh chest in living room on her front, he couldn't move and made sure everything was to hand. I would grab a few hours in our bed, then when she woke (anywhere between 10-11) he would bring her up to me for feeding. She would then spend the rest of the night on my chest in our bed, waking up for feeds etc. I had a bedside crib, it was only used in the day in the beginning, but obviously as she got older I started transferring her into it, eventually straight away still awake!
In the end at 12 weeks we had put her in her own room and she was sleeping through the night!
Obviously you have to be very careful, I slept more in the middle of the bed and had pillows either side too! I'm quite a light sleeper though, hubby was pushed right to the edge!! I slept in a robe and put a baby blanket over her. We have a superking size bed, none of us smoke and rarely drink alcohol.
Just wanted to share our experience, maybe your HV can advise? I told ours when we were doing it and she didn't bat an eyelid!
Good luck.

ReshapeWhileDamp · 22/02/2011 12:27

I think the worry about sleeping on the front is that they can sleep very deeply like that and if they have a breathing problem, there's a danger that they can't wake themselves. If your baby is on you, you will be hyper-aware of them and if they get into difficulties, I would imagine that you'd wake and be able to respond. Many many new babies sleep like this IME.

disclaimer: this seems like common sense but I'm not a HCP! Grin

matana · 22/02/2011 20:04

Sounds exactly what i did and it kept both myself and my DS (and DH) sane! You're doing it safely so chill out and enjoy it. I always felt so much happier sleeping tummy to tummy and it was the only way my DS could get comfortable in those early weeks - i wasn't prepared to put him on his front in the moses basket. I was always ultra aware of his breathing and movement in terms of safety, yet we got some good sleep like that. Your LO is still so tiny - don't worry just yet about getting her to settle in her own bed later on. DS managed the transition easily from around 8 weeks when his wind calmed down. Carry on as you are, adhere to the safety guidance and sod those nay sayers.

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