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11 month son, goes to sleep on front but wakes upset most nights!!!

10 replies

GrannyG2 · 10/02/2011 09:23

Hi,

This is the first time I have ever gone on a forum so it shows how desperate I'm getting:-) And apologies if this is a bit long winded but any advice is gratefully received.

My 11 month son started turning on his tummy in his cot at 9 months (Dec). He will go to sleep on his front/side but he regularly wakes up once or twice in the night because he's on his front. I think it may be because he's woken up with a fright but he won't settle until one of us (usually me!) goes in to turn him back over.

He can now sit up in the cot & pull himself up on the bars and even though I know he can lie himself down again he rarely ever does.

He's also had a virus for last 4 weeks (vomiting/diarrhoea) which has meant he is waking even more at night time. I didn't want to leave him to cry and settle himself as it's hard to tell if he woke because he wasn't feeling well.

He is finally over the virus so I want to try and get to the stage that we can get a full night sleep again (especially as I have gone back to work now). He has also started at nursery 3 days a week but seems to be coping fine although they are having trouble getting him to sleep too.

I was hoping by now that as he's sleeping on his front he would have got used to it and not wake up but it seems to be getting worse, not better.

Is it just a case of having to leave them to cry in the night for a few nights until he learns that we won't come in or are there any other alternatives?

If anyone has any experience of this or any suggestions that would be fantastic!!!

OP posts:
lostinspain · 10/02/2011 10:43

Hello grannyg2, I'm a forum rookie too and Im afraid I havent got much useful advice, just lots of sympathy. Both of you having been ill for four weeks must have been awful. Im not sure but it sounds to me that with the illness, plus him starting nursery and you going back to work, it's probably quite normal that his sleep's been disrupted.

Have you done any sleep training before? If not, if he doesn't settle down again, maybe give it a go. I did with my DS at around 8 months and it was a big help because he was a terrible sleeper before then. But pick a time when there's not too much going on, cos you and your partner both need to be able to push through it. Emotionally it's quite tough for the first few days.

Again Im not sure but I'd hazard that the sleeping position issue is a bit of a red herring - I'd say the reason you have to go in is not cos he needs turning over, but cos he needs to see you before he can go back to sleep. As far as I know, and I know you probably don't want to hear this, I think the only way through this is the sleep training. If they're not naturally self-settling, they need a bit of a nudge unfortunately.

Actually, I was on the forums looking for info about babies suddenly getting disrupted sleep / early rising at around 12 months. DS just turned one, and started walking. Apparently coinciding with this, he's suddenly started to wake at 5.30-ish, which I'm finding really hard-going. Does anyone know, is there a cognitive-developmental stage around 12 months that causes sleep disruption? Maybe this could also explain our woes....

GrannyG2 · 10/02/2011 11:04

Hi Lostinspain,

thanks for the reply, helps to know I'm not alone. You may have a point that it's more about seeing us than being on his tum!

Have you got any tips on sleep training/useful websites?

Also, just out of interest, what does DS mean?!

Good luck with your query too...530 is very early...

OP posts:
lostinspain · 10/02/2011 11:29

DS = dear son. similarly DD is dear daughter, DP is dear partner, etc! the abbreviations totally confused me at first. here's a list...
www.mumsnet.com/info/acronyms

there's loads and loads on sleep training on the net, probably lots of book recommendations you should look at too. just google "sleep training" and "controlled crying" and have a browse. I would have a good read up before you decide what to do / whether to do it at all. however I definitely wouldnt just leave him to cry indefinitely. it's best to find a method you have faith in, cos you'll be happier to follow it through then. sleep training, or controlled crying, is controversial, many people are completely anti- it. but if you decide it's right for you, I would go for it. (you and your partner both need to be firmly on board though. if one of you's not really happy with it, it won't work!) it's totally essential to keep body and soul together to be an effective mum, and if the sleep issue is really killing you, especially now you're back at work, you might find it makes a massive improvement.

we're in spain so we followed a spanish method, it's been translated into english though: www.amazon.co.uk/Days-Perfect-Nights-Sleep-Child/dp/0345501802/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1297337092&sr=8-1
lots of our english friends here have used it and we've all found it very helpful.

hope you find something that works for you. hang in there, things will get better!

GrannyG2 · 10/02/2011 12:28

Thanks for the list of acronyms, I've been getting very confused!!

Also for the additional information, it's helpful to have somewhere to start.

I wish I was in Spain right now, I'm sure the weather is better than here:-)

OP posts:
lostinspain · 10/02/2011 13:28

no worries. the weather's lovely here but I wish there was an NCT! and any playgroups, mums groups, and good nurseries would be handy...

good luck!

lostinspain · 10/02/2011 14:45

btw this page from this site is helpful too...

www.mumsnet.com/babies/sleep-training-and-controlled-crying

lostinspain · 10/02/2011 14:46

oops I mean
www.mumsnet.com/babies/sleep-training-and-controlled-crying

lostinspain · 10/02/2011 14:47

stupid link keeps pasting with a space in it. take out the space in "controlled" and it works.

GrannyG2 · 10/02/2011 15:31

Thanks alot...I've already ordered the book you recommended (yes, I'm that desperate!).

OP posts:
lostinspain · 10/02/2011 17:03

go for it! much better than keeping soldiering on and suffering. I'm sure you'll be feeling loads better very soon.

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