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Sleep

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Original poster

Please reassure me it is not completely unusual for my 8 month old to still be waking at night

23 replies

Househunter · 18/01/2011 08:41

My 8mo dd2 goes down at 7pm and usually wakes at least once in the evening for a quick feed and resettle. She then feeds at about 11 and at some point in the night, so I'm usually only woken once. My dd1 only started sleeping through at 2 years and was often up wailing for hours in the night, which was very distressing, so the situation with dd2 doesn't seem too bad to me.

But MIL says in her day babies slept through by 6 weeks, and HV said several months ago it is because I am still breastfeeding so she can't settle herself. I actually always put her down awake so I think she can settle herself. It just seems 12 hours is a long time to go without seeing mummy and I do think she gets hungry despite being on 3 meals a day. I don't think I could realistically get any more calories into her in the day, so can't see how things will change any time soon...

Please tell me I am not the only one in this situation

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

andthenshewasdone · 18/01/2011 08:46

you are not alone. my dd2 is now just 9 months and is breastfeeding in the night, very similair to what you describe. she is a bit teethy, a bit snotty etc so i assume it is mostly about comfort-but that is a good enough reason for a little baby i think!

Wigeon · 18/01/2011 08:48

Wow - only waking up once a night and settling back - brilliant! My DD first slept through the time for the first time ever at 8 months, and then went through months of mostly not sleeping through and occasionally sleeping through. So she was most certainly not sleeping through at 8 months. I was BF by the way.

What on earth is your HV saying that you are "still" BF?! I am truely shocked. I'm sure you know (and she should know) all the health guidelines about breast is best blah blah, World Health Organisation Guidelines to BF for 2 years (yes, 2 years). Why would you switch to formula at 8 months if you and your DD are both happy BF?

I think things seem to be going really really well, you and your DD are clearly happy. Keep going with it!

And I'm sure you will get quite a few people coming on to say that they FF and their babies still didn't sleep through.

DO NOT listen to your HV and MIL!

RobynLou · 18/01/2011 08:50

you're definitely not alone!

the majority of my DDs peers weren't sleeping through at 8 months.

DD was, she slept through from 5m till she was 9m, then started waking up again and didn't sleep through until she was 2.5years

Wigeon · 18/01/2011 08:50

Also impressed that your DD is able to go to sleep herself - I really don't see what the problem is.

Bucharest · 18/01/2011 08:50

My daughter is 7.
She first slept through at 4 yrs and 10 mths.

wolfhound · 18/01/2011 08:53

Totally normal. Ignore MIL, those babies were crying a lot, bar the odd exception. Your DD2 sounds like she's doing well. If you want, you could read Elizabeth Pantley ('Sleep no cry' or something like that) for quite useful tips on altering sleep habits when breastfeeding or a book another MNer recently recommended called 'Wonder Weeks', which shows how normal night waking is and why it happens at different ages. And shocked at your silly health visitor for being disparaging about breastfeeding. I sometimes wonder where these sort of HVs come from, some sort of Romanian orphanage it seems. Both my DCs BF till 12 mths and fed through the night then woke in the night until about 15 months. My 18mo still does occasionally. They are very happy cheerful little boys and I am still alive :)

Original poster

Househunter · 18/01/2011 09:05

Thank you all! Hurray - we are normal!

I was just getting fed up of comments from other parents expressing shock and horror that dd2 still wakes, and helpfully telling me their dc slept through from a few weeks old (why do they feel the need to tell me that????).

I think we just had such a horrendous time with dd1's sleep that anything better seems ok, but I was wondering if I should be hoping for more. But if this is as good as it gets, that's fine for now.

Yes, I agree formula won't help. DH keeps suggesting if she had formula she would be sleeping through by now... DD1 had formula from 6 mo and it definitely didn't lead to any improvement. I think by bf I can settle her much quicker than faffing around with bottles and maybe thats why she is a better sleeper than dd1.

Thanks for letting me waffle on. I feel like I am doing the right thing now.

OP posts:

mamaloco · 18/01/2011 09:11

DD2 had formula from 2 months and she still woke up till about 10 months. She is 11 months now she hasn't been fed during the night since she is 5/6 months but still woke up.
It has been 2/3 weeks of sleeping from 7h30 till 5h30 (everything still crossed).
DD1 slept through almost from birth I had to wake her up for more than 1 months to get her enough feeds in her.

ifaistos · 18/01/2011 09:24

Got a mil in front of me as I type asking me, as she does at least 3 times a week, whether ds is sleeping through yet - he's 2mo btw. dd was terrible sleeper too, at 8mo she was waking several times a night.

I don't know why people feel this need to share about their wonderful sleepers, and I never know what to say when they do. But you're definitely not alone househunter. It sounds to me like you're doing really well.

RobynLou · 18/01/2011 09:28

there's always the option of lying and saying they're sleep through even if they're not....

isn't 'sleeping through' actually just sleeping for a 5 hour stretch though? I'm sure someone told me that's what doctors call sleeping through...

jbells · 18/01/2011 09:32

you are def not alone my DD didnt sleep thru the nite till 13 months :( it felt like torture butit will end eventually, i didnt breastfeed so its not bcos of that, ignore your HV etc all babies are different and i guess some just dont sleep very well (not great news for us) DD is now 21 months and always sleeps thru (well almost) now expecting no2 lets hope this one conforms to sleeping thru at 6 weeks hehe

floozietoozie · 18/01/2011 09:35

Ignore, ignore, ignore. HV's talking crap. Friends baby was EBF and slept through from about 10 weeks and I mean slept through, not six hour stretch. They're just all different. FWIW ds used to sleep through the night perfectly well. Then last summer aged 3.5 he started having bad dreams and now wakes almost every night and comes in with me. It can change too!

pozzled · 18/01/2011 09:36

Perfectly normal IME. Sounds to me like you're doing everything right, putting her down awake so she is able to settle herself. She just needs that night feed still, when she is ready she will drop it herself. Definitely too soon to be worrying about it, and not anyone else's business.

happygilmore · 18/01/2011 10:17

My DD is 8 months and FF and wakes up twice a night for feeds..she too is on 3 meals a day and can't get any more food or milk in during the day, so what else can we do?

At least you're bf and don't have to get up for formula! Don't think formula would help at all!

Mumcah · 18/01/2011 11:10

Same here...my DS started going 12 hours at night in November but since December has woken every night. If he wakes just once that is a good night!
I'm not breastfeeding anymore and he's on 3 meals and 3 bottles a day plus one when he wakes up.

I think he'll go all night again at some point as he has got 6 new teeth since Christmas. I'll consider some sleep training once he gets to 12 months which is what I did with DD.

It is strange as he goes to bed so easily and self settles. My DD was a thumb sucker which definitely helped.

wolfhound · 18/01/2011 12:35

robyn lou - yes, i think the definition of 'sleeping through' is actually a 5 hour stretch that crosses midnight. So hardly a 7pm to 7pm sleepfest!

happygilmore · 18/01/2011 12:59

God we don't even have any teeth yet!

InmaculadaConcepcion · 18/01/2011 13:07

Most of the babies on my post-natal thread aren't sleeping through yet and they're all around 11mo.
A mixture of BF and FF, too.

Sleeping through (technically) means between the hours of 00.00 and 05.00...

...something my DD has done twice in her life. She's never yet gone from bedtime to getting up time without waking at least once.

I still don't sleep through and I'm 40

Blackletterday · 18/01/2011 13:07

My ds2 is 14 months and went through a period of sleeping through. Lately he wakes up 3/4 hours after going down and won't settle again for 3 hours . It's normal, my older 2 were better sleepers and mostly slept through from 6 months, didn't realise how lucky I was.

cbmum · 18/01/2011 21:14

You're not alone. Dd1 was born in sept 08 and I can count on one hand the number of nights I've slept through-never mind her or dd2 who is 5mths! Dd2 started to reliably sleep through when dd2 was 2 mtgs old and she had just been 2. For a while I was up with one or both of them for most of the night. Dd1 finally started to sleep through once she'd got most of her teeth but even now when she's ill sleep is the first thing to go to pot.

By comparison dd2 is good nut my friends still think it's terrible. Dd2 will generally be asleep by 7.15 then wake twice for food before waking for no ascertainable reason at 5.10am and is then cuddled to sleep by me til she wants feeding at 6.30. She is mainly formula fed btw and has been mixed fed from the start.

Health visitors know squat and after a terrible experience with dd1 my policy has been to ignore anything that comes out of their mouths!

sheepgomeep · 19/01/2011 00:11

I FF and my 8 month old dd3 definetely does not sleep through

She has done on occaision done from 730 pm till 530 am but thats rare! now its more likely half seven till one, feed, six pm with afew whinges inbetween

YeahBut · 19/01/2011 00:20

Sleeping through the night = myth. The only regular night sleeper in this house is the dog.
Ds is 4.11 and still can't sleep through the night. The girls were exactly the same. TBH, it wasn't until they were about 6 or 7 that I could put them to bed at 7pm and have them sleep through 'til 6am.
DH is 42 and has never slept through the night.

Cosmosis · 20/01/2011 20:53

Yeahbut I was saying the same today to a friend! I very rarely sleep through (well I certainly don't atm as I have a 19wk old going through the 4month sleep regression) but I often wake up for a wee or a drink so why do we expect tiny babies to not need the same! The only difference is that I don't keep the whole house up when I wake up in the night

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