Question for the co-sleeping gurus

[smellsofsick]

Now that I've accepted co-sleeping as actually being rather nice and not the scary option I thought it was, I've got a quick question or two for the experts out there.

• did sleeping with your LO hamper their ability to sleep through the night?
• this is a bit stupid but did you sleep with them from their bedtime, say 7/8pm, or did you snooze with them downstairs before family bedtime?

Sorry if these questions sound daft, I'm just interested in seeing how it all pans out for 4 week old's sleeping patterns.

I am doing it now, but not a guru - currently we doze downstairs 'til we all go to bed, but I am trying to get out of this habit and get DD to go to bed on her own in our room at (ideal we are working towards) 7 or 7.30 and we will join her when we go to bed.

I have heard some people say they think that co-sleeping has had no effect on when the LO sleep through, and others who have said that they think co-sleeping meant they woke more (as had access to milk all night) but were happy for this to happen as the LO grew out of it at their own pace.

DD (now 16mo) sleeps on the sofa next to us watching TV in the early evening, then wakes up and has a play for an hour or so, then comes to bed with us for the night. Compared to DS, who we had to put in a cot in his own room at 4 months (different home then, with space restrictions for full size cot in our bedroom) I think it has helped her sleep through. But DH says it is just me who sleeps better as apparently DD is all over me in the night, breastfeeding and squirming, and I just sleep through it all!

I'm no guru, but this is how it works for us. Our DD (4 months) cosleeps with us, but in a cot attached to our bed. I take her to bed in the early evening when she seems sleepy, put her in her sleeping bag, give her a bottle and sit with her until she is asleep (7 or 7.30). I often watch TV in our bedroom with the sound off and subtitles on until I am sure she is asleep. If she is on me I move her into the cot area. I then leave the bedroom. She does wake once or twice in the evening some evenings (but is generally solidly asleep by 8pm). I then change her nappy and give her a dreamfeed when I come to bed at 11 or 11.30 (she does wake up sometimes for this). She then sleeps in her cot until morning (varies from 5.30 to 9am, it was reliably 8.30 but I think she is going through a growth spurt). I then change her nappy and feed her in bed. If she has woken before 7am I expect her to go back to sleep, so she lies next to me, with her head on my arm and we both go back to sleep.

So in answer to your questions:
DD seems to sleep through the night pretty reliably despite our cosleeping - not sure if this is normally the case. I think that the cosleeping actually helps as if she wakes in the evening she will cry for company, but if she wakes at night (hasn't recently as far as I am aware) she just looks over to see if I am awake (I pretend to be asleep if I don't think she needs anything).

We don't have her falling asleep in the lounge with us as my mother said she needed a bedtime if we wanted her to babysit. I did just go to bed with her in the early days which was great as I wasn't at all sleep deprived and I got dinner in bed which I loved.

Hi...I'm no guru, but have enjoyed co sleeping both with DS (13yo) & DD (11 mo)..

I learnt from my experiences with DS that, for me, a bit of a routine in the eve is better for us as a family. So, with DD we do bath, massage, etc & bed between 7 - 8, then she goes to sleep (with me feeding then lying down with her till she is deeply asleep) on a futon on the floor in our room. When she wakes during the eve, I go & re settle her. On her first night waking after I go to bed she comes in with us (or we bed swap & DH goes on the futon!).

She does not sleep through, but (almost scared to say it aloud!)night wakings have reduced to one or two lately, & generally much shorter & esier to re settle.
I followed a lot of the advice in NCSS...& I think, in particular, pulling her off the boob to sleep,& moving away from her so she has her own space in the bed & can't latch on all night, & sometimes patting/shushing back to sleep if she is not desperate for boob have all helped...so there has been some improvement/reduction in night wakings, & because I think with the co sleeping there is the minimum of kerfuffle in the night, I'm not too knackered & now feel OK about hanging in there till she is sleeping through!

Hope that helps.

Hello, I am also not a guru and was a reluctant co-sleeper though it has developed into our current routine of:
DS goes to sleep in cot at 8pm after routine of bath, feed, rocking. When he wakes (about 10) he comes in with us, his wakings are either every 2 hours (the worst!) or sleeping 5 - 6 hours in a stretch. He has increased the length of time that he sleeps while co-sleeping but he does also feed / comfort suck a lot more than if he were in his cot (I believe).

I guess with co-sleeping, you are so close and attuned to the baby so liable to get involved even when they could have gone back to sleep on their own.

Our DS is hard to settle to sleep though, so I think co-sleeping has been a sanity saver. I would not have coped waking every 2 hours and having to get out of bed each time!