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Phasing out co-sleeping - have I MARFMOB-ed*?

5 replies

CreamolaFoamFan · 23/11/2010 10:08

*Made A Rod For My Own Back, that is!

Our baby is 10 months old, and we're trying to phase out co-sleeping. We've got a side-car cot, and I've arranged it so that the side is just a little way up above the side of the mattress, so that he can't sidle into our bed, but I can comfort him easily.

This has not gone down well. We did this several nights ago, but every night goes thusly: We come up to bed. Boy fusses and I give him a dreamfeed to help him sleep longer (hah!). I put him down in his cot. He wakes, cries, rolls around, gets up on hands and knees, squeals angrily etc for 10-15 minutes then falls asleep. At last, I think. Silence for a little while, then the whole bloody thing starts again. This can go on for a couple of hours, and longer. It's most fun when I think he's completely gone to sleep, and I'll do something stupid like going to the loo or rolling over then it all starts again!

Sometime during the night, I hook him over the cot side and end up co-sleeping anyway.

We're hoping to move him into his own room in the next month (we've been so slovenly and disorganised busy that we've not quite cleared it out yet), but am dreading it if just getting him into his own cot is this much fuss. I also suspect that I am going to miss the co-sleeping quite a lot, despite the disturbed sleep, but I really think it'll be better in the long run.

He's just learned to crawl as well, so am wondering if that is affecting anything. On the plus side, he's started to use a snuggly fabric lovey thing that does seem to help comfort him sometimes.

Do I:
a) Just need to persist and go slowly and it'll work eventually?

b) Go cold turkey - not co-sleep at all and keep him in his cot all through the night come what may?

c) get the passport from the loft and run away to somewhere foreign and hot until someone else has sorted it out for me?

d) none of the above, here is my brilliant suggestion!

I favour a) and c), but would love your help and consolation! Thanks!

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
MummyBerryJuice · 23/11/2010 10:16

Have you read NCSS? (No Cry Sleep Solution). Smile. DS is 11 months old and wont even nap unless I'm next to him. Which isn't great for getting things done around the house. I've just started reading NCSS and she does give a lot of good ideas and gives you leave to go at your own pace.

I really am a 'path-of-least-resistance' type and I think there might be a chance that I'll get DS out of our bed by next year.

Oh, and developmental spurts can really make things difficult to. I'm sure someone more knowledgable will be around shortly though.

Good luck

DirtyMartini · 23/11/2010 10:20

Marking place as I have a suspicion we'll be facing this in a few months.

Not that I currently cuddle DD as all night as if she were a teddy bear/how water bottle or anything, oh no Grin

CreamolaFoamFan · 23/11/2010 11:25

Heh! I forgot to mention the excellent feed-to-sleep habit he has as well! I'm working on this, but it's possibly all a bit much to solve all his problems at the same time...

MummyBerryJuice, I have that book. I can't say I've ever been organised enough to do anything in it, but I do find it comforting reading.

OP posts:
MummyBerryJuice · 23/11/2010 11:58

Smile yes IKWYM about being organised. I'm working on introducing a lovey and 'trying' to break the feeding to sleep association first. It's quite hard at 2am though Sad.

(But sometimes it is just so lovely to wake up next to the little, warm, smiling boy!)

moirasings · 24/11/2010 05:57

Moved my co-sleeper into her onw bed at 3 years old and it was a nightmare! She didn't sleep through the night until she was seven! She had just never learned to self soothe. My DS on the other hand moved into his own cot at 4 months and into his own room at 8 months. Although we had a long bedtime routine he has been a great sleeper. So I would say move them out earlier rather than later. I have heard from other co-sleeping parents that they cope better with the move if you wait unti they are 5 years but to be honest that was too long for me.

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