CONTROLLED CRYING

[carly85]

please can someone help me? i have a 14 month daughter who has never slept through the nightup untill a few weeks ago she would sleep in her cot in her room but wake 3 times anight and id have to rock her back to sleep and then she would still get up at 5,but now for no reason she has started playing up at bedtime then when she wakes up she goes mental screaming and crying,she will slepp on me but the minute i go to put her down she screams again,the only way she will settle is putting her in our bed but thats not good cause i dont sleep and she cant get comfortable so she wriggles all night,were both extremely tired and are days are ruined by her constant moaning cause she tired,someone said i need to do controlled crying but i dont know if i can,i feel so mean and hate hearing her cry,plus i cant bear the thought of her making herself sick which im sure would happen,what is best.we cant take anymore!

wriggling all night? maybe she has tummy pain, wind??

I would never do contolled crying and my third child is just starting to learn to sleep through now

she is 4 in february

by wriggling i mean she cant get comfortable as theres no room in the bed,what do u do at night then as this isnt good for either of us?

I co sleep and hubby had the spare room till they went in their own beds sometime after three

oh my god,see i feel that me and my partner are not getting anytime togeather and its effecting are relationship,i dont want him to have to sleep in another room,do u think having a co sleeping cot would suit better?

a co sleeping cot would definitely be better

or just a king size bed

if she would settle and actually sleep in with you both if you have enough room then definitely go for it

My toddler cries to come in our bed, then wriggles and wriggles- sleeps upside down sometimes or on a diagonal! None of us sleep properly when she is in our bed-We have tried controlled crying but I can't bear it, plus she wont let up- she could go on for ages, so I'm hoping when she gets a bit bigger and I can reason with her that I can bribe her with a trip to the park or something if she stays in her own bed! Has anyone else tried controlled crying and had success? I just can't do it

I haven't ever been able to do it

gecko now stays in her bed and has no booby at night because I waited till a couple of months ago (3 and a half)and told her she was a big rhino and could have chocolate for breakfast and a sticker if she stayed in her bed

she did and now we are working on her not waking me up in the night aswell

lol at 'big rhino'
Sorry that is no help OP, I am in a similar situation, DD currently sleeping (horizontally!) in my bed

I dont think cc would work for you as your heart is not in it.

It works, quickly, but you have to be totally committed to it and have the support of your nearest and dearest.

The slower options ( that still work) for you may be gradual withdrawal or similar. Instead of rocking her every time she wakes, maybe just pick her up, soothe her and put her down as soon as she settles and just stroke her head. There will invariably be crying - but you will be with her reassuring her.

Consider no cry sleep solution as there are a lot of these methods in this book.

Hi, I have felt your pain. Am on anti deps due to the sleep deprivation and anxiety over my DDs sleep. She is 9 months old and had never slept throught the night. She would wake every 2 hrs after 11pm.

I did controlled crying 10 days ago.

Started on a Friday night so DP could do it with me. I never thought I would be strong enough to do it but I did.

Here is what we did:
I give DD the bottle in my arms in the nursery with only the nightlight on. Nice cuddle and whisper sleepy time soon and do a shocking rendition of twinkle twinkle little star!!

I put her down and stroke her hair and say sleepy time and give her a kiss.

DD is very sucky (had a dummy before leaving hosp, on midwife's advice)
I give her the dummy and it falls out when crying but have 3 in there on dummy clips for her to find.

We went in every 5 mins..10 mins max if she was quieting down. She did get a little worked up again but got better very quick. Every single time DP and I say "SHH SHH Sleepytime"

Just be prepared in case she is sick. DD was on the first two nights.

I changed her and the bed and just started again.

1st night cried for an hour every wake up. Get lots of coffee/mags/tv in bed whatever. You maybe shattered next day too. So may she.

2nd night similar but not quite as bad.

By 4th night was 20 mins and less wake ups.

By 7th night, no crying when put down.

When she wakes she just whimpers and goes back to sleep.

Keep a diary and record how many times went in and times she wakes and falls asleep. This way you can see your progress

Just remember she will give it her best shot ato get you to settle her. Stick with it and keep the end goal in sight.

Although the first 2 nights were awful, the end result is you and DD will be better off.

I nevr thought I would be the type of person to do CC but it was my last resort and now I am glad we did it.
Hope this is useful. Sorry for long post!

good luck, hope you go with your heart and dont do CC

must leave now