Toddler sleep hell!

[TheBightyMoosh]

Please help - I am so tired - my DP is so tired - my DD is so tired - we're all just at each others throats all the time, and it's driving a serious wedge between me and DP

My nearly 3yr old DD has always been a good sleeper until recently, but now for the last couple of months she has been refusing to go to sleep and can stay awake til 10/11 at night. We try the rapid return technique but we can do this up to 100 times a night, and it doesn't change a thing. We have a good routine - tea, bath, teeth, story, bed - which used to work a treat, but not anymore.

Quite often she appears wide awake and bright as a button, so it doesn't seem like she is fighting sleep all the time. But other times she will scream and scream and scream. I will always go in and sooth her if I feel she is getting herself too worked up, but I try and leave her too it. But most of the time she just won't stay in bed.

She is with a childminder in the day and will often nap for an hour or so - we are moving her to nursery in January, so I think our problems will stop once she's dropped the daytime nap and is more active (& worn out).

But has anyone got any coping strategies / hints & tips to help us get through this? We're at our wits end.....

I would consider getting the childminder to drop the nap, and see what happens. The downside might be that she might drop off exhausted at 5-6pm when bringing her home but if youc an wake her quickly from that sleep before it gets deep you might find this changes the bedtime dramatically. is she getting enough physical exercise with this childminder? if not can she walk home?
She won't get a nap at nursery age 3 so start to drop it now.

Yes, you're right - I think the only way forward is to get her childminder to drop the day time nap. I was just worried about asking her as I know nap time is her time to get cleaning / chores done. Also, I was worried that DD would still want a nap at the CMs because all the others were doing it, and she wouldn't want to be left out!

She's not active enough in the day, and again, the nursery will sort all that out as there's loads of space to run around there - while she's a bit cooped up at the CMs.

I always try and get her to walk home in an effort to wear her out - we have occasional success with that!

So, i'll chat with the CM next week, otherwise, I think we're just going to have to cope until January. It's pretty awful though - me and DP are barely speaking, which is hardly helpful.

Thanks for the good advice.

It might put your CM out, but you pay her to look after your DD and act in the best interests of your DD. I think it's perfectly reasonable to ask her to drop her nap time.

We had teh same problem with our DS when he was around three. If he had a nap he'd be up until 9 or 10, if he didn't he'd zonk out at 5:30. It's an awkward 'in-betweeny' phase but should only last a month or so.

Good luck!