For god's sake, how do you get them to nap in the cot?

[skippingturtle]

As it says really. I can't keep relying on the pram to get DD to sleep, it's raining and blowing a gale.

She's 20 weeks, please help, fed up!

With the baby I look after - she is used to being cuddled to sleep or in the pram, but I just lay her in the cot and gently stroked her face/hair or rubbed her belly and she goes to sleep like that - takes a couple of minutes and she is starting to self settle now too.

I used same routine as bed time in the day but minus the bath.

So for us I'd take her up, change nappy, sit in rocking chair, give her a bottle, put her in grow bag, set mobile off and leave her.

It took a while (yet we never had any probs at night) but I used to keep her in her room for an hour regardless of whether she slept. If she cried I'd pick up/put down.

Eventually DD decided it was easier to sleep I think!

Good luck!

Thanks, starting to get a bit anxious about winter coming and me pushing a pram through the snow!

Yes Bertie, we don't have problems putting her to sleep at night (although she's recently started waking up loads, but that's another story!), she self settles no problem. I've tried repeating our bed time routine, but she just doesn't go for it, as soon as I walk out of the bedroom she starts to cry.

lifeinagoldfishbowl, a couple of minutes would be bliss! She will sometimes sleep in my arms, but that takes about 25 mins of shushing and jiggling.

DD has three naps most days, sometimes four if we're out in the car. Would you put her in the cot for all of those, or set a target of one a day for now (presumably keeping to the same one, IYSWIM)?

I'd put in the cot for every nap to get her accustomed quicker.

Blimey. Better brace myself for a week of being housebound with a crying baby.

If you'd rather just concentrate on the biggest nap she tends to have being in the cot. It might make it easier to bear

Would you be happy for her to sleep in her pram in the house? My DD is 19 months and has gone through phases of resisting naps in the cot - particularly when she learned to sit herself up and to stand up. At these points I could put her in her pram in her (darkened) bedroom and she would sleep quite happily.

It always felt to me like a lazy solution, but it was a solution nonetheless.

I have noooo idea, skippingturtle. Mine are 4.7 (no naps any more) and 21 months (1 nap at lunchtime). Neither ever had naps in cots. DS used to kip on my tummy/chest (when I only had one and had the time to do that!). DD falls asleep in her buggy/in the car. I feel fortunate that she will transfer from car to buggy and continue to sleep, but have never managed the cot thing

Hope you find something that works for you.

Typing blurry eyed, having been up since 5.30, as night time sleep is now going to pot .

Nope, she won't sleep in her pram unless it's moving. Same with the car seat, as soon as it's lifted out of the car she wakes up. She will sleep in the swing, but is about to grow out of it, and the sling if I'm actually walking. Pottering around the house doing dishes etc whilst wearing the sling is no good.

I'm so tired today, pounding the pavements was nice during the summer, but now it's winter and I'm knackered because she's not sleeping at night I have to get this sorted.

Watching this thread with interest as my DD sounds EXACTLY the same as skippingturtle's. Persevering with cot naps has meant hardly any nap as a result. If she's not in the (moving) pram, she needs to be fed to sleep and it's very hard to then get her off the boob. She'll unlatch - or let me unlatch her - overnight, however.

Have tried all the things mentioned above with limited and dwindling success. But will try other things.

about the night time sleep, skippingturtle

I would second what others have said. Big difference for me came when I started putting DD in her sleepsuit and sleeping bag for daytime naps too. Also the most blacked out room possible. Good luck. Since I did this DD has slept every afternoon for 2 hours and she's now 2.10. Mind you she never sleeps in the pushchair or car!!!

My DS is the same, nearly 18 weeks. I usually have to feed him to sleep, once he looks completely asleep I either put him in his vibrating bouncy chair or on my bed, sometimes takes a few goes but he usually has a 30-40 min nap.

He is also waking up ALOT at night now, after going 5-6 hours his biggest block is now about 2 hours assuming its a growth spurt and hopes it ends soon!

We have had the same and he is now almost a year! We are just trying our best and as he is older doing a bit of controlled crying / pick up - put down. It is really hard.

Glad I found this thread - was about to post on same subject!

10 week old DD will sleep in pram (either moving or in our hallway) but will not sleep in moses basket at all during the day (no problems at night - touch wood).

She is now getting too big for either the pram or basket and we're thinking about moving her to the cot at night. Would love her to also have day time naps in her cot (we have to creep around the house). Need to think of strategies to make it work. Will make sure room is dark as possible and follow some of night time routine as suggested.

Any other ideas/suggestions gratefully received!

My DCs (now 6yo and 2yo) never got round to napping regularly in their cots. Sometimes absolute exhaustion drove them to it (they were too tired to resist), but mostly they battled and screamed and would spend hours not sleeping in their cot.

I gave up in the end and decided to just enjoy them as much as possible, and if that meant cuddly naps on my lap - so be it.

Ah, cuddly naps would be a lovely thing, but DD doesn't like being cuddled unless she's siting bolt upright...

Bless her - I've got an image of her sat on your lap determinedly upright "Don't tempt me with reclining snuggles you wicked mummy, I will not give in and sleep"...

That's about right! She was never a snuggly baby, I laugh at suggestions of co-sleeping, she would hate it!
Bless her, she has reflux, she's not just unsociable (although I'm sure that's part of it ).

For both of mine it was all about timing. When I realised that routines were a tempty carrot of evil on a hiding to nothing (for us anyway) I just started watching my DCs and trying to identify that moment when they were not quite asleep but past the point of no return, and then put them in the cot with lots of soothing. There were a lot of objections, but got there in the end!

Also found it helped to make friends with the cot at other times - sit them in it and look at a book together, play peekaboo with them in the cot, potter around in their bedroom singing a song while they were in the cot. Even if it's just 60 seconds at first, it all helps to give them the message that this is a safe place to be and they are not being abandoned! Good luck, it is really hard I know.

Agree with willyoudothedamnedfanjo, timing is really important. If I miss sleepy signs then that can ruin things for the rest of the day. My DD needs to nap between 1.5- hours after wakening. Here is our routine to give you an idea...actual times dont seem to matter...

6.30am - breastfeed, nappy change, porridge, playtime

8/8.30am - breastfeed, nap

9.30/10.30am - nappy change, get dressed, breastfeed, playtime

12/1pm - nappy change, lunch, breastfeed, nap

The actual times vary most days - eg. yesterday my DD slept till 8am, but today she was up at 6am. BUT...I always offer her a breastfeed roughly an hour and half after her wakening as this seems to be when she is getting sleepy. I used to miss this and this resulted in NO naps at all and a very cranky baby

If my DD is rubbing her eyes, yawning etc but will not feed, I still put her in her cot...somtimes this works, sometimes she screams, but the more I do it the more it works so I would persevere.

To put your mind at ease a little, my DD has not always napped. When she was younger she would sometimes not nap at all throughout the day.

I have ALWAYS tried to put my DD down in her cot for a nap (or moses basket when she was younger It is best to do it when they are slightly awake so that they learn to self settle but TBH most of the time my DD falls asleep while feeding and I am happy with this for now (she is 7 months)

Thanks ladies, glad to hear it's a common problem! It's something they don't tell you about when you're expecting, isn't it, I had NO IDEA that a baby might not sleep when it's tired!

Have had two successful naps on a beanbag today, so whilst it's not quite the cot at least it's an improvement on needing to be pounding the pavements with the pram.

Well done on the beanbag naps, skippingturtle!

I like the idea of "making friends with the cot" too - think I'll start doing a bit more of that....

Oh OP I really feel for you. I wish there was some advice I could give you, but sadly there is none. This is because my 11 month old WILL. NOT. NAP. IN. HIS. COT. Never has done. In the springtime when he was about the same age as yours is now I just gave up and took him out for a nap every day after lunch and walked him around until he slept. Now it's 5 degrees where I live and it's raining and I'm on day two of trying to get him to go down indoors. Today we had one hour of screaming and me running up and down the stairs to comfort him followed by a breast feed and a cuddle and 10 minutes of napping. AGHHhhggghhhhgggghhhh.....
Anyway, what I'm really trying to say is good luck and persevere. It'll be worth it six months down the line I promise.