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Help with gradual retreat method for 4 month old

1 reply

lauralew · 20/09/2010 10:14

I really need help teaching my DS to sleep. Until about 15 weeks he was an ok ish sleeper at night. Was often able to self settle at bedtime (7pm) but mostly went off with dummy and a shush and a pat from me. He would generally have a 5-6 hour stretch and then wake for a feed, go straight to sleep for another 3-4 hours before another feed and then often wake early 5:30- 6:30.

He is a useless daytime napper- will go off after lots of protest, with dummy, shush and a pat but for only 30-45mins.

At 15 weeks it all got a lot worse. He is now 20 weeks. He doesn't have a long stretch of sleep, wakes at different times every night, often upto 6 times and is sometimes awake for more than 2 hours!

I started a strict bedtime routine and gradual retreat a week ago and it is working well at bedtime, no dummy needed, goes off to sleep within 10-20 mins with me now sitting by the cot, no touching but singing and shushing etc but night wakings are no better and he won't go back to sleep unless fed or occassionally with a shush pat and a long lapse of time.

Has anyone done gradual retreat, should I be strictly sticking to same stage at nap times and night wakings?? even if it involves sceaming, which it will, or progess through stages at bedtime and just do whatever necessary to get to sleep at night?? I am trying to stick to feeding at regular times and intervals ie, 12 and 3-4 ish. HELP I'm shattered!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
babber · 20/09/2010 13:41

i am by no means an expert but 4mo seems quite early imo to have such high expectations... maybe he is hungry when he wakes at night?
also, isn't there a developmentl point at around 4mo where even previuosly 'good' sleepers start to wake at night as they've got so much going on it their little heads...
personally i would just do whatever it takes for him to sleep at night - to make life easier for yourself - they change so much from week to week at that age, he could be doing something completely different by next week and you'll be feeling competely ragged from trying to enforce a routine he is not having any of!
having said that my ds is 20mo and has only just reliably stared sleeping through so you will probably want to disregard everything i've said Grin
good luck though - its horrible being so tired...

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