OK, this is silly now. DD is asleep on the sofa, having had a nap for the last 90 mins or so. She should be in bed, shouldn't she?

[Rockbird]

So where do I start? If I wake her now she'll be unbearable and she hasn't had any tea and no teeth brushed etc so can't take her up to bed (she'd wake anyway), so I leave her.

Her typical pattern is wake at 7.30am (ish), nap from about 4.30pm-5 until up to 7 and then bed at about 9.30pm.

I know this is all to cock and probably because we've never set proper bedtimes IYSWIM. But looking at the clock now it's absurd that she's asleep on the sofa when she should be in bed. Looking at those times above it looks awful. Help!

She's 2.7 btw.

Well I dont think the times look awful. Do you think if you just accepted it and let it go then you would all be happier or is it something you really want to change (rather than just feel you should iyswim)?

PS as a comparison at that age ds would go to bed about 8/830, up at 5-630 and nap 1030-12 ish.

Hmm. DD wakes up at 7.30-8 and has a nap at 2pm for 2 hours and the goes to bed at 9pm.

Why is she having her nap so late?

I guess I feel I should change it. I look on Facebook (yes, I know...!) and it's full of everyone saying 6.30, kids in bed, wine o'clock and that sort of thing. I don't drink wine so am not desperate for a drink or anything (!) but it seems all wrong. Other children seem to nap after lunch.

DS is 2 and wakes at 6.30, 20min nap after lunch then in bed around 7pm.

But different strokes for different folks, your routine is only a problem if it is inconvenient for you and or your DC.

My dd of nearly the same age wakes up at any time between 5.30 and 6.30, naps at any point from 12-4 of about an hour and then goes to bed at about 7.30-8pm.

Does she fall asleep earlier if she was in the buggy/car etc? Does he fall asleep in front of the telly - can you do that earlier maybe?

Otherwise I agree with TheUnmentioned.

As she's 2.7 I would just drop the nap. Give her lunch a bit earlier feed her at 4pm then bath and bed as late as you can stretch it. Will take a couple of weeks of her being grumpy at the new bedtime but then it will be done.

No particular reason winny, she just doesn't sleep or seem tired before then. For a while she dropped the nap completely unless in the car, nursery were always complaining about her keeping the others awake! Now she seems to need it again. I'm not so fussed on the bedtime, but feel she should be napping earlier.

I seem to have answered lots of posts there :)

Ds is 3y7m now and is in bed asleep by 7pm because he dropped his nap, your time will come

If I have learnt one thing about parenting it is forget what everyone else is / isnt doing and do what suits you and your family. I bet all those people on facebook have kids up at 5am too but just dont post that! I find a lot of people are often quite smug (or am I just bitter!) about 'kids in bed asleep, takeaway on the way - bliss' type status updates.

Its only bad if you are not happy with the schedule iyswim.

If it works for her/you then thats all that matters

When she starts nursery/preschool etc she will be more tired and will probably start going to bed earlier anyway...

DD also 2.7 is in bed early but does not sleep/nap in the day anymore and as I am a LP if I had her up any later I would kill her go mad!!

I'm glad it doesn't look too horrendous to anyone else, and I do take the point about not comparing to other people, I don't usually. It's just that when your small child is napping on the sofa when others are tucked up for the night, that bad mother feeling starts to come over you

I will try to do something about the nap time though, no wonder she hates going to bed!

Well my ds2, who is almost two, wakes about 8am, nap around 4pm till 5.30/6pm then up til 10pm! It would be great if he dropped his nap, but I know he still needs it and don't want to force him to change. Ds1, now four, was just the same til he dropped his nap age three. I wouldn't worry about it, unless it really bothers you. don't worry about what other people are doing! Ds1 now sleeps 7 til 7, so I know the same will happen with ds2 eventually.

If I was you I would give her an early tea (4.30), then let her watch a bit of telly if she is v tired. Then if she's falling asleep, give her a quick bath and story and get her in bed by 6.30.

When my DD started nursery school she had dropped her nap but was shattered by 4ish. We did the above and it seemed to work fine for us.

Thanks all :) I really did think every other toddler in the land was tucked up in their own bed by half six. I thought I'd missed the good bedtime chapter in the manual

DD is 2.7 and wakes up 6-7am, in bed 7-7.30pm and asleep by 8pm. She dropped her daytime nap about 17months, except for the odd time in the car/buggy.

DS is 1.9 and wakes 6-7am, has an hour nap somewhere between 10am and 3pm, in bed 7-7.30pm and asleep five mins after he's in bed.

IME it all depends on the child how much/little sleep they need and if you're happy with her routine then I'd leave her.

If you want her to go to bed earlier try keeping her awake til 7pm then put her to bed. But remember she might wake up earlier, and be grumpy for a week or two around the time she usually has a nap.

i would say you're probab ly in a minority with nap times etc, but if you are happy with it then there is no need to change

a friend of mine has kids who are exactly the same. they've always napped late, eaten late and gone to bed late.

they're fine! so stop fretting, and only change if you or she wants to change

My dd gave up napping at 13 months. She goes to bed between 9 and 10pm usually and is up between 8.30 and 9.20am. It suits her. She's 3.4 and it will have to change when she starts pre-school in a few weeks but she's happy, I'm happy. I too marvel at the 7pm bed-timers detailed on fb.