AM I CAUSING DS'S SLEEP PROBLEM BY EXCLUSIVE BREAST FEEDING?

[softasshite]

i need some advice!

my 9 month old ds wakes at least 3 times every night and screams until i bf him back to sleep. i often stick him on the boob as soon as i hear him wake because i don't want him to wake my 2 year old (who's always been a decent sleeper) or my hates-being-woken-up dh.

in the day my little one breast feeds every 4 hours and totally refuses to take a milk feed from a cup/bottle. incidentally, he also hates being spoon fed but eats finger foods well and sips water from a tommee tippee. he's also always refused a dummy. i didn't have any of these problems with my daughter who took a dummy, slept pretty well and only needed one night feed from about 4 months until she slept through at 11 months.

i'm really concerned that my worry about waking up the rest of the family, plus his reliance on boobs has basically turned me into a walking dummy.

any advice welcome!

Get your DH/DP to get up in the night with him. controlled crying for a while and amazingly, wee man will settle back down without boobage.

Your DD will cope - try starting on a friday night so everyone can have a nap in the afternoons if tired.

Your ds sounds a lot like mine (although he will accept the spoon - I am doing a mix of BLW and spoon feeding. I've never tried a bottle as I didn't want another thing to have to deal with) and I do a similar thing (ie putting bub straight on the breast when he wakes) to avoid waking my hubby and our neighbours next door in our apartment block.

I am at the point of needing to do something too. We've just come back from a long w/e break so I am going to let him re-adjust and then I am planning to try and cut out the 2-4am feed (still giving him one around my bed time and another early morning) by not feeding him and just consoling him back to sleep. Our bub is in our room so when the time comes, I have suggested to hubby that he sleep in the lounge and wear ear plugs and I also plan to let the neighbours know....I am not big on the whole cry-it-out/controlled crying etc thing (when he was 3 months old I would pick him up when he cried and put him down when he stopped until he finally went to sleep in his cot and that sorted out his naps - but never say never!). My intention is to just stay with him and sing to him until he goes back to sleep as during the day he is able to fall asleep by himself in his cot at nap times after I sing him a little song and then leave the room (it's a book or a book and song for bedtime currently). But if it doesn't work I'll have to try something more drastic if I can commit to it...otherwise I am just going to have to hope he changes. Shongolo makes a good suggestion to start on a Friday night so perhaps this Friday night will be the night!

thanks for your ideas shongololo, yes i think this friday might be a go! i'm going to give it a go myself before i ask dh to do it, he can be my back up plan if i can't sort it. you're dead right, my dd will cope and if she gets woken up at night she usually lies in a bit later in the mornign anyway :)

you have my sympathies MACattack as you're probably shattered (like me)! let us know how you get on.

i have been shortening the night feeds recently so DS is still awake when the milk stops. he is showing signs of learning that its time to sleep once milk has finished, although we get some screaming before he eventually drops off.