Reassure me about leaving DD to cry for her nap this morning?

[Thandeka]

DD (6months) is ASLEEP in her hammock without being bounced! Normally it is 20mins of bouncing and hairdryer going and she crys a bit before going off to sleep. This morning I have lots on (so really shouldn't be posting this but waiting for the washing to finish) as we are in the middle of moving house and landlord inspection tonight, so really couldn't bounce her for that time.

She cried a bit (maybe a bit more than being bounced but never sustained hysteria obv would have rescued her) but was asleep in 20mins as usual (also had hairdryer playing on ipod).

I always thought I would be one of those parents who never left their babies to cry not wanting to harm their brain development etc. But DD is sooooo labour intensive for sleep (daytime naps have to be in baby hammock or out in pram, bedtime is boob but then wakes as soon as I move her to cot where she rolls over gets hysterical and cycle starts again until she doesn't wake when I move her back to her cot, or give up and bounce her in the hammock!

Anyhow reassure me I haven't just damaged her by leaving her for those 20mins!

You really haven't. Both my dses were criers at nap time. Ds1 in particular would cry LONGER if you tried to cuddle him, rock him or otherwise try to soothe him. Didn't take to a dummy or any other type of comforter. But leave him in a dark room for 10 mins and he would cry himself down to sleep.

If I'm honest, I still feel a bit guilty. But that really was the only way he would sleep. And he's a perfectly secure and happy 9 year old now

That makes me feel a lot better! DD won't take a dummy either. And not that I mind being a human dummy at all- its just the boob is only working half the time now!

Of course you haven't damaged her.

Some babies just take a bit of time to drop off and some will cry whatever you do or don't do- as you've found out.

Maybe she will do better being left to get on with it.

DS2 certainly did. If I rocked / cuddled etc it could go on for hours, literally, but if I left him to it he would bellow heartily for 5 mins max then be asleep.

He's now 21 months and has slept like a dream since about 8 months, so no noticeable harm done here

wooo hoo! After all your reassurance I tried it again with her lunchtime nap. It took 18mins and lots less crying this time- more chunters really. So since it took (at least) 20mins of me bouncing then this is much easier!

Will keep going then as it seems to be working! Once I have got her napping happily in her hammock I may attempt to get her to nap in her cot... oooh and then may even get her to fall asleep at bedtime without the boob (Thandeka is possibly overambitious after a mornings sucess!)

Any kind of rocking/cuddling/singing when I put my lo down for naps/ bedtime overstimulates her and really draws out the whole process. She really needed a story/ v.quick cuddle/ lay down it cot/ a kiss and me to leave the room. She would have a little wind down winge and then settle off. In my opinion it is not our job to get our little ones to sleep it our job to make sure they are clean and dry and have the right safe environment for them to be able to fall asleep in themselves.

I find now that I need to rock/boob my DS to sleep if he's overtired or teething. But if he's happy he'll go to sleep all by himself with a bit of babbling...

Great that she's doing it alone - as you say MUCH easier

It's fine. Carry on!

Glad it went so well. Long may it continue!

well last night 10mins and fast asleep- so thats FOUR times in one day putting herself to sleep. (In the last 4/5 months there has only been about 4 occasions of her doing this!) She wasn't great overnight but it's a huge improvement!

Just putting her down for this mornings nap so will see if success is repeated today. Once I have her falling asleep by herself will work on getting her to do that in the night too. (tried last night but her chunterings were keeping the house and neighbours awake and at least boob is silent!)

Fantastic - it sounds like she's really turning a corner!

There's a theory that some babies need to cry for a few minutes to release tension and go to sleep: see here. It sounds as if your DD is one of them.

I'm just jealous, frankly.

Sorry for the hijack!

thandeka that's great. I've been experimenting turning down our monitor just a little bit so I'm not immediately woken by DS and he's had a little moan then drifted off again after a few minutes..!

Yes thanks, despite spending it driving to Devon with a baby who doesn't like car naps. I'm now trying to recover some sort of sanity after a week of haywire holiday naps (or lack of).

Have you had your birthday yet?

Sorry for hijack too!

Thandeka, I'm still jealous.

Oh AngelDog am in the same boat!
DS is five months and woke at 3am this morning (is morning where I am) and after an hour of cuddling him, trying to feed him, soothing him I was wat my wits end - DP got up, took him off me and put him in his cot. We stood next to it and for a good 15 mins he crie d(I cried too) but then he nodded off and slept til 630am which is a huge sleep in for him as he is a 445am riser... I felt terrible and came on here to post about it, but hearing that things are wrking fr yu makes me feel much better! I guess sometimes there is nothing you can do...

Sorry, just realised OP was Thandeka... sleep deprivation obv affecting brain..