Please help me - 4.5mth old

[FourLittleDucks]

DD4 is a settled happy baby, goes 3-4hrs between feeds during day. At night, however, is still up every 3hrs. I've tried various things over the weeks (stringing her out with a dummy etc, settling her without milk) and for a while I got her down to one milk feed between 10 and 7am, but now she is back to 2 feeds.
She is a good size and there seems no reason why she's up so much. I'd be happy with her being up once, but twice between 10 and morning is too much, and I'm finding myself increasingly unable to cope with the other DDs during the day.

Gave some baby rice yesterday tea time, she took a far bit and seemed happy enough.

Please, somebody, give me some hope that this will change soon (please don't say its the 4 mth regression thing - she's not regressed, just not progressed !!)

For the sake of my other DDs I need a little bit more sleep ! three hours at a time isn't enough

I suspect you know what I'm going to say. 4.5 months old is just so little and 2 feeds over a 9hr period is not that much. But with 3 other dds, I appreciate that you are probably on your knees.

Baby rice does not have the same calorie content of milk and if your little girl is telling you she needs the calories (especially at this time which is growth spurt time), then milk is what you should be giving until around 6 months.

I always recommend like the broken record that I am, that you do what makes life easier for you, rather than interfering with the needs of a baby. It's less stressful and we are better able to adapt to change than refusing nutrition to a baby that may well need it.

Co-sleeping, as much help as possible during the day so you can have a break/nap, going to bed when the baby goes to bed, expressing milk for night feeds (if you're bfing, wasn't sure) etc.

I agree with everything OR says. It does sound like it could be developmental - 'regression' isn't actually a good word as it suggests backward progress. It's actually just a period when babies wake more often and/or find it harder to go to sleep.

My 6 m.o. DS's sleep has been messed up a lot by developmental changes eg learning to roll / sit up - up to 4 wakings a night (but he's never been that good at sleeping for long periods).

Giving baby rice may well fill space in her stomach which is needed for food, causing her to lose out on valuable nutrition. Breastmilk is far more calorific, fatty and filling than any food you can give before 6 months.

Sorry, I meant to add that I hope you find a way to cope soon. I can't imagine how difficult it must be with 3 other children.