Nap extending - any tips...going slowly mad

[littlemissindecisive]

DS 16weeks used to sleep lots in the day and only wake once or twice at night. It was great.

For the past 3to4 weeks he's up every couple of hours and does the dreaded 45min nap two or three times a day. I thought it was a growth spurt keeping him awake but now i'm convinced its due to his lack of daytime sleep.

I went in his room before and sure enough he woke after 45min - i spent 20 mins patting him, with a white noise machine on. No luck. He's now all grumpy and restless and tired. I feel like crying i'm so worn out and taking it out on other kids now.

It may well be a phase but's already gone on a month.....

teandcake i know what you mean about it creating sleep associations, but i just want him to have one good nap in the day and if the others are short then that's fine. If it makes him sleep better at night then I'll deal with it later. My kids have all be so restless and rubbish at night if they don't get good daytime sleep. Hopefully he'll not resist sleep so much or be so wired that as time goes on he'll not need me. PLus once they start rolling, crawling, crusing they should be shattered!!

DS1 did the same and did eventually grow out of it and has great afternoon naps still at 2.5yrs (he's up with the larks though!)

Mine always slept worse at night if they didn't sleep well in the day. That is true. I do see where you're coming from

I'm sure I'll solve one problem, create another, then be back on here moaning and seeking advice

I worry that helping DD through the cycle change is forming bad habits, too -- I now have to nurse my daughter to sleep for every nap, and I lie with her till we're through the first sleep cycle. But she used to sleep in my arms, so this is actually an improvement. I'm hoping by getting her in the habit of taking long naps she'll expect it. I think if she's used to short naps she won't resettle herself but if she gets accustomed to a long nap when the cycle change comes she'll feel a need to keep sleeping.

littlemiss - dummy cold turkey wasn't much fun (and we were weaning off the swaddle too..) but he seems to have forgotten it now and we have had some better nights. So perhaps it's working? Who knows? No doubt it'll all go to shit again soon! Good luck if you decide to do it.

Teapot - sleep books e.g. Millpond, No-Cry Nap Solution say that consistently helping your DC through the cycle change is the way to teach them to take longer naps without your help.

Suchanamateur, glad you're all surviving!

Well, I more or less did the routine yesterday, including giving some baby rice early evening. Baby was settled at 7ish and did not wake till 2.30am. This may not sound like much, but he was not settling till 10pm and then was waking at 2 for a feed. I thought, though that, having had such a good feed at 2am (I was about to pop!) that he may sleep till 7am. He woke for another feed at 5am though and still insisted on having both sides.

asimum have you tried a dreamfeed aroind 10.30/11pm?

Sunchanamateur great news about the dummy! I'm using it less and less so trying that way for now. DS only has it for daytime naps if all else fails.

dd2 was like this, she would have 3 or 4 short naps per day at this age, although occasionally just to confuse me she would chuck in a random long one making me rack my brains to see what was different about that nap and could it be repeated...the answer was usually no . there were times when she didn't seem to have had enough sleep but but there didn't seem to be alot I could do about it-other than take her for a walk if she was really tired and upset.

as she got a bit older she dropped to 3 45min naps per day and it wasn't until after she was weaned that she actually started to have longer naps though it was still fairly random. She is 16m now and still keeps me guessing though can sleep for up to 3 hours at a stretch if she just has one nap...

I have never tried the dream feed and have never woken my children from their sleep - just because I am so grateful that they are asleep and can imagine them not going back down again. Worse would be if I did a dream feed and then he woke at 2 anyway! Would you recommend it? Also, I am usually so shattered that I generally go to bed between 9 and 10. I suppose that would change if I wasn't up at 2am! Little boy took a 90 minute nap at lunch today which is unheard of but house is quiet today because big sis is at a friends house.

I kept a dreamfeed for both my 2 DCs at 10 or 11pm (whenever I was heading off to bed) right up to about 10 months when they no longer wanted it. It definitely helped my 2 DCs and if I lifted them gently and fed them quietly, they often didn't even wake properely in the dark room and would suck away sleepily. IYSWIM?

Thanks teaandcakeplease. Am still trying to settle him though at 9.30pm. Seems to have no interest in sleeping but also won't be put down.

Ahhhh well if his final feed is 9.30pm and you're not able to get him to settle at 7pm right now, then you don't really want to try and feed him again a short while later, you want a glass of wine and a rest

You poor thing, I remember my DS not settling easily at night found it very hard - this too shall pass

Introduce a dream feed when he begins to settle at 7pm, then feed him at 10 or 11pm (whenever suits). For now carry on as is imo

Well I'm just jeallous. My 6mo will sleep for 2 naps of 30 mins each if i'm lucky. I'd kill for 3 naps of 45 mins. Just imagine what i could get done!

Well, last night just turned out to be a nightmare. He didn't settle till 10.45, then woke again at 11.30, then again at 1.30 at which time I gave up looking at the clock and fed him in bed till the morning. I don't know what I am running on today... Could do with a large glass of wine.

Asimum

Tomorrow is another day, try to keep him in the same routine tomorrow that works for you, whether a sleep every 90 mins to 2 hours or Rachel Waddilove's nap routine. Sometimes they do sleep worse when overtired and wake more. Perhaps he's not ready for Rachel's routine? And he needs naps every 90 mins to 2 hours? My 2 DCs slept far worse and were harder to settle once over tired? If they're 4 and a half months it sure can't be colic

What kind of bedtime routine do you do? Do you always co-sleep? I'm trying to get a feel for what to suggest you see.

Also this book I found very helpful for my 2 DCs I didn't use his sleep training method, I used PUPD but all his advice is so true. Hard to read in places but worth the effort.

I agree that, from experience with my other one, they are harder to settle when over tired. Bedtime, we do the bath at 6, baby rice by 6.30 and then bed at 7ish, same as big sis. I have generally settled him with a feed but try hard not to co-sleep during night time feeds. I find we both sleep better that way.
I dont' know if it is a coinsidence but he really moved around alot today and sat up in his bouncer for the first time so there could be something in that sleep regression thing. As you say, tomorrow is another day.
What troubles me is that he is not really getting into a routine because we are busy with activities for big sis.
Thanks for the help.

What is PUPD?

Yes developmental milestones can impact sleep sometimes. Baby rice already? Serious faux pas to confess on mumsnet

My son was introduced to a few solids early as well but only a couple of spoonfuls a day the rest was all milk.

I'm sure tomorrow will be a better day but you do need to make sure he somehow gets enough sleep in the day. As my 2 are 17 months apart, I've been lucky with no school run or anything else really to work into my son's day. It also means though that I am officially out of my depth on advice, but I tried my hardest to keep my son to a good routine where possible ands it paid off.

Pick up put down sleep training method from the Baby Whisperer. Very gentle form of sleep training, unlike others.