Please can we get your views on this parenting research for Radio Leeds

[GeraldineMumsnet]

Research by Institute of Education, funded by the govt, reported by DM here.

First three pars to give you the flavour

Children are more likely to grow into well-adjusted adults if their parents are firm disciplinarians, academics claimed yesterday.

Traditional 'authoritative' parenting, combining high expectations of behaviour with warmth and sensitivity, leads to more 'competent' children.

It is particularly important for girls, who can suffer from a lack of confidence and may turn to drugs if care is merely adequate, said researchers from London's Institute of Education, a body widely viewed as Left-wing.

Any thoughts? And if you count yourself as a 'strict' parent, what sanctions are you using if you think you kids are misbehaving?

Thanks in advance
MNHQ

bump

Mothers who breastfeed for at least six months have a "better" relationship with their child.

Well, no controversary there! Can't believe it came from the DM of all places, though.

I am trying to Google for something more tangible about the supposed meta study done by Gutman at all. The language in the DM piece is all so unspecific and wishy washy, comparing 'authoratitive' with 'mediocre' parents, when it's unclear how the groups were categorised as such. You can't say anything from that.

Couldn't agree with this sentence more...

"Traditional 'authoritative' parenting, combining high expectations of behaviour with warmth and sensitivity, leads to more 'competent' children"

thanks mloo (and memoo). I'm trying to find the original research too, no luck so far.

I whip my children and then lock them in the underground air raid shelter at the foot of my garden. They rarely make the same mistake twice.

Seriously though, I can understand what they are saying. I think with that kind of parenting, the child knows where they stand and they learn about boundaries and how to live in a world which has rules. If you come out of a wishy-washy kind of childhood with no clear rules, you are (I would imagine) going to find the real world a nasty shock and learning to function with the rules society set will be difficult.

While I think it's important for children to learn that there are boundaries, that actions have consequences and that other people's feelings, wishes and rights matter too, this article is a load of vague subjective wank that is bound to be jumped on by the sort of unhealthy people who want to bring back corporal punishment in schools and think that women should Know Their Place.

Thanks to all. We've been stood down, but thanks for your contributions and sorry if it took up valuable MNetting time!

High expectations are very good, IMO. We have higher expectations for our children (DSS1 - 13, DSS2 - 11, DD - 4) than DP's exW has and DSS1 and DSS2 know it and behave much better chez nous than chez elle.

And we have to resort to sanctions far less often than exW does - because behaviour doesn't degenerate in this household to the extent it does at hers.

So I think you can have high expectations without having to be strict or to punish. For the DSSs, DP's disappointment is usually punishment enough.

I agree with memoo's post.

High expectations for behaviour help me and dh to function and we're united on discipline. So far it's helping us teach our son what is acceptable and where certain behaviour is acceptable/unacceptable (quiet in library and noisy in softplay, jumping around loudly in our home OK but not in busy supermarket)

Being tough and saying NO from early age makes things a lot easier in the long run. I hope!

I only skimmed article. Some waffle there too.

Oh, the 'warmth adn sensitivity' aspect I agree with too.

I try not to stay cross for too long especially after they've calmed down, apologised etc. Need cuddles, hugs, kisses and lots of simple explanations then. Repeat ad infinitum....