Mumnets people how about an 'Ectopic pregnancy' board?

[memoo]

I know we have one for Miscarriage but as a women who has had an ectopic pregnancy I do often feel that the miscarriage board isn't the right place to post. there are a lot of issues relating to ectopics that don't apply to women who have had a miscarriage. For many women who have an ectopic pregnancy there is damaged caused that can hinder future conception, I for example lost a fallopian tube and my other one was damaged meaning that I will find it very hard to get pregnant again. I could write a big list of issues relating to ectopic pregnancy but don't want to waffle!

I agree with whoever said 'support, where support is necessary and direct to the professionals when necessary!

It is quite sad to see so many of us have suffered eps, but since we all have experience of them, we can continue to support and share and hug whenever we are called upon, under whichever topic it is in. I seem to have a knack of snifiing out a ep thread whereever it is!

blimey, this has got quite heated.

Gsmum, im sorry if I offended you with what I said. however all i meant by it was that after having had so many miscarriages (3 by the time i had my ep and 4 since) the emotions that i felt about my ep were very different. this, to me was a baby. with a heartbeat and just bad luck and signing those forms was one of the hardst things ive had to do. i actually tried to get off the bed on the way to theatre twice because i knew what was about to happen. however i am aware that he/she would have been very unlikely to survive, and would always point in the direction of a specialist. just wanted to clear that up.

btw totally agree that a pg loss title would be much more appropriate. i often felt that my feelings about my ep didnt it in with the mc threads.

I haven't had an ectopic pregnancy, so hope it is ok for me to voice an opinion on this.

I've had a 'straightforward' miscarriage and a molar pregnancy, and whilst my emotions surrounding the experiences were pretty much the same, my needs after the molar pregnancy were very different, and I should imagine this is similar to a lot of women who have experienced an ectopic pregnancy (please correct me if I'm making a huge sweeping statement there!)

I found it fairly easy to talk about my 1st miscarriage, and also was surprised by how many people had had a similar experience. I have only ever met one person who has had a molar pregnancy, and found it hard to even explain to people what I had experienced.

I agree that there should be a preg loss board which is not 'exclusive', and should also cover ''more voluntary' terminations'.

well of course, hazey, in fact it was hab's thread that made me think that the misc/bereavement topic barely scratched the surface of all of our losses, and then memoo posted this thread and i got a chance to say.

the concern that i have about even naming the types of losses is that i'd not want someone to feel excluded because they had experienced something particularly rare. does anyone have any thoughts about that?

i know that i would never as a new poster have posted in a misc/bereavement thread as i was heartsick by that point of me saying 'i just had an ep' and hearing 'oh i had a miscarriage, it was awful but it was okay i've had two kids since'. i'd want to scream 'NOOOOOOOOOOO, you don't understand, everything's under threat for me now AND i've lost the chance to have this baby...'

so... last thing i'd do is post on a misc board in case i heard the same thing. it seems like i'm not alone in that. and yes, maureenmlove, it is awful how many of us have suffered a pg loss, isn't it? with some sensitivity and care i really do feel like a board could include all of us. and you know what? it'd teach people to pause before comparing everything to the more common (and of course dreadfully upsetting) losses.

I think that simply naming a new topic "pregnancy loss" would be sufficient. It says it all really. And I don't think it would exclude women who have had voluntary terminations. The fact is that if a woman feels she needs to post on a thread entitled "pregnancy loss" then she is probably in the right place. (sorry, clumsily put, hopefully you see what I am getting at...)

Hazeyjane, sorry to hear about what you've been through. At the time I had my ep, one of my MN friends was (mistakenly) diagosed with a molar pregnancy and I remember at the time wondering how hard it would be for her to find anyone who had experienced molar pregnancy to talk to, it being so much more rare than ep. Hopefully the change proposed here might help in future.

I think Pregnancy Loss is a very good title. Nobodies feelings and needs and reactions to their loss is going to be the same, but the one common thing is loss. Sadly, there'll always be someone that can identify with an OP.

I have seen another board on another parenting website and it is named simply as pregnancy loss. It works well and there are posts from ladies with all types of pregnancy losses. However, i have never seen a post from a woman after a voluntary termination, so from that im not sure that it would be taken for granted that they are wellcome also on a similar boeard here.

Maybe , if there was a pregnancy loss board here there could be a sticky message stating that women from all types of pregnancy loss, voluntary of involuntary are welcome??

lissielou seriousely my fault- emotions run high alright but as i say i thought that was being stated as fact, now i realise it wasnt. Silly me and apologies.
I feel terrible now, i really would not want to upset anyone, hope i didnt too much.

BTW, just found out today that am pregnant again! Here comes the rollercoaster of bloods etc again!

oh blimey... tentative congrats, at least that's step one of a longer process done. fingers very crossed for you, keep us posted.

gsmom, congratulations, hoping for good things x and dont worry, no need to feel bad

Gsmom, I so pleased for you, i really do hope everything goes well. I know its easier said than done but try to relax and not worry too much, i'm sure everything will be fine.