Suggestion: A not in the spirit of Mumsnet report function

[Bloodyscarymary]

I have noticed that there are a number of deeply unpleasant posters across a lot of threads, people with no interest in supporting an OP with advice or even very strongly held opinions of their own, but rather focused on being goady, insulting and aggressive.

These posters don’t veer into the realm of personal attack but they do shut discussion down and I imagine make OPs who have to experience them less willing to post in the future.

Does there exist a way to report these posters?

And if not, might I suggest a “posts not in the spirit of Mumsnet” report function. One report wouldn’t be enough for mumsnet to take action but perhaps if a user gets say, 20 such reports, then they get a time out from using their account?

Perhaps Mumsnet feels that that these posters keep engagement up because they cause arguments but I think the beauty of the site is cheerful, principled or even heated disagreement and debate whereas these poisonous posters aren’t trying to make a case, they’re just nitpicking and bitter and serve to derail threads or simply silence the OP so other users don’t get anymore updates.

Reddit has the upvote and downvote function where posters like this would just get downvoted until their posts were hidden from view. I think mumsnet needs a way to deal with them too.

I’d add that I started a thread a while ago asking why people just post at the end of a long thread without reading at least the OP’s posts, given how often those posts are pointless, and I got quite a few replies telling me people didn’t want to post on here to ‘engage’ - just to have their say. I’d rather assumed that posting was always with a view to a conversation but it did seem that there are posters who just don’t see any value in that and only want to express their opinion and move on. That quite saddened me and since then I’ve noticed it playing out frequently.

I agree. There a number of posters who get in first and say things like:
Just google it (it’s a discussion board - we could all just ask chat gpt but then there wouldn’t be mumsnet)

or

What did they say when you asked them (when the OP has made it clear they haven’t asked them - passive aggressive arseyness)

Haha I love this idea! Like one of those grey texts in the comment box that disappears when you start to type? Could simply be the message posted above by MNHQ

We'd appreciate it if you could use the same courtesy when posting messages on Talk as you would use when speaking to someone face to face. Please do bear in mind how difficult this parenting business can be, and if there's one thing all of us could do with, it's some moral support.

Yes, there do seem to be more of those now. It baffles me; if they CBA to read what others have written (not even all of the OPs posts) then surely they don’t expect many people to read their post so why bother?

"The Spirit of Mumsnet" includes robust disagreement and frank criticism, calling people out when they are being ridiculous, and telling it like it is. If you want nothing but supportive affirnations, Nethuns is a better site for you. When people do take it too far into personal attack territory, the Report function already exists and it is appropriate to use it if someone vulnerable is on the receiving end of criticism that is too robust

I’ve been reporting ‘nasty’ comments for years. I don’t often check but plenty get deleted even though there is no actual ‘personal attack’ . There are some truly horrible people on this site who seem to get a kick out of deliberately upsetting people. It’s not hard to give different advice or opinions without being nasty. Inheritance threads attract a lot of bitter posters.

I get just as frustrated as anyone when I see threads from women who seem to have passively got themselves into awful situations -3 babies, not married, house in partners name and no job and living with a awful man type of thing but if they are asking for help or advise then it’s not the time to slate them. People who are sharp or snide with them are doing it because they are unpleasant nasty people. They seem to get a kick out of deliberately upsetting people. I report them all the time. I just put ‘other’ and ‘nasty’.

If you actually want to help someone with blunt advice you can still do it kindly, it’s not difficult.

Well this is a bit ironic re: posters who don’t RTFT.

this is quite clearly where people's lines move and don't align.

Some OP, as i said, need the cold hard truth, as do friends in RL. When someone has made a massive cock-up, and then doesn't understand that some reactions are delayed and strong, they need straight words not "oh OP he is so awful"

Or how about a little thumbnail video of Thumper?

It's the Twitter effect, I think. It makes sense there to just 'have your say' without engaging, because platforms like that aren't organised around integrated conversations. In the old days, when MN started, the 'forum' was the archetype for online talk, and people were familiar with speaking in conversations, much as in real life.

But forums and conversations are now old hat. We have trained ourselves just to throw our own input into a chaos of atomised social media pronouncements, like scribbling on a piece of paper and throwing it into a blizzard. A lot of posters don't seem to understand the difference between a forum and other types of social media platforms. For example, MNHQ is often asked for a 'hide poster' option. Although I can see the reason why people might mike this, it doesn't really make sense on a platform that is organised around conversations rather than personally curated (and algorithmically manipulated) timelines.

It’s not a choice between one extreme and another, though. We all know some posts that are beyond the pale get left to stand, just like some posters are plain arseholes and don’t get pulled up on it often enough. Not sure how sneering and Nethuns references add anything constructive to the discussion.

You can report already

Id like this too @Bloodyscarymary.

The shills, troll, GFs and AI post are off the scale atm. There should be a NITS report button.

I'm sure they used to have something like this! If you had a swear word or something in your draft comment then an automatic thing would pop up saying "are you sure you want to post this?"

They either got rid of it, or I've mellowed in recent years lol because I haven't seen it in ages.

(Not that I was ever abusive to the op... for example if the op was describing a horrible person I might have, say, couched a form of words OP might use to tell him to piss off, and the system thought it was me telling a commenter to piss off. It came up in situations like that)

No there is a pretty clear guideline of what is acceptable. Calling someone names and insinuating they are a fraud isn't what you do when someone has a different opinion than you. If you did that in a classroom, or some sort of debate or something, you'd be kicked out.

If you don't know what is acceptable behaviour in public, then perhaps you should limit the amount of time you expect the public to put up with you.

It isnt your job ti decide when you think the OP needs your hard truths that might not even be true, though. If they say they want that, then sure. Very few posts say they do. And again, you need to be certain your truth is the right truth to be that person.

Why does she have to explain what she is doing to remedy HER situation to avoid you all ganging up on her? Can you see the problem there? Youre saying that unless she does what you want her to, she's going to get it from you and others.

There are several posts around the Internet of people saying they were banned for reporting racist and otherwise problematic posts as there is a rule about overreporting.

I assume you’re referring to me. Someone suggested that cars with manual transmissions are no longer being sold. I pointed out that is not the case. I’m surprised to learn that makes me a “goady fucker”.

Theres reporting for that. Its against guidelines. The post will be removed.

This was a thread where someone's partner says they are abusive. I have no idea who is really abusive and who isnt. I was asking questions to establish that to some degree. I dont just assume the woman is the victim, especially when her partner is actually accusing her of being otherwise. You take your view because you assume the woman is the victim and could never be a narcissistic abuser. The man could be a real victim.

Several of these posts remain. If people were routinely punished for them, then they wouldn't be as common.

It's a terrible idea.It would make mumsnet even more of a hive mind than it already is. So many posters regard a post as 'goady' because it doesn't accord with their own world view

I'm always surprised by claims that MN is a "hive mind". What are the viewpoints that get no disagreement whatsoever?

Personally I'd rather give someone the benefit of the doubt and assume they're telling the truth than potentially increase someone's trauma. If I'm not convinced that they're on the level or something doesn't add up for me then I don't post. Frankly, I don't think it's possible to be certain about the truth of a situation based on a few MN posts anyway.

If the man is the real victim then I doubt me establishing that will help him, whereas trying to pick apart an OP who is looking for support may well make things worse for her.