Mumsnetters without Children board

[KimberleyClark]

MN HQ, could you please reconsider your decision not to remove this board from Active? We’ve had yet another invasion of parents telling us we are in denial and trying to convince ourselves.

Well then can we have stronger moderation of the triggered parents derailing our threads? It appears many of us reported one troll but the mods have only deleted the odd comment - she needs to be told to stop trolling us altogether.

I’m not so sure it’s anything to do with an echo chamber (childfree by choice myself) - personally I just find the ‘you’re selfish’/‘you want kids really’ derails so tiresome and they can really get in the way of discussing the relevant topic. I’d be in favour of the threads not appearing in Active myself.

Unfortunately I think that some parents (not many, but there are definitely a few) begrudge childfree people the freedom they themselves have given up, especially if they are finding parenthood hard/experiencing regrets. Labelling the childfree as selfish must make them feel a bit better about their lives, I suppose.

A single comment is not a derail, the threads only get derailed if people take the bait and respond. That thread was quite interesting until people turned it into another battleground and started wailing about needing the board to be taken out of Active. I barely registered the one or two comments from parents, until people started squabbling. Just ignore them. Who cares what some anonymous person on the internet thinks?

Tbf I’ve not seen that specific thread so can’t comment. You’re being rather dismissive of other people’s viewpoints yourself on this thread though, tbf…

Oh no! Someone disagrees with me on the internet!

I'm childfree and never look at that topic because parents insert their irrelevant comments on the threads.

So many people seem to think people are interested to read that they too were 'childfree' until they had a kid and now they like having a kid. Wow. Fascinating 😆

🤷🏻‍♀️

Agree. But it seems HQ won't acknowledge this.

I definitely suspect this.

Why can't HQ just suspend the tiresome people who don't understand that the threads on that board aren't for them?

I've never looked at it or read it but it seems a shame for it to be hidden away from child free people who might be interested.

Quite. But they don't. The latest troll literally said she doesn't want the board to exist and is clearly revelling in trolling, but she's allowed to continue.

Yes. It’s all very well people saying that we’re wailing, squabbling & making a fuss about nothing but that poster’s been very clear about her intentions.

'Triggered by the existence of parents' 😃 If anyone was triggered by the existence of parents they'd spend their entire life in a state of being triggered, Mumsnet would be a drop in the ocean.

And still it continues. @BeckyAMumsnet can something please be done??

@BertieBotts can't you just follow or unfollow the topics you're referring to? Have I misunderstood?

Yes you can but following is a separate thing. I have a few topics on follow so that I get notifications, because I'm interested to read posts in those sections but they have so few posts in them that I would miss them otherwise.

Unless they have changed it, you can't opt in to get notifications on some "following" topics and not others. I don't want to "follow" 90% of the topics on MN and be bombarded with constant notifications. I just want the topics that are totally hidden to be able to appear in Active (if you opt in) which is what used to be possible. I have no idea when exactly it changed.

People who write that they can never love their stepchildren like they love their own children have to accept that can feel like a punch in the stomach to someone who has been a stepchild. It can be very triggering.

Eh? I am not a stepmum and I never will be because I know I will be a shit one. How is that triggering?

It would only be triggering if I actually was a stepmum who hated her stepkids.

I always say, give me one unselfish reason to have children and I will give you five unselfish reasons not to have them.

The only unselfish reason was - to continue the human race. Yeah, I replied, but why you in particular?

Hi all, we've posted on the thread in MNers without children.
https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/childfree-mumsnetters/5351023-anyone-else-sometimes-get-a-wave-of-relief-that-they-dont-have-children?page=5&reply=145039140

I don’t think you can moan about this really. It’s ‘Mumsnet’. Clues in the name. It’s like a meat eater joining a forum for vegans and then moaning when people aren’t happy they’re there 🤷🏻‍♀️

There are countless threads and forums that have nothing to do with children. The litter box, style and beauty, telly addicts, property & DIY...

Being able to opt in, like the SN boards used to work, would solve one part of this (the part where the board becomes tumbleweed central) because people who want to see it can opt in to see it.

And not being aware the board exists in the first place could be easily solved by adding a step when people sign up to ask them which of the optional boards they would like to opt in to view, and/or having a large button or banner somewhere fairly visible like in Active or at the top of the Topics page which makes it clear that people are viewing the default topics list and if they wish they can customise and add extra topics to their Active page.

That’s a great idea.