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MNHQ

Mumsnet Body Image survey

74 replies

CarrieMumsnet · 31/01/2008 12:24

Hi all

For all those who've come here having done the Mumsnet Body image survey, please feel free to share your views on this thread.

For those of you who haven't got a clue what we're talking about, please click here If you need an incentive to click, it's a fun survey on the true cost of motherhood (and we're talking pelvic floors and stretchmarks not expensive buggies) plus you've got the chance to win £250 of Sweaty Betty vouchers.

And once you've completed the surgery you can come back here and talk about how you really feel about designer vaginas

OP posts:

MNHQ

OliviaMumsnet · 13/02/2008 19:56

Hi there
Just to alert you to the media request here.
Thanks
MN Towers

Nymphadora · 13/02/2008 20:09

I spent 6 years single and was in such a state when I started seeing my bf about being naked in front of him and I now feel so much more confident than I ever did pre-kids

PhDlifeNeedsaNewLife · 13/02/2008 20:16

I think having lost my job shortly before I became pg has affected my confidence - including body image - waaaaaaaaaaaaay more than the flub, scar, and stretch-marks. Plus, you know, it's hard to feel hot when you've got mashed banana in your hair

SheikYerbouti · 13/02/2008 20:21

I often cry when I look in the mirror.

I am disgusting

SheikYerbouti · 13/02/2008 20:27

Golly, that sounded really self indulgent and needy didn;t it?

But it's how I feel

DP tells me I have some major ishoos about my appearance. I hate the fact that it takes up a large %age of my day's thoughts, as iurt's an incredibly selfish thing to worry aboiut - I am healthy, ffs. But I would od anything to look different from how I do now. I wish I had the money for surgeruy, but I don;t.

I feel like I let my kids nd my DP down with the way I look as well.

I have never really admitted all this before tbh

PhDlifeNeedsaNewLife · 13/02/2008 20:29

on here you can look like Bo Derek, Sheik

SheikYerbouti · 13/02/2008 20:30

I look more like Bo Selecta

PhDlifeNeedsaNewLife · 13/02/2008 20:34

Habbibu · 13/02/2008 20:36

PhD - have you seen Sheik's picture? She's gorgeous... She says it's an aberration, but the camera doesn't invent a face that pretty.

PhDlifeNeedsaNewLife · 13/02/2008 20:40

Sheik, you need to go get your eyes checked - I just saw your profile and I thought you were beeyootiful. And I'm not just 'being nice' either!

Divastrop · 13/02/2008 20:46

ive just done it,i had a couple of problems though as some of the questions assumed my dh had seen me naked before i had children

dh would have been 14 when i had ds1...

morningpaper · 13/02/2008 20:51

SYB you are REALLY beautiful

I would DEFFO have you

But I understand all your feelings anyway

What I most empathised with on this thread was Mamazon:

"in my less rational mind i want to hack at it all with a bread knife and then hope the NHS will save the day."

I have thought that too .... "Hmm I just need to snip all this off with scissors, I'm sure they could just sew it back up and it would look much better..."

That's why MOTHERS and RECREATIONAL DRUGS must never be allowed to mix...

Divastrop · 13/02/2008 20:51

i have always had issues with body image(i was 'the fat girl' at school),but having a dh 6 years younger than me makes me worry about it even more than i used to,i always feel i have to apologise for the way i look.he tells me all the time that he thinks im beautiful but i dont believe him.

does anybody else have this problem,with not believing your dh/dp when they compliment you on your body?

BecauseImWorthIt · 13/02/2008 20:53

My weight is higher now than since I had children (just about a stone heavier) so I can't blame pregnancy.

But the thing that has surprised me is how my body shape has changed. I seem to be able to carry more weight than before I had the children.

I have always been aware of my body shape, and pregnancy hasn't influenced it. I'm fortunate enough in that 2 vaginal births have had no noticeable effect on my internal shape/size either. No need for extra stitches to make me 'honeymoon fresh' a la Shameless!

My very DH summed it up for me when, after me wailing for the endless time about being fat, he said "you aren't fat, you're just bigger than you want to be"

morningpaper · 13/02/2008 20:55

gosh yes

I mean, I do believe him, I suspect he just sees BREASTS .... ARSE ... OMG IT IS A WOMAN

and the rest of his speech is gratitude

But if it was a choice between my-body-pre-kids and my-body-post-kids - all other things being equal - it is a no-brainer

Annoyingly I have a total fetish for old men with gray hair so the older HE gets, the MORE he grows into my ideal man

Whereas I fear I am on a downward slope away from his ideal laydee

rantinghousewife · 13/02/2008 20:55

Actually having children cured my body issues, (and my body is probably far from perfect but, I've come to the conclusion that life is too short) can't believe how many of you loathe yourselves.
It really makes me want to hack off bits of my self confidence and share it with you all.

Habbibu · 13/02/2008 21:04

I think people think that a good body image can only go with an amazing body. I don't think I've ever had body image problems and am far from perfect. Part of it is that I'm way too lazy to care, plus my lovely mother always tells me I'm pretty, which is nice. But I think one of the useful things that happened to me was getting guttate psoriasis (patches all over my body) at 16 - kind of distracted from the usual fat thighs worry, and then somehow I stopped caring about that too - learned to love it, I suppose.

FrayedKnot · 13/02/2008 21:05

Interesting...

My body image issues have loads more to do with aging and not much to do with motherhood. My body hasn;t changed much post-pregnancy (only one DC though, that may be quite important)...norks seem to hang a bit lower but nothing a push up bra can;t fix...

But it's the wrinkles, and the bingo wings, and the sagging knees...

And the fear of looking exactly like my Mother in 20 years time

Divastrop · 14/02/2008 12:39

habbibu-you hit the nail on the head there for me;your mother always tells you you're pretty,my mother always used to tell me i was fat/put me on diets etc,she has never said anything nice about my appearence!

SheikYerbouti · 14/02/2008 13:38

My mum is a diet saboteur

I will tell her I am desperate to lose wight
she will tun up th next day wit biscuits and say things like "Oh, one wonb;t hurt - you need it" as she knows I won;t juyst eat one

Habbibu · 14/02/2008 13:41

That's a real shame, diva. Mothers are the people who are supposed to see our beauty no matter what. I think my dd is just stunning, and can't imagine ever not seeing her beauty, no matter what.

Sheik - that is a pain in the arse. I wonder why she does it?

SheikYerbouti · 14/02/2008 14:03

No idea hab. Probablyu because she is barking

She has always been the same. I have been a Slimmimg World member since 2206, and she doesn;t know - if I tell her, she will take the pis and do everything to make me fail

I lost 3 stone a few yesr back before having DS1, and she couldn;t bear it

I tell my DSs everydayu that they are gorgeous. DS1 loves it when I say "My, you are looking very handsome today!"

Habbibu · 14/02/2008 14:19

Oh, Sheik - that's such a shame. So nice that your sons know how gorgeous they are (though frankly, they have the genes. How could they not be?). How's SW going?

beansontoast · 14/02/2008 15:00

when i look at celebrity mums...or even other local mums ...who have flat tummies etc i dont think about them in relation to myself necessarily i just think 'that is qquite incredible!amazing!...in an objectve way.

for me age/time has ravaged my body /self image as much as pregancy and birth

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