URGENT Mumsnet needs your opinions for Radio 5 slot tomorrow (sunday) morning

[Carrie (mumsnet)]

Hi there

Just had a call from radio 5 who want us to go on and talk (briefly) about Maragaret Hodges proposals for parents. Main focus of chat is givt saying they will give written guidelines to parents on parenting. Is this a good idea? Would it work? Would you take any notice of it?

Any thoughts anyone.

Need your input before 9.30am tomorrow

Thanks as ever

hold on, let me get upto date. the govt wants to tell us how to parent our kids?

I haven't seen what dear Mrs Hodge is proposing - can you post a link please?

I wouldn't take any notice of it! I know how to parent my own children and I don't need interference from anyone. If I want advice, I'll ask for it and the best places to find it are my Mum, my friends with children and my friends on Mumsnet!

No idea whta they are proposing

anything useful on this thread ?

There is no doubt that some parents need help with parenting - some would welcome it and others might need some convinving they actually need it. I think a careful balance needs to be struck on this - if the govt is too heavy handed and holier than thou it could have the opposite effect to which it is intended and get parent's backs up and the whole thing will be ignored.

No intention of listening to any of it, what makes them think they know best?

This from the party who called SAHMs a 'problem' too. I don't think it would be objective advice aimed to help particular families but more to help the Labour Party achieve its aims.

I'd be very cross if I thought the Government were telling me how to look after my child. Will search for a link though as not really up to date with it. Smacks of Big Brother is watching..

I suppose if people haven't got family or life experience they can turn to then they may need guidance.
Personally I parent my child in the way that suits us and not the govt.

nothing wrong with a free book - I would just see it as similar to the other PG/0 -5 info they currently provide! I think it's a reasonable enough idea. I think I would look at it with interest - but would just see it as a source of info similar to MN, family/friends, other books etc.

HTH

I suspect any government guidelines would be based on a "One size fits all" policy. IRL what works well for one family could be a spectacular failure for another. By all means give parents easy access to parenting advice if they want it but don't go forcing it down our throats.

Hm - FWIW I have always thought it ironic that adoptive parents have to jump through hoops and go through endless assessments while those lucky enough to be able to conceive just go right ahead.

I don't like the Big Brother-ish overtones of the Govt giving written guidelines but think it would be an excellent idea if child benefit was conditional on attendance at parentcraft classes, especially for first child.

Really?? You only get child benefit if you attend parent classes??? How is that not big-brotherish? It's a terrible idea!!

Well in my area no one would get Cb as the parent craft classes were cancelled due to lack of midwives.

going to go against the flow a bit here and say that I think that there is a real need for guidance. i don't necessarily think that this labour govt will get that guidance right but with the disintegration of the extended family, lots of parents have no idea of even the basics (bfding, sterilising properly if bottle feeding, that babies can't be 'spoilt' but tend to be easier if their needs are met etc etc)

i welcome legislation against smacking and don't think the govt have gone far enough in this and have pandered to panic in the red tops about 'nanny state'.

however, what we need far more than 'guidance' is for this govt to take the lead in terms of fair maternity and paternity leave (one year on full pay that can be split in whichever way works for both partners but with a minimum of 12 weeks each). making the choice of whether to be a sahm or a working mum a real choice (payment for staying at home, and subsidised universally available quality childcare) and making the right to ask for flexible working hours a right to actually have flexible working hours.

how is that for starters?

TBH I think until the government has a smooth running child support agency, child tax credit system, well funded NHS etc, they should leave the formal advice giving to midwives and HV. If they want to offer classes then they are welcome to but I doubt people will bother reading written guidelines.

Most parents still rely largely on the informal advice of grandparents/experienced relatives/friends and of course mumnetters.

yeah give us a free book by all means, i'd read it, pick what i need out of it, then put it in to be recycled.

there are so many ways of parenting, none of them can say they are parenting 100% correctly.

Oh Carrie, when will the Govt realise it is so counterproductive fielding Ms Hodge to tell us about parenting issues when so many of us remember her good work in Islington's schools and CHILDREN'S HOMES? I just see red fur when I hear her name.
Not something you can blurt out tomorrow morning, of course.
I don't think free written advice on parenting is a bad idea at all. I've spent £££ on parenting and baby manuals be rather nice to have got something gratis!
In fact I'd like to see lots more money being poured into making the currently very pricey parenting courses and seminars readily accessible to people on lower incomes if they want to attend them. Problem is really that the people who need guidance wouldn't turn up. And won't read free leaflets either, because like that miserable family in Sheffield just this week, they tend to fall off the SS/HV/schools radar.
Good luck with your bit on Radio 5 tomorrow! Hope you get lots of input. The TV schedules this evening might help...

I think Margaret Hodge, who presided over a regime in Islington where vulnerable children in care were systematically sexually abused by social workers, who ignored it when she could have done something about it, and who then tried to portray one of the grown up victims as a nutter in order to undermine their campaign for justice, is the last person who is qualified to give anyone any parenting advice.

Go Sophable! Agree with every word. Was deeply depressed about fate of anti-smacking legislation.

And SNAP Caligula!

Sort of puts into question what is the role of government. Is it for elected officials to tell parents how to "parent" (they would have to define this term)or is it for them to create the society laws/structure in which it is possible to nuture a child? and for every child to attain its potential. Before you tell someone how to parent you really have to do the latter....

I think many women have babies with very little support and education. "Means testing" of parenting ability would be pretty hard to organise. If all parents had to attend for their first child, and good classes were available for all (big if I know) then those who are most alone and really need child benefit would be much more likely to attend.

Just MHO.

marina. agree about margaret hodge.

i'm with you janh. frankly, i had lots of support, but still could have done with more...!