@safety

[Etino]

I’ve just hesitated to tag a poster because I realised it’d send her an email. And I can imagine a situation where an abuser might well not know a user’s mn name but access emails. I know we have the option to switch notifications off, but circumstances change, is it really a good idea?

Hi there OP,

Thanks for getting in touch. We do understand where you're coming from but as it's quite a popular feature of Mumsnet, we don't have any plans to change it yet.

You can always change your preferences for email notifications here.

Just in case this helps, OP - if you NC, but then sign back in under your usual name, and type the NC in manually in the username field above your post, your posts will appear under the NC but tagged notifications come through in your email under whichever name you're currently signed in with, even if you are tagged under a different name. They will still link to the thread, of course, but it's slightly less obvious.

It doesn’t matter whether it’s easy or not to switch the facility off, I’m just pointing out it carries risk and in a support site I don’t think that’s wise.
(I love getting notifications to @etino btw, I just noticed when getting one my mn name is there writ large and thought of potential risks)

I understand where you're coming from @Etino, but the thing is, Mumsnet isn't solely a support site for cases such as the one mentioned in your original post. Besides, assuming an abuser has access to someone's email account and is aware of their presence on this site, all they have to do is perform a password reset and that'll be it.

It's a tricky situation, unfortunately. Though perhaps, it might help if notifications were turned off by default, with users being given the option to opt in should they wish for them?

Thanks @paisho!
Yes Mumsnet, can you make it opt in? With a little, ‘some people prefer not to receive emails for privacy reasons’ note.

Hi there Etino,

Thanks for getting back to us.

We do see where you're coming from but as other posters have said on the thread, Mumsnet isn't solely a support site for domestic abuse. Posters use Mumsnet for a range of reasons and as it's a popular feature we don't really think it'd be a good idea to make it opt in on the off chance that an abuser has access to a poster's Mumsnet linked email account.

We hope you understand.