Why has Mumsnet HQ retroactively edited four deleted messages?

[DaemonPantalaemon]

I do not want to start a thread about a thread. But I am in a Catch-22 logical bind here in that I cannot ask my question on the thread itself because the thread has been deleted.

So I am asking it here.

Why has Mumsnet edited its deletion messages on at least 4 threads? When the threads were initially deleted, they had deletion messages that said, among other things, our heart goes out to Poster X at this difficult time, and he assures us the support from Mumsunet has been helpful to him.

Another thread said it was important to give Poster X the benefit of the doubt.

Those deletion messages have now been edited with a generic "its time to stop talking about this".

So my question is, why is MNHQ so keen to gaslight the members of his forum by retroactively editing deletion messages?

Thank you.

MY WIFE HAS TERMINAL CANCER started by surreytimes
MY WIFE HAS TERMINAL CANCER (2) started by surreytimes
MY WIFE HAS TERMINAL CANCER (3) started by surreytimes
MY GORGEOUS WIFE AND MUMMY IS DEAD started by surreytimes
David and Caroline started by anahata
#becauseofcaroline started by frazzleds3 (the JG thread moved to charities board)

Those are the threads that I know of.

Is was a hq in a thread message.

The standard "we have no reason to believe that the poster is not genuine" was written on one of the deletion messages yesterday. I saw it.

If that's the case we will ask Tech to have a look as they'll have a record in some magic place of exactly what happened.

A magic place you say. I think you mean Tech will run a database query.

I can add here that I have no idea why surreytimes was not suspended or banned following the reports of inappropriate behaviour towards two other MNers.
I am, of course, assuming that these two MNers reported the incidents. If they didn't then no one can blame MNHQ.
If it was reported then I suspect that the sensitive nature of surreytimes' posted circumstances meant that MNHQ was more kid gloved than in other circumstances. Which would be strange as other forums do not allow anyone under any circumstances to engage in what was perceived as inappropriate behaviour.

I could still pm him at tea time. The pm went through and I didn't get an error message.

But why were posters giving a stranger on the internet, their phone numbers?. Mnhq can't be responsible for what grown ups get up to, off this site.

Id like to know exactly why I was suspended please? Was it for starting a TAAT? I did email MNHQ to query why I was unable to log on to my account last night and the majority of today. No response though.

I can also confirm that none of the original thread deletion messages that I saw said 'Its time to stop talking about this.'

Absolutely not if you. That's their responsibility.

But. He used this site to get them and it is alleged there were issues with what he did with them after that.

"he used this site to get them"

But if you asked me for my phone number MyChild, and I gave it to you, it's not then MNHQs responsibility, if one of us starts sending inappropriate messages.

There's a disconnect, though isn't there ifyougo, a contradiction between wailing in CAPS with lots of !!!!!!!, that you're BROKEN with grief and ON THE FLOOR and can't think straight to do a thread link and then (when people proffer contact details to offer support to your broken, grieving self) talking about being naked, and needing massages and missing intimacy and finding your interlocutor "very special"?

Mnhq can't be responsible for what grown ups get up to, off this site.

But they are responsible for adding validity to a poster's statements about their status and identity.

This may have given other MNers more confidence that a particular case is genuine and it is human nature to want to help someone who is posting about being distraught, falling apart and not knowing how to go on. The original MNHQ messages implied that they had checked and they had no reason to doubt the OP's veracity.

I could still pm him at tea time. The pm went through and I didn't get an error message.

I can still pm him now....🙄

But if you asked me for my phone number MyChild, and I gave it to you, it's not then MNHQs responsibility, if one of us starts sending inappropriate messages.

Arguable. But it's reasonable and community-spirited of you to then come back and highlight the gaping credibility chasm of the fundraiser to everyone here.

There's nearly a victim blaming element here.

Sorry yes, you are right that Hq should have highlighted what wa really going in, when they were warned about it. I'm tired, I'll shut up now!

Absolutely Serf.

None of the people targetted sexually have even suggested it's HQ's fault or asked for sympathy.

It's a shame that posters are determined to paint them as gullible fools rather than focus on a pervy fucker who took advantage.

Maybe some staffer has gone rogue?

Slightly apart from this thread, but I darent start a new one is how you (MNHQ) have seen my name dragged through the mud a bit here. There have been accusations of me 'being David' or 'in on the scam'. I understand why. But what I don't understand is that you must have looked in to my pms with David and my posting history and seen that I'm a genuine person. Gullible, but genuine. Yet you never one put people right about that? You never once corrected anyone. I know your busy, I know this is not about me, but it's still really shitty! Temporarily suspending me just adds to the suspicion.

Or simply a lack of communication and policy knowledge?

And people said I even had the same writing style as him. I BLOODY DONT!!!!!!!!!

Why am we still pm him.

Don't you believe us?

And even if you don't - why haven't you locked his ability to pm until you investigate since that's one of the ways he was sexually harassing posters and trying to garner personal details which he then used allegedly to sext and to leave sexually suggestive messages.