MNHQ .. Can we talk about disability bashing?

[Brownsugarshortbread]

Over the years i have posted on and enjoyed MN.
Sadly there seems to be a growing culture of it being okay to have a go at disabilities, those who claim DLA and those who's children have 'invisable' disabilities such as ADHD and ADD.
The terms 'freak' and 'scrounger' have been batted around and comments from some posters IMO certainly boarder on harrassment and discrimination.

When certain posts or posters have been reported, some have been removed, yet a lot haven't.

And while I agree with free speech, these types of comment or reaction to these comments, are not an education for those bigoted posters. Nor do those whose lives are touched by disability wish to be used to educate those posters.

Disability Harassment

is unwanted behaviour based on disability,
impairment or additional need. Such behaviour may include comments that are patronising or objectionable to the recipient or which creates an intimidating, hostile or offensive environment for people with disabilities. Disability harassment includes inappropriate reference to disability, unwelcome discussion of the impact of disability, refusal to work with and exclusion of people with disabilities from social events or meetings.

What about context? If someone is referring to something they have heard and it includes a word that someone finds offensive then that would be deleted and would stop the debate. Using the word as deliberate provocation or as an insult is easy to spot IMHO so could be easily deleted.

I think sadly what you see on here is just a reflection of a large proportion of our society. In rl we have encountered a lot of disablism and the most hurtful things said. There are people who turn their back on our family because of our son. These are adults, aparently intelligent ones at that. In rl I've come to the conclusion that there is little you can do with the attitude of adults. Its how they were raised and brought up. But you can change their kids. Their kids are now at school with disabled children (unlike their parents).

If society and things like MN can start to make the disabilist language unaccecptable then by the time our children are adults they will be living in a more accepting society, we would hope, not having to have the amazingly thick skin that us parents have had to grow.

Educating people works to an extent.

I can anme posters on here it has worked ofr. But there are plenty it hasn;t and who actively get a kick out of drawing us into conversations; that recent wanker who wanted anyone getting any benefits to lose thier vote and not be allowed a say, the one currently about who is anti benefits (it's always those isn;t it?), the idiot back along who argues for ages with me that tehre were tests for autism available pre birth even though i'd just done the aetiology MA ASD module and he was just dim.

The idiots don'; come with a flashing sign saying 'watch this one, it's a waste of effort and will make you tear your own eyes out'.

So yes to like (not hide poster; the twats will hide those of us who do try and argue- it can work against education) or even a versioon of the ebay feedback system: say if you have a certain amount of complaints against you for abuse reasons (as opposed to say being called a name that some people hate) you get a negative status or something. Ideally those posters should fly into moderation for a while but MN won't do that, at least a flag of some kind that applies to IP addy and not whatever troll name is used would be fab.

That initself should also involce a warning to the poster that theya re on probation; indeed a red username which if hovered over says 'poster under probation' would be fab.

But then have just bneen in teh school; ds1 (AS) told me that a particular child has been calling him a retard, or more specifically ' you're a spas oh no you're not, that's your nrotehr, you're in the brain so you're a retard'. Aparently he refers to ds3 as the spas brotehr (ds3 has ASD but does stim with his arms, guess that's what he means).
Chatting about this thread elicited the information. Sp a big positive. And whilst I could not see Head Ichatted to school sec and feel absolutely confident all hell will rian down on the kid. Sadly kid's Mum hhas told him it'sOk to use the terms as thy are medically correct (they are not even if that was ok). hopefully though kid will now be booted out of the time ot covered by ds1's statement and that of his girlfriend (PDD-NOS) as kid doesn;t have Sn, only crap parenting (have tried there- everything from offering emregency childcare, food parcels and far more).

If this thread had not been in prgress I might ahve left it; I was called similar as a child and worse by teachers (cretin was a fave IIRC) and tbh I didn't think anyone cared, but if I fight on here have to make a RL stand too no? Shame I was almost crying, never helps one look competent that.

Strabgely gratified to see a poster called somersetbelle on here as that's my hoe county and where eugenics-happy BIL lives. Gives me hope.

stewie I think you misread my post I was saying that too Not hard to tell which is a genuine post and which is a troll/insult/provocation

rebl agree absolutely about kids being at school with kids with SN.

I had a chidl with severe CP and a TA in my class, back in the seventies. My mate's brotehr was blind and I would argue had ASD. I am sure that sahped me with my opinions, and also helped enormously when the boys were dx'd- one adjustment I never had to make.

I think the education stance has to remain. I have learned a lot about SN on MN in fact I think it is the ONLY place I have ever seen this sort of information and experience on a human level and not in some leaflet in a public place that stays in its slot. We cannot ask MN to take a stand against bigotry and then not be prepared to do some of the educating.

stewie I do think we are all singing from the same hymn sheet here. In many ways I think the power in numbers to just completely ignore these sort of posts would say a lot more to the perpetrator than deletion. Can you imagine if every time someone posted in this way they got zero response?

Adults can change; Dh came from a racist homophobic household. he is powerfully anti discrimination of all types now. Challenging views, meeting people with different lives makes enormous differences.

It's not ahrd to worlk out what's ofesive; use the N word test. if you would delete with the N word then it's offensive. learning about disablism and what hurts is a process, one many of us older ones will have observed throughout the eighties and seventies, but we should be willing to make the effort for that.

As for SN Mafia / professionally offended / word police- what eva. I mean, seriously are we supposed to care about such disingenuous claptrap?

NH I am prepeared to kepp up the educating if I have a strong and intolerant of abuse MNHQ standing firm behind me.

It ahs to be a double act where I feel safe and not thrown to the mercy of the dogs with no safeguards.

I really hope this is resolved soon!

we are not singing from the same hymn sheet. afaia the majority of posters on this thread just want the words zapped, context or no. i think that is tricky (and have wittered endlessly about it...) but can really see their point as well.

btw i was thinking this morning that i should start a thread encouraging lurkers to vote on this issue as i imagine this particular thread is rather long to start reading.

however, best way to get them to pay attention would be to use words like mong, retard, spaz etc and ask them to agree or disagree that they are hate words and should be treated like nigger, paki etc. because that's tabloid MN, that's how we roll these days. if you want to make a splash with a thread it has to have an eye-catching headline.

i won't, obv. but the irony did strike me that the best way for aims to be achieved is to roll them out.

I don't think MN have a precedent for a blanket ban. Context is acceptable I think.

I'll do soemthing like it NH, given what happened with ds1 it's appropriate. In AIBU I think.

Context is aceptable but MNHQ should be able to reword posts where the word could be rude or not.

Is it really true that MNHQ don't already treat those three hate words aitch mentioned as being exactly as unacceptable as race-hate words? I'd be shocked if that was the case.

apparently not, threadie. i said almost exactly the same thing further down, and justa said she was shouted down for querying 'monging out'. (i think it was that).

I am fed up with being told we have to educate. as I have said it is then us who has to take the abuse.
perhaps the people who are so keen to spend their mn time educating people who think words like spas and mong for instant are just words can do it for us and take the flack.
I joined mn 5 years ago to get support, back then the sn topic was a safe nice place and I needed =, I didn't join to educate people who think I chose to have a disabled child, or that she shouldn't be here(yep been told that) or that I am selfish cos I accept her sn.
I glad people have learnt stuff, but you can do that by going into the sn topic, you can ask, no one minds a proper question, but expecting tired, tressed out people to keep fighting is wrong.

although right enough she said she can't recall if she reported to MN. but i do think that if people are defending monging out (ffs) that is a sea change and maybe our 'oh we self-moderate' line isn't sufficient.

I think you have to keep educating no matter how sick of it you get! It is a joint effort and these things do take time. Obviously if you come here are repeatedly 'targeted' that is not on but otherwise it is vital.

(btw how are you keeping, nodders?)

(aitch will know friday! all results in so fingers crossed thanks for asking!)

ok, aitch, fair enough. That is horribly depressing. I really didn't know that.