MNHQ .. Can we talk about disability bashing?

[Brownsugarshortbread]

Over the years i have posted on and enjoyed MN.
Sadly there seems to be a growing culture of it being okay to have a go at disabilities, those who claim DLA and those who's children have 'invisable' disabilities such as ADHD and ADD.
The terms 'freak' and 'scrounger' have been batted around and comments from some posters IMO certainly boarder on harrassment and discrimination.

When certain posts or posters have been reported, some have been removed, yet a lot haven't.

And while I agree with free speech, these types of comment or reaction to these comments, are not an education for those bigoted posters. Nor do those whose lives are touched by disability wish to be used to educate those posters.

Disability Harassment

is unwanted behaviour based on disability,
impairment or additional need. Such behaviour may include comments that are patronising or objectionable to the recipient or which creates an intimidating, hostile or offensive environment for people with disabilities. Disability harassment includes inappropriate reference to disability, unwelcome discussion of the impact of disability, refusal to work with and exclusion of people with disabilities from social events or meetings.

Nicely twisted (waaay back)

FWIW my belief is that campaigns, whilst great, mean very little when such disgusting terminology is allowed and not dealt with on here. Kind of smoothing the icing over a maggot infested cake.

I actually originally came here for help and support with parenthood, an experience which is being severely tarnished by the inability of the owners of this board to take a strong line with quite clearly unacceptable posts and harrassment of members who have as much right to be here as anyone else.

The Hitler analogy was a caricature. An overblown example. Eg complete and utter monster responsible for the deaths of millions, but he did love his fwuffy wuffy bunny wabbits.

MN - on the surface doing campaigns that help those with disabilities, but actually under all that putting their fingers in their ears and going 'lalalala' towards an issue that is really very important to a portion of their membership.

Like I said, an extreme analogy but hey ho.

I have reported as they are a prime example of the bigotry we face daily.

my point is that to you it is offensive, to me it is not. It can be offensive in some instances, but this depends on the sentiment behind the word. If a friend called me a retard for forgetting my purse I would not be offended. If someone shouted the word at someone with disabilities on a bus, it would be.

For me, it is about intent. The word is simply a word - it has no innate offence

We all have our own boundaries, but you are trying to make yours universal

The old 'intent' chesnut.

Yeah I can call my OH a N**r as long as I dont mean in a horrible way

TheFlyingOnion - the whole entire point is that the LAW has made boundaries. All we are asking, is that a site like MNHQ adheres to those boundaries.

its not against the law to call someone a retard, Lougle

Retard is a vile wordto use. I hope i nevermeet someone who uses it in real life

here

You are wrong, Onion. I think it was Humpty Dumpty who said that he used words to mean 'just what he wanted them to mean' and he was wrong too. Just as (imo -- I appreciate that others hear it differently) Lougle was wrong to bring to bear a superceded meaning of "moron", you too are wrong to insist on your private, non-offensive, meaing of 'retard' or 'spastic'. We talk within a linguistic community. Words have no private meaning and no timeless meaning and we need to defer to how they are, in fact, used by a current community of speakers..

I see Threadworm, so I was wrong and so was Lougle.

Are you the only one who is right, then?

Many words are wrong, they just are deemede unacceptable and that is becuase peoplemwere informed and developed understanding. I am old enough to remember use of the N word, the P word, random assorted names and standard insults for gay people.

Those words and phrases stopped being generally used becuase people decided that they were unacceptable, they made it wrong to use them.

Retard, spaz, mong etc HAVE to go the same way. But only will do so if people decide to deminise them- theya re as bad as the first set and IMO a decent human being will use none of them out of relevant context (after all much as retard has medical usage, I used the N word a lot in my dissertaion on the transatlantic slave trade, esp. in quotes etc. becuase it was relevant. I;d cut out my own tongue before I used it in rl though).

A few eyars ago we were part of a group of Sn famillies invited to accompany a rugby tour for the first time, our eldest plays for the Sn side. It was great, met lovely people (one on ehre actually, sixtyfootdoll) and enjoyed the whole acceptance etc.

Except for the coach who turned up wearing a T-Shirt saying 'MONG'.

Was it meant to be offensive? Did he even realise the meaning? Who knows, he ahs never been anything other than lovely to the boys.

Did I feel uncomfortable? hell yes. Did I quietly ce;ebrate the compere at teh entertainment who took the mike and told him it was damned rude? absolutely.

Is it ok to punch someone who uses the word retard as long as you do it in a joking way?

TFO although admittedly deleted CK was famouss for ehr posts about how disabled children should be killed.

Is that not disablist? the threads about not wanting Sn kids in their child's classes? Equating Sn with bad behaviour?

All disablist.

are you being serious Peachy?

Have I said at any point disabled children should be killed? Have I denied that "disablism" exists?

Would you like to go and have another read of my posts?

No TFO you said you have not seen any disablist posts on here

I said in fact here are some examples

'TheFlyingOnion Tue 07-Jun-11 18:39:36
wow I don't think I've ever seen anything "disabilist" on MN.

'

See.

Lougle, please explain to me HOW my thread www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/1231140-JUST-STOP-IT-YOU-MORONS-OR-I-FLOUNCE is disabled- bashing?

Educate me please.

I like to think that I am sensitive to such issues, as my sister in law is severely physically and mentally disabled, my father is paralyzed in a wheelchair, and although it is not regarded a disability as such, my mum has alzheimer dementia and is at the moment showing some extremely challenging behaviour.

Just how you can turn a thread about people mocking hunz by making numerous "hun like" threads into disabled bashing, I honestly do not understand....

Threadworm, that isn't entirely true, is it?

Words are used by different communities differently. For example, the Black community have in part, reclaimed the word 'nigger'. One Black person may call another a 'nigger', but you can bet your bottom dollar that a White person, no matter how friendly or close to a Black person, could call them a 'nigger' without offence taken.

I do feel strongly. What happens today, this week, this month, this year, is going to have a life-long impact on how my daughter, currently a 5 year old, will be treated in the future.

Will she have to endure people calling each other 'spaz' or 'moron' or 'retard', or worse, when they see her attempts at running, calling her a 'spaz' or a 'retard'?

My DH was at a park with her last month. A girl fell over, and DD1, in her way, showed concern. She approached the girl, and said 'are yew otayyy???' She has S&L delays and very unclear speech. The girl, around 13 years old, then proceeded to mimic my daughter for several minutes with her friends.

Should my DH put up with that? Should my 5 year old, who currently has no perception that she is 'different' or 'retarded', be made aware that she is being mocked?

NO. He approached the girl and said 'Do you mind, poking fun at my daughter?'. The girls left shortly after.

"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never harm me".

One of the biggest lies of our society, IMO.

right well as this ck was deleted, is it a surprise I've never seen her posts?

I haven't seen any. I'm not saying there have never been any. Entirely different point.

you were welcome to give examples; had I seen anything shocking I would have jumped right on the bandwagon.

I'm not for disablism ffs

If I remember rightly though you ARE for criticising the lives of parent carers though aren't you?