My name is Huw, I am not an alcoholic, I don't do drugs and you can stick bum sex up your jacksy, my question is far more embarassing...

[HuwEdwards]

It's DP.

He has insisted on this since I've known him - over 20 years.

He has to have tea made in a teapot, and the teapot has to have a tea cosy so he can go back time after time.

An addict, I know, but I still love him

WTF can I do? Tea cosies are vile. We currently have a very faded cack one that desparately needs replacing.

I want a plain lipstick red one but all I can find are hideous things that look like badly knitted woolly hats.

If anyone anyone sends me a link to a knitting pattern, I will kill them.

Alternatively, there's this gormless looking sheep one that I got for my father. Plus it's fairtrade and ethical, and every one comes with a tag telling you which Kenyan lady knitted it.

Get an Aga with a warming plate. Perfect for the naked teapot.

Hey, Huw - have you seen the shopping trolley thread? Might do a knitted one with a bobble/pompom...

Embrace it. I'll just look for a site with hair curlers, so you can put three under your headscarf whilst you're pouring.

rofl

Why the dig at bumsex?

Cuz bumsex is minging.

When you've got a perfectly good fanny, that is

Wikipedia is the font of all wisdom:

'An "anal orgasm" is an orgasm brought on by anal stimulation, such as from anal sex, an inserted finger, or a sex toy. Anecdotal evidence suggests that some women experience anal orgasm as qualitatively different from clitoral or vaginal orgasm, though for many others the distinction is less clear.'

i love this one

loads to choose from on notonthehighstreet

Please don't talk about bumsex and tea in teh same thread its not right.