Tag-along bike, trail-gaitor or follow-me tandem

[Havannah]

I am new to Mumsnet, so I apologise if I've posted this in the wrong place.
I am 5'3" and not the fittest or strongest Mum out there. I am not a keen cyclist but can see that it would be beneficial to me, and my 4 year old son to get out and active. My son - I am a single parent by the way - is very active and strong, and looks v slim but actually weighs heavy because he is quite muscular. He cannot be relied upon to cycle on his own sensibly, so I want a way to give him the fun he wants, without compromising his safety. I have seen adverts for various tag-along type bikes but frankly I don't know what to go for - I'm guessing the lighter ones would be better for me to handle, but as I'm no expert cyclist myself, stability will also be an issue. Has anyone out there got any helpful opinions or suggestions?

Have you ever cycled with him even in a baby seat? Actually, he's not necessarily too big for one still (they go up to 22 kg).

tbh, in Britain, if you're not a keen cyclist, I'm not sure you can make a good experience out of cycling together. Walks in the country park might be better.

Childback tandem costs a fortune, btw.

I did a lot if research on this, and the bike geek websites all said that the Follow Me Tandem was by far the most stable, sturdy, safest etc. I waited for one to come up locally on eBay (which took a while) and got it.

They are not cheap, even secondhand, and was a complete pain to fit.

However, now it's in place it's absolutely great. I can happily have dd (3) attached on quiet roads and then just undo her when we get to the park, so she can have an independent ride around.

I do want to get hold of a flag for her bike though, as I worry she's not very visible low down behind me.

I'd get a trailgator as then when you are somewhere he can cycle safely you can let him off, then reattach.

I'd disagree about Britain not being somewhere to have a good experience cycling. There are loads of places you can go to cycle really off road, and then work up from there in terms of cycle paths then roads.

My ex used a trail gator with DD, it was great for them, he is quite a strong bloke but I think you'd be ok. Nice thing is that you can let him cycle when it's safe rather than having to always be on the back of yours.

Thanks for all this. I do take my son for walks, but he is a bit of a speed freak, so he either gets a bit bored (and has a tantrum - I know he's a bit old to be behaving like that but he does have some behavioural problems which are work in progress), or I get stitch and exertion all asthma! I think I could satisfy his desire for a bit of speed on a tag along type thing, and where I live there are some safe bridle ways and the roads to them are fairly quiet roads.
I too have been looking at various sites, but whilst I've seen that the Follow-me has generally great reviews, especially as regards build quality, safety and stability, I've also seen it said that they are quite heavy, especially if the child's bike being attached is not aluminium (and most are not). I've also seen some grumbles about rust, which is a bit of a concern for such an expensive item.
Is there anyone who has tried both sorts of system - one attaching to the seat post and one attaching to the rear wheel frame - is it really that much more stable?

Have you looked or asked on bike radar? There is a relevant thread on there at the moment.