Mans Perspective... Ejaculation

[ActsOfPureJoy]

OH and I had sex this morning. He came pretty quickly. I could tell this was going to happen because he was restricting movement to hold off. Anyway, he said something refering to the bed being wet on his side. He had to get up for work so he kindly got me some wipes. I went to the bathroom when he'd gone to clean up, but I didn't need to because there was nothing to clean up. I went back to the bed to wake up a bit before the morning rush. I looked to see where the wet patch was. I don't know why I looked, it was just in my mind that he'd said about it, and I wasn't messy down there (I would apologise for tmi but it's a sex forum) 😅 There was no wet patch. Not in bed, or the floor.

Why could this be? We've been working through some life issues and sex has taken a hit. We've barely done it in the last 6 months, but things have improved and I wanted to get back some intimacy. Does the lack of sperm mean he's been masterbating a lot, or very recently? In which case I would have expected him to last longer... Obviously I have no problem with self relief. I just don't understand why he said about the wet patch but there was no mess - anywhere.

Any thoughts? 🤔

Ample of thoughts 😅.
Lack of sperm if he usually cum a lot, means he either masturbated not long ago, if he doesn't have any health conditions that impacts it or he is masturbating all the time. He could of faked cuming 🤔. The mention of the wet patch is a text book deflection as he knew there wasn't a lot of cum and maybe you will feel it or notice it.
That's my personal opinion.

Thank you for responding.

There isn't any health issues as far as I'm aware. There's normally an abundance, even if we gone two rounds.

The thing is, I don't know when he'd get time to be wanking so much that he would be empty! He goes to sleep before me, he gets up earlier than me, but I'm awake to hear him getting ready for work. He showers fast - never spends hours in the bathroom. He's rarely alone in the house, and apart from work, he's at home with us.

This might be a non-thing, but I have noticed he's been adjusting himself a lot lately. Like hand down his trousers. 😅 Not playing with himself! Just what appears to be making himself more comfortable. I've noticed because he's never been one of those men to be constantly having his hands down his boxers. (Ex was forever making sure it was still there!) 😆 Maybe my imagination is running wild!

Something just feels off - hence me looking for the wet patch. A woman's intuition, if you like.

A couple of things affect volume of ejaculation. One of them is how many times you might have already ejaculated in the previous 48 hours (doesn’t make much difference beyond that), and the other is how turned on you are in the run up to sex and ejaculation.

if you’ve been horny all day, or wake up really turned on and you’re either already hard or take very little touch to get erect, then the volume tends to be significantly greater, especially if the orgasm isn’t rushed. If it’s a case where you’ve had to be a bit more rough in getting your erection then you could end up with little more than a dribble.

I’ve not noticed that it has any effect on orgasm strength though and it still feels great however much effort it took to get things going 😊

Thanks for the response.

I've never experienced this with him before. We've been together well over a decade.

All I did was cuddle his back. He was facing away from me but after a few minutes he turned over and put my hand on his erection.

Maybe I'm over thinking it. I just got vibes. Especially as he (so say) came very quickly.

Seems like he didn't cum at all and for whatever reason didn't want to tell you. When ex and I were in a rough spot sexually, I was masturbating a lot - as was she with her toy. Once or twice she initiate sex after i had already cum. I still got hard and made her orgasm (our sex was good when it happened) but it wasn't going to happen for me so I faked going through the motions or cumming. As she was quite wet down there it was't too obvious. I would not do this now and would rather say that foreplay and sex was enough with no need to cum.
Not sure if this is of help to you?

As to fiddling with his penis - not sure why if he's not normally done this. Most men cant keep hands of it but not usually in such an obvious manner. Def no health issues you know or maybe don't know of yet?

Could it be that he’s fiddling with his penis because it’s sore or itchy? Any other things going on? Discharge, redness, spots… (for him and you)

I'm good down there.

We haven't been that intimate so I have no clue if he's having any off symptoms. I haven't asked him either.

I might have to ask if he's got something going on down there he needs to share... Not literally, I hope!! But I'm conscious of seeming paranoid and mistrustful.

I think I need to initiate a gentle, non-confrontational conversation.

Maybe he's somehow found alone time to relieve himself (a lot). Just doesn't seem possible in our lives. That said, I solo while he's sleeping next to me so there no reason why he's not doing the same I guess.

I'd be sad if he felt he had to lie about something so irrelevant. I wasn't trying to initiate sex, I just wanted to bring back some closeness. He is very tactile and I know he misses touch. He's been trying hard to work on the things we've been struggling with. I wanted to reciprocate the effort by showing him affection.

Maybe he faked an orgasm?

I'm not sure on some of the issues raised and maybe some elements are a bit of overthinking. Related to men ejaculating I can just give you some information from our situation (me and hubby); my husband does masturbate and has found if he wanks a couple of times in a short time period then he can get to a point where he has an orgasm but no cum is actually released, like he's used it all up. I hate the wet patch so this is great when it happens!

I think I need to initiate a gentle, non-confrontational conversation.

You really don't, just forget about it. If it starts to happen a lot ask then.

My bet? Quicky before work maybe he didn't think he was going to get over the line so pretended he'd cum as a quick way out. Or maybe he just didn't cum much that time - it happens.

Whatever, don't make an issue of it. Just let it slide.

It sounds as though he might have suffered Retrograde Ejaculation. It feels like an orgasm but most of the semen passes into the bladder. You said he stopped and he might have been holding back after the point of no return, if you do this to excess then it can cause this to happen (some men actually get off on it!) . Ask him if his pee was very cloudy that morning.

As we get older we produce less.
Could he have been referring to how wet you was?
Maybe he's missed the intimacy and now it's starting to come back into your lives that got him hard when you stroked his back... doesn't take much for us men to rise to the occasion 😁

Please don’t bring this up, he may have faked his orgasm to end sex or he may have just not ejaculated much or any other reason

just continue with the touch and affection

I'd have to have ejaculated twice, maybe even three times on the same day before basically hardly any semen comes out from an orgasm. Can't speak for other men, but if it was my first/second ejaculation of the day there would definitely be a wet patch afterwards.

This is a good point too, agree this is a possibility.

I think it maybe retrograde ejaculation. As you haven’t been intimate for a while and seem to be trying to rebuild your relationship I wouldn’t have a conversation with him just yet as it may hamper your progress in reconciling properly. The fact is that you strolling his back made him hard and he initiated sex - that shows there is attraction and desire to restart sexually. I am a female btw and it could be caused by nerves, rushing ect. It has happened once with my partner … and I was questioning things like you are. I didn’t ask him in the end.