Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Sex

You need to have been registered for 7 days to post in the Sex forum. Please don’t send unwanted PMs to other users.

Never orgasmed from sex

5 replies

VVM · 01/11/2025 01:47

Sorry this is rather long I just wanted other’s experiences/ inputs. Just as the title says but I wanna go a bit deeper. Ok, so I have never once had an orgasm from penetration. I have squirted many times but it was just an involuntary reaction to the stimulation and nothing more, it didn’t feel “good” and I didn’t orgasm. My now ex of very recent seems to be under the impression or delusion that every woman cums from sex. We were having a general conversation about this and I told him that they actually don’t and that sex for a lot of women starts in the mind and remains there, sometimes it’s the thoughts that get you going or it can be the emotional side if you’re in love. I don’t know how to explain that well but for me it was… the actual act of sex was neither here nor there but I loved it because of who I was doing it with, in the case with him because I was madly in love. I’ve also had encounters where there were absolutely no feelings at all and tbh more of a hook up situations but again it was the thought of “this man wanting my body” that I enjoyed and got turned on by rather than the actual sex itself. I can make myself orgasm in minutes, sometimes seconds with no problem but that is clitoral stimulation. I rarely insert toys during masturbation because it simply just doesn’t do anything for me. Anyway going back to my ex and our chat he was adamant that every woman he’s been with including me has cum from sex. I told him that many women cannot and need clitoral play to achieve an orgasm but he kept telling me I was wrong. Onto the next subject…. Again my ex in my opinion is so naive he’s one of them guys who thinks everything he sees in porn is how it should be done and that the women are most definitely cumming again and again. I told him a lot of it is fake and for the cameras and referred to a well known OF model who in an interview was honest and said she has never cum in any of her videos despite obviously portraying that she does, it’s all acting. She was very open and said that whilst filming anal scenes there would be film cuts and breaks and even whilst the filming was in action she would be sniffing poppers under the pillow. I have never really been able to reach orgasm through oral sex either and again it has everything to do with men doing what they see in porn, 1 being the sucking the clit trick that is in almost every porn scene but in my case I can feel teeth too and honestly all this does is make my legs twitch like crazy but it feels awful and actually takes the sensation away of building up to an orgasm. Number 2 is when they again suck onto the clit and then do that head shaking thing, it just feels so unbelievably shit. It’s as if guys don’t know the basics that (for me anyway) making sure their tongue is wet enough with saliva at all times is important. I’ve also had the same problem again and again where I will start of wet and then guys will rub my clit so hard that it goes completely dry and it doesn’t even feel good but it just hurts and feels awful but they seem to think that the excessive rubbing is what will get me off. I’ve had fingers being literally shoved in and again excessive in and out that it makes me go from being wet to completely dry and yet they still don’t stop and switch it up yet they rather just carry on and all it does is feel dry like the Sahara and then feels sore. Now I’ve had a few sexual partners so I’m not even referring to one or 2 guys here, it is quite literally the same story again and again with every guy. I guess to round it up it’s the excessive hard rubbing of my clit and fingering and then the sucking with teeth on my clit which makes me so sore that is just really annoying for me. I honestly have reached the point where I can eye roll at the thought of sex because I know how it’ll end and I’m bored of faking orgasms. Just for your information I have absolutely no problems with vaginal dryness and I infact do start of very wet during sex but then here comes the hard rubbing and teeth sucking on my clit and it just dries me up and feels shit as anything. I have said to guys please forget all this extra stuff and quite simply just make sure your tongue is wet and just lick and I’ll orgasm in minutes, no sucking and biting but they still will do it because it’s programmed into them from
what they’ve seen in porn. I do appreciate that some women may enjoy the sucking thing (if you even understand what I’m talking about). I’ve also told guys every woman is different and needs different motions and speeds to achieve orgasm but it goes nowhere and we end up back with me feeling like I’m in a porno.

OP posts:
VoodooQualities · 01/11/2025 06:54

Forget your stupid ex, he's a dickhead.

I'm sorry but I couldn't get all the way through your post, it's written like a stream of consciousness!

mnmnddddd · 01/11/2025 07:33

I think you've summed up the problem really well in the last two sentences - everyone is different and the men you've been with just haven't been listening.
There absolutely are men out there who are good in bed - those that will listen to you and observe and care how your body reacts.
For all of us, finding a partner who is kind, attractive, emotionally availavble, rich, attentive, single AND sexually compatible, is statistically harder than we're told it should be, and you don't need to put up with those who aren't able to tick all the boxes in your venn diagram. You just need to be selective and patient when looking for the right man.

You haven't said how old the men you're dating are and I wonder if that's significant. Whilst I wouldn't advocate dating older men for the sake of it, I do think having had years to learn what to do (sexually AND just how to be a good at relationships - pretty sure Wonen's Hour discussed this a while back) puts them at an advantage over 20somethings who haven't had much opportunity to learn from experience.

I hope you heal quickly from your recent ex and can find the right person for you in the future. ❤️

AlexaAdventuress · 01/11/2025 15:51

I think you've just got a rather opinionated, inconsiderate and set in his ways ex partner. Whilst some women come from intercourse alone, many don't. Maybe his former partners were just pretending so he'd get off them and they could go to sleep.

I'm very similar in that I'm too tender in that area to enjoy vigorous stimulation or direct suction. Gentle licking with the flat of the tongue is more my style. The thought of those clit sucker toys that seem to be advertised everywhere these days just makes me want to cross my legs very tightly! People vary enormously in terms of what they like, and this too may differ according to the mood, life stage, time of the month and much else besides. Fortunately I've been lucky with partners, by and large. They are out there!

Mcc8700 · 03/11/2025 13:36

I would say slow and steady wins the race! My wife has said the same on the occasion I’ve rubbed slightly harder and stopped and then more gentle she will normally orgasm when playing with her before PIV. A bloke is going to hate it if you’re aggressively giving him a handjob and it’ll be the same for a woman. I can imagine the biting won’t be that pleasurable either.

bosqueverde · 04/11/2025 19:48

Man here...
Sorry I read and doing a double back... your ex is trying to tell you how you feel about sex with and what you enjoyed? I would say tell him f* off but thankfully he already has.

Some practical things... you're tired of faking? Simples. Don't. Tell your partners you won't any more and stick to it. In a bad relationship they don't deserve your moans; in a good one they deserve your real self.

Tell them what you like, and demand they learn to do it.

Finally, tell them to listen to Alexey Welsh online. That'll teach them.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page

This topic prevents users from posting on it until they have been members for at least 7 days.