Just wanted to share something I wrote after a recent experience on here. A man PM’d me and we built what felt like a genuine connection, similar interests, thoughtful conversations and he asked all the right things. But when I didn’t follow the route he was clearly hoping for he vanished. It left me with a mix of feelings.
I processed it the best way I know how, with words.
This is for anyone who’s dealt with digital charm that turned out to be performance. I hope it resonates.
I just lost a lie.
It wore kind words like armor and charm like a tie
He gave me his time with a gentle disguise
And whispered connection through well polished lines
He PM’d me on Mumsnet, polite and well spoken
A message so warm it felt like a token
We formed a connection thinking it was real
Bonded by same values, by thoughts, by feel
He asked about my life, all the right cues
Made it seem like he cared like he’d walked in my shoes
We had similar interests, a natural flow
He played the part well like a seasoned pro
I never knew what he looked like, not a face not a clue
Just a faceless man spinning threads that felt true
He mirrored my thoughts, my values, my tone
But always behind a keyboard, always alone
And just when I spoke from a place that was true
The mask slipped and he vanished from view
No warning, no drama, no chance to ask why
Just silence and shadows, a digital goodbye
Turns out my “friend” was just playing a role
With patience and flattery as tools of control
Waiting to see if I’d play the same game
And when I declined he vanished in shame
But let’s be clear, I didn’t lose gold
Not love, not kindness, not a hand to hold
I lost a fiction with practiced replies
A man shaped echo wrapped in lies
So this is for every woman online
Who spots the signs, the subtle decline
If he’s too smooth and never gets real
You might be the next name on his meal
Trust your gut, stay sharp don’t cry
Because you didn’t lose love
You just lost a lie.