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Bi-curious with another woman first time in 40s - any advice?

3 replies

YourCosyLilacWasp · 12/07/2025 01:46

Been on the one long term relationship every since I was 17 with ex-boyfriend with no kids. I am in early 40s now.

About 4 years ago, we broke up and ever since, I have been single.
Sex with my ex-boyfriend was mostly good but, not proactive (1 per month) and no sex for more than a year before break up. Feeling bit depressing, tired and want to start having a sex tbh.

Initially chemistry was good with him but, became tired and not enjoying.
I have not had any sex since break up and no longer interest in looking for boyfriend or fwb men (at least for now)..
Also, lost interest in masturbating, I don't have any sex toys as well.
I think my sex drive will pick up if it starts but, not at the moment..

I have a straight childhood female friend and she recently broke up with her bf..
When we recently had a dinner together over the weekend.. she expressed her interest in exploring sex with another woman - which was bit of surprise at the time..

since then, last few days, I became quite curious to have a kiss and sex with another women as well for the first time..

Is it common for women in the age of 40s to start exploring sexuality?

And for me to have the sex, I need to have with someone I am comfortable with which makes me wondering if I should ask friends about exploring sex together or will I risk too much friendships and end up being bad?

Also, lesbian sex, as I am virgin with woman.. is there anything I should be aware of compare to having sex with man? I don't see any pregnancy risks etc.. what would be the good to be aware of, any tips on leading and enjoy sex together if neither of us are experienced?

If you are experienced with both men and women, what were the main difference during relationships and sex? Was having a first time sex with woman enjoyable experience worth exploring?

OP posts:
SecretFerret · 12/07/2025 09:52

I just cannot imagine why flocks of posters haven't descended ready to share all the deets with you here...

Floradear · 12/07/2025 10:38

Are you prepared to take the lead? Is she?
It was probably the man who tried to get his hands in your pants first. You could both be waiting for the other to start. At least you know how to unclip her bra😀.
As long as you both want to explore, first fumbles can be fun.
Take it easy on the alcohol though. Enjoy!

noego · 12/07/2025 12:52

I suggest that you go dating rather than risk a friendship. See how it goes. You can relate your adventures with your friend and see how she responds.

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