Partner has premature ejaculation

[SexConcerns]

I'm in the early stages of a sexual relationship with a man. He is having difficulties with ejaculating too soon during sex. I don't exactly have a stopwatch next to the bed, but he usually orgasms within 2 minutes of his penis being inside my vagina. At times, it can barely be a minute. He has said that he feels so aroused by me that he feels like he is on the precipice of having an orgasm by the time he takes his underwear off. I have noticed he gets fully erect just from kissing and foreplay, and he also starts to produce a lot of pre-cum just from doing that.

I feel very attracted to this man and I must say he is enthusiastic about pleasuring me in other ways, particularly with his tongue and fingers. I would like intercourse to last for longer than 1-2 minutes though. Does anyone have any suggestions? I've heard of pills that men can be prescribed to delay ejaculation, but I don't know if the NHS would prescribe them.

I have noticed he gets fully erect just from kissing and foreplay, and he also starts to produce a lot of pre-cum just from doing that.

This is entirely normal and my husband is like this even after 19 years together, sometimes even before we’re even anywhere near each other. Just the thought of sex alone is enough to trigger an erection.

In your case, could you try going a second round? Have you tried this? He’s likely to last longer a second time around. I guess it depends on how quickly he can get hard again. It’s a common solution to this issue, especially when it’s caused simply by being so aroused/excited.

Hey @SexConcerns incan totally relate to this , having had sever PE in the past.

The most important thing you can do, is not make a big deal out of it. 90% of the time PE is psychological, so the best thing you can do is make him feel relaxed and comfortable.

As @AlexandrinaH said, the fact that he gets easily aroused is not a bad thing at all, now you both need to learn how to control that primal urge. And it really is a primal instinct, men were designed to orgasm quickly, so they could reproduce 1000’s of years ago before they were attacked by rival tribes or wild animals.

subtly introducing toys into the bedroom is a good idea, for him, a cock ring is a great option. This will trap the blood in the corpus cavernosa so even after he finishes he will still stay hard. Make sure it only stays on for 30 minutes though.

going for two round ls is another option, after he has finished round round, the next 15 minutes are all about you. Once he has finished with you he should be ready to go again.

There are things he can do and you can do together to prolong round one. For him, Kegals are excellent for strengthening the pelvic muscles and thus has shown to delay ejaculation. For exercises you can both do, edging is fun and works for a lot of men. He need to learn how to breathe properly so when he is on the edge, he can draw back and continue going.

There’s desensitising spray you can get, gel and condoms. All work, but I found they took the fun out of sex for me and they were a short term fix and not a long term solution.

PDE5’s such as Viagra and cialis are worth trying, especially when combined with a cock ring. They won’t make a man last longer, but generally the refractory period is far shorter. When I used them alongside a cock ring, I didn’t actually go soft and could just continue as if it was round one.

Alcohol is a known substance that will delay ejaculation but he needs to find the right balance. Tipsy but not drunk is the ideal.

Music- a little bit like men are told to think of something horrible when they are close, nice background music will often help with PE.

PE is very rarely physical and nearly always psychological; the more he worries about it the harder it will be for him to beat it.

Google "squeeze technique" - I've used it in the past & it's worked.

I was like this when I was first with a partner, the excitement and newness of everything would make me very aroused before we got to the actual act. I suspect if you just make little of it, maybe try the round 2 technique (definitely worked for me, and round 3 was even better:) ) then i think in time it may become less of an issue. I suspect in most cases it is physiological. If after a few months things aren't improving maybe look at talking to a doc.

I posted this in response to another thread on the same issue, so I'll post it again here...

I'm a man with the same issue. Try working with it rather than against it. My ex was brilliant at this...

Basically she'd get me off orally first, then we'd move onto foreplay and build-up to getting her off. By the time she'd finished I'd be really excited again and we could move onto penetration at which point I'd last much longer as I'd already finished once. It was great!

I don't think there's anything wrong with me. I just love sex so much, am so easily aroused and was so attracted to her physically, that I couldn't contain myself at the beginning of each physical encounter. Treating my first orgasm as a tactical move and then settling in for the long haul once it was out of the way made for some gloriously involved and satisfying sessions.

This approach also meant I could relax and really enjoy that first orgasm instead of having to think about something unpleasant to try to slow myself down.

Talk to him firstly and tell him it's not a big deal, this will hopefully relax him. Myself and my wife have been through it, she was great about it.
Try getting him a cock ring, it will keep him hard for longer. Also their are relaxing self help techniques on line that have helped myself.