I lost my virginity this year, later than normal (I’m in my thirties). He didn’t know I was a virgin, it was a tinder date that went from speaking to sex very quickly (ie we started talking on the Saturday, by Tuesday I was in his bed). His personality was a bit crap but he was very, very good...
I have had bad (non consensual) experiences before so admittedly setting the bar low but there were multiple orgasms on both parts - he was v v me focused. He played my favourite album (Pink Floyd) and deliberately timed it so when song climaxed so did I.
Although that means I can’t listen to that album anymore without remembering.
Cuddled me afterwards for the rest of the night - fell asleep cuddled up etc (and then did it all over again at 5am).
He wasn’t in it for a relationship and neither was I but I’m a bit stuck on him, if that makes sense. Not so much his personality but how he made me feel. I’ve never felt that way in my life. Never felt safe or attractive or desired.
How do I move on? We aren’t in touch as it was just a one night stand, I’ve since moved away anyway, but I think of it/him quite often… is that normal?