Feeling unwanted

[Iom92]

Throughout our entire relationship (30+) years, there have been so many times (too many to count) where I have initiated (or tried to initiate) sex with my partner. Often they have a headache, or they’re soft, or I’m being too much (too rough - by giving them a hand job, or too full on). They have a kink that I’m not overly on board with but I’ve gone along with over the years for the sake of maintaining a sex life. Tonight I’ve demeaned (imo) myself by going along with this kink, only for them to say it’s too much. What is the point. I feel rejected and unwanted, which is how I’ve felt pretty much from the very early days of our relationship. I’m left questioning what is the point.

This is so sad. No one should be in an unfulfilling and selfish sexual relationship and that too for so many years. Have you had a honest discussion about your feelings, outside the bedroom? Are you both attracted to each other? Not just in the physical sense but as people. Maybe romance needs to be reawakened through shared activities, date nights, handholding. If neither of you have these feelings, perhaps go to a relationship counsellor, who can help navigate and make a decision on the outcome of this relationship.

Hi so sorry to hear this... I'm in the early days of a new relationship wherr I clearly want more than him and initiate most times and whilst he has so far always happily gone with it I worry I might be in your shoes in the future :( I guess communication is key really and a willingness from him to keep you happy too... maybe watch and read some things together to learn new tricks you may both enjoy x

Talking about it is key. I’m in a similar boat, and talking has done no good though, so where do you go from there? If you are not into a ‘kink’ the fact that you are not, and have told
them should be enough to put it to bed. There should be other ways to enjoy each other in a
way that doesnt make anyone uncomfortable

I can recommend Tadalafil 5mg (if he would be willing to take it). It restores your sex drive and eradicates ED. You can get it from Numan through the post. Me and DH were not having much sex and I was at my wits end. He started taking this and after a few months his sex drive was back and sex is now regular with no fear of ED. Absolute game changer.