How often if you are not married?

[whatsthesenseinsharing]

For couples who share a house or live independently but 'together'... how often are you having sex? And what age are you?

What’s your situation?

About every 2 days.

Living independently is my situation. Feeling like it's never or not enough?

How often do you see each other? Whenever I’ve been dating but living separately from somebody, sex has generally been on the cards every day we spend together.

If you feel you rarely or never have sex, what are your partner’s reasons? Was it ever more frequent?

It seems like we're just friends.. And I'm not sure that attraction is there... It was possibly twice a week?

Who is this man? How long have you been together? Your previous posts indicate that you had a baby just a few weeks ago. It’s fairly normal for a man’s libido to die down during pregnancy when many men are either squeamish about the idea or worried they’ll hurt the baby. And with a newborn baby close by who could wake up at any moment, the idea of sex can be a bit off-putting for a lot of people, male and female. Are you still affectionate with each other?

Baby is a wee bit older. It seems like we aren't affectionate. We had a terrible time during the pregnancy, we drifted apart. Still raising a child now and yes, having a baby does bring all the 'feels. No-one has played on them yet. He says his libido isn't what it used to be now he's 40+ but I feel mine has went up. To define us we are conscious coupling with a child to raise... if that makes sense. Maybe at the heart of all this I'm worried he doesn't find me attractive. That would hurt me, and I would feel rejected. He is allowed to feel this way. I'd rather he was honest about it I guess

Been together for nearly 3 years

There are clearly a lot of problems in your “relationship.” According to your previous posts you had your baby with this man in late September / early October. You don’t live together. He appears to resent your older children from previous relationships. You’ve just described things as being terrible during the pregnancy. Frequency of sex aside - the recent lack of which could be explained by pregnancy and having a newborn - what do you actually get from this “relationship”? The sex and whether or not he finds you attractive seem to be only one aspect of an entirely dysfunctional couple who don’t communicate well and are just sticking-plastered together by a new baby. You need to do some serious talking with him. If both of you are determined to stay together, you also need some kind of couples counselling.