Sexting to reality confidence wobble

[Shitsandwiches]

I met a guy last week in the pub - I was out with my friend and we ended up hooking up with this guy and his friend. Had a good night watching the rugby and then I ended up snogging him...alot, and giving him my number. He was really full on and into me which was as intoxicating as the vat of wine I'd drunk! We started occasional texting which has now become hot and steamy sexting and omg - I think he's going to be my first sexual encounter in 6 years.

BUT i'm 47. He's 31. We haven't talked about our ages and I don't want to. He referred to me as a hot sexy girl in one of our texting sessions and I just thought oh dear, hardly!! The sexting has been insane but I'm thinking I'm going to be a disappointment with my stretchmarked stomach and cellulite - i've spent years being a safe hermit after my divorce I know I need to get out there, but I'm nervous!! Any confidence tips or even sex tips as I had a shit marriage and then nothing so I'm a novice! Thank you :)

Thank you @DixonD !! my nerves almost got the better of me but starting this thread and getting great advice really helped me pull myself together and get out there!

Well Done! In a mixed up world like we have it is wonderful to hear about some positive experiences for a change. Go for it!

Life is short so have a good time!

I know the feeling OP. I'm 45, my boyfriend is 29. He sends me great photos of himself (not necessarily naughty, just of him) and I sometimes think I just don't look good enough for someone his age to send him a photo. I'm fine when I'm dating guys my own age, but can't help but feel older around him. But we've been dating for a couple of months, and he does find me really sexy, I just have to believe in myself a bit more

This has been a lovely thread to read.

I am recently divorced after a 20 year relationship having only had sex with the same man all my life (and it wasn't great either, I genuinely could live without it from what I've had before)
But I started to meet up with someone, only a few dates so far, but he's 29 and I'm 37. Hes slender and goes to the gym and I'm curvy, with a super flobby tummy.
I'm already worrying myself of what might be to come as I am not confident really. And my most concerns are my tummy flab and my pubic hair (which seems silly)
My tummy totally overhangs and I cover it with floaty dresses.
I have sensitive skin which means rashes if I shave or use hair removal so am trying waxing but that's hit and miss for reactions.
Just feel he will be so turned off by what is under the clothes.

Good to hear the positive update @Shitsandwiches. After such a long time was understandable. You will find more activity will get you back in there, which sounds like it has already

Well done OP! You got me envious of the three hours of good fucking! So glad it worked out for you both.

oh goodness everyone, we have agreed to meet next Saturday eek. So last time I was like, light's off please, and he joked that he couldn't see the bed, oh how we laughed....

I've steeled myself and and am thinking this time I'm going to just grit my teeth and bear it (bare it?)

Having sex with a younger man was....well, let's put it this way, he had stamina and could just keep going. Finished, 10 minutes rest, ready to go again, to the point I said I just can't go anymore. Not experienced that before.

We've had a sexting session this week again - no pictures. BUT as a pp said, I'm well aware I'm older and I don't want to talk age with him. He could never be a relationship for me, I don't feel an emotional connection per se, and he seems to be ok with this just being a bit of fun. I feel like a fraud...

Hey Floating

If he's into you, then he's into you and he's interested. As hard as that is to believe and I don't believe it myself where I'm concerned.
I said I wanted to keep the lights off because I had body hang ups.....even after all the confidence boosting posts on here, I was uncomfortable, I felt like I was hiding a horrible secret that I have been carrying for all these years and it was about to be exposed in the most vulnerable of ways. He just said 'don't be silly!'...and I thought, ok , well you have no idea how psychologically damaged I am as a woman who is a lot older than you and has just resurfaced in life after years of wasted, unfulfilling youth. Lights off!!

You sound gorgeous by the way :) One life, live it (prompts to myself as well as to you! xxx

Glad I've found this thread I'm in similar circumstances as was in a relationship for over 25 years and only been with him.
I have now met a new man. my new man is older than me actually but I'm still so bloody self conscious and sooo nervous about getting naked with him. I am slim but I'm very flat chested which I've always hidden with 2 times bigger bras etc so he'll discover they're not as big as he expects them to be! keeping the lights off won't help as he'll still feel there's not much there. why do us women have these hang ups I bet men don't have the same body hang ups ive never known a man to be self conscious about getting naked.

You'd be surprised!

@Shitsandwiches yes, I definitely think we just need to go with it.
I think I worry that he'll think awful things about how I look naked or how I perform etc. But in reality, he doesn't know any of my friends, he doesn't live in my town, so even if he did have a giggle with his mates I wouldn't know about it.

Well done for getting back out there. Surely that in itself is a huge step, and a massive confidence boost that you've met someone who you want to have sex with. I would say to try not to think about yourself in a negative way, because it can lead to us letting others talk about us in this way too.
There have been similar threads over the years & so many men on here have said confidence & enthusiasm is so sexy, and it totally overrides anything else. Keep any insecurities or body hang ups safely tucked away, and try to stay in the moment & have a bloody good time!

If you’re flat-chested, how do you wear bras two sizes bigger? Do you mean with padding? I honestly wouldn’t worry, most men adore women’s bodies regardless of bodily hang ups and I have no doubt men also have body hang ups too.

@QueenVixen yes padded they're called 2 sizes bigger bras giving your bust the appearance of being 2 sizes bigger than they actually are.

Sympathies to @whatrthechances at school I was the titless wonder. Of course it was an all girls school!!
When his mouth meets your nipples, your problems are over.

@Janinejones yep I endured all the nicknames too! bloody awful isn't it. I've spent my life waiting and wishing them to grow a bit bigger but they never bloody have! I've never been brave enough to have a boob job. wish I would have though now. 😕

I have PCOS meaning growing up a lot of body hair but over time I’ve come to accept that and I actually feel more womanly for it, it’s sexy and natural. I also have mum tum and not the best of bottoms, but again it’s all natural and normal and that’s what’s best of all

@whatrthechances , Didn't bother me much, especially as I did sport. Some girls just can't strap the Ds up tight enough for running. 😃
Didn't seem to affect babies either. Always enough.

Oh @Shitsandwiches if you are still out there thank you for this thread. That bit about not being able to see the bed made me laugh out loud. I know this is an old post but I do hope it all went well. Xxx

haha, hey @Themodeltho I'm glad I made you laugh, because I think laughter has really helped me in the fear of getting myself out there.

So, I parked it with this guy - we'd had a couple of hotel rendez vous's which were fun, but then he had a 'free house' omg! Because of course he lived with his mum, and I got the major ick! Then another came on the scene who was just plain weird and displayed all the tactics of control that I was just, no! And now I'm off tomorrow for a weekend with a guy who I would have thought would never have been my type (tattooed, big, ex-army), but he is mature, respectful, interesting.....I might actually cum with this one! :D

thank you for the update! You sound totally base and I hope everything works out for you. You deserve someone who delivers.

good luck chasing orgasms x

No cumming yet - due probably to alcohol on the night and then no real deep emotional connection in the morning, which I've realised is what orgasms are all about for me. So, I haven't had one with a man for years.

I'll keep trying though!

Can relate