Bizarre kink | Mumsnet

OctoberWoodSmell · 2023-10-16T18:38:26+00:00

I’ve got a bit of a weird fetish/kink that I’ve never explored and have been a bit ashamed by, no it’s not something illegal or anything, it’s just a bit more ‘out there’. Never told ex DH as I have a fear I’ll be judged. Is there somewhere I can go to explain it without being judged? I guess like a confession booth lol

HowDoISaveAUsername · 16/10/2023 20:00

Feel free to PM it to me as I'm a good listener who doesn't judge but will be interested in what makes you feel ashamed by it.

Thisismysexforumname · 16/10/2023 20:44

Use this board as your confession booth. I guarantee someone on here will have some experience of it.

Mermaidparades · 16/10/2023 21:56

Or will want to try it too….

Original poster

OctoberWoodSmell · 16/10/2023 22:01

I’ve had a few people PM me about it and whilst I do appreciate wanting to help I am a bit concerned people are looking to ‘get off’ from me talking about it

OP posts:

PinotPony · 16/10/2023 22:04

Well if you won't talk about it, we can't help you 🤷‍♀️

Mermaidparades · 16/10/2023 22:07

i think the short answer is you can’t possibly tell people’s motivation on an anonymous forum. Maybe a sexual counsellor would be more appropriate?

FlagFatigue · 16/10/2023 22:16

OctoberWoodSmell · 16/10/2023 22:01

I’ve had a few people PM me about it and whilst I do appreciate wanting to help I am a bit concerned people are looking to ‘get off’ from me talking about it

Report them. The rule is no PMs without checking they're wanted first.

You're right to be concerned about pervs, this topic is full of them. There was a bloke who admitted to using mumsnet to wank to not so long ago, a few that have been caught pretending to share accounts when they've been caught out pretending to be women, those with an unhealthy interest in children, those that fetishise periods. I won't go on as I have covid and already feel a bit queasy.

CatMattress · 17/10/2023 10:15

well it's here, reddit or a therapist. Forums are at least anonymous.

FordAnglia · 17/10/2023 10:31

FlagFatigue · 16/10/2023 22:16

Report them. The rule is no PMs without checking they're wanted first.

You're right to be concerned about pervs, this topic is full of them. There was a bloke who admitted to using mumsnet to wank to not so long ago, a few that have been caught pretending to share accounts when they've been caught out pretending to be women, those with an unhealthy interest in children, those that fetishise periods. I won't go on as I have covid and already feel a bit queasy.

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>>Report them. The rule is no PMs without checking they're wanted first.

side issue - how would one check that PMs are OK without first sending one first to person thinking of sending them to? Have long been puzzled by this?

FordAnglia · 17/10/2023 10:35

OctoberWoodSmell · 16/10/2023 22:01

I’ve had a few people PM me about it and whilst I do appreciate wanting to help I am a bit concerned people are looking to ‘get off’ from me talking about it

well you describe it as a kink so presumably you get off on it? so logically seems you are placing a higher burden of behaviour on others. You wouldn't be in a position to police whoever. I think I would get in touch with a counsellor - as already advised I think,

Thisismysexforumname · 17/10/2023 10:37

FordAnglia · 17/10/2023 10:31

>>Report them. The rule is no PMs without checking they're wanted first.

side issue - how would one check that PMs are OK without first sending one first to person thinking of sending them to? Have long been puzzled by this?

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General etiquette would usually to ask on the thread if a PM might be sent - this often happens routinely on non-sex chat threads although I have received PMs as a result of posts on other topics without being asked but they were relevant to the thread, but unfortunately some on here take it up themselves to PM anyway. Basically, if in doubt don't do it!

FordAnglia · 17/10/2023 10:46

Thisismysexforumname · 17/10/2023 10:37

General etiquette would usually to ask on the thread if a PM might be sent - this often happens routinely on non-sex chat threads although I have received PMs as a result of posts on other topics without being asked but they were relevant to the thread, but unfortunately some on here take it up themselves to PM anyway. Basically, if in doubt don't do it!

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side issue again (PM may avoid thread divert but obvs not on :) ) - i once had a post deleted and that could only have been because I said folks could PM if they wanted/had questions. The whole thing is beyond me am afraid - don't know why they don't just remove the PM button altogether.

Thisismysexforumname · 17/10/2023 11:48

PMs can be useful, but they are often abused with regards to the sex chat forum. I suppose it would depend why you were asking people to PM you?

AdventuresWithDogs · 17/10/2023 13:05

side issue - how would one check that PMs are OK without first sending one first to person thinking of sending them to? Have long been puzzled by this?

I see this has now been answered but I'm more puzzled that you couldn't work it out for yourself.

side issue again (PM may avoid thread divert but obvs not on :) ) - i once had a post deleted and that could only have been because I said folks could PM if they wanted/had questions. The whole thing is beyond me am afraid - don't know why they don't just remove the PM button altogether.

To have a post deleted you broke mumsnets guidelines in some way. Ask them, they'll tell you, instead of pretending it's difficult. 🙄

Why should other users not be able to PM each other, when they are capable of understanding that the etiquette is to check before sending, just because some pervs on the sex board can't act like decent humans? Ban the pervs who can't follow the rules and keep the PM function.

lilkitten · 17/10/2023 21:26

I would say here, or join Fetlife and see how many others are into your kink. It may not be as out there as you think. I mean, I love being perforated with spiked implements, particularly on my feet (so I can combine it with that kink), and my DH loves to have pegs on his cock and balls and then to have fingernails dug into his cock while I bite it. Here is pretty anonymous if you would like to share 😊

TheShellBeach · 18/10/2023 11:54

OctoberWoodSmell · 16/10/2023 22:01

I’ve had a few people PM me about it and whilst I do appreciate wanting to help I am a bit concerned people are looking to ‘get off’ from me talking about it

You should report unsolicited PMs.

Anotherlurkingmale · 18/10/2023 15:08

To the OP, would recommend posting in the LoveHoney forum, lots of kinky folk over there, so you won't get judged (bet your kink is tamer than most there) and perhaps most importantly there's no pms on that forum either.

Good luck!

Original poster

OctoberWoodSmell · 18/10/2023 15:14

Thanks all, I think I’ve decided that the therapy route is best perhaps. It’s a kink I would like to explore but again I do have a lot of shame around it and even though this is anonymous it’s just hard to talk to someone.(and its not got anything to do with my name 😅)

As for people sending my PM’s, some have been friendly and have also apologised which is nice, it’s not that I doubted you, it’s just hard for me to say. However there’s still been a couple clearly wanting something via introducing themselves and giving physical descriptions. Please don’t do that

OP posts:

TheShellBeach · 18/10/2023 15:44

OctoberWoodSmell · 18/10/2023 15:14

Thanks all, I think I’ve decided that the therapy route is best perhaps. It’s a kink I would like to explore but again I do have a lot of shame around it and even though this is anonymous it’s just hard to talk to someone.(and its not got anything to do with my name 😅)

As for people sending my PM’s, some have been friendly and have also apologised which is nice, it’s not that I doubted you, it’s just hard for me to say. However there’s still been a couple clearly wanting something via introducing themselves and giving physical descriptions. Please don’t do that

Did you report them to MNHQ?

Original poster

OctoberWoodSmell · 18/10/2023 16:02

TheShellBeach · 18/10/2023 15:44

Did you report them to MNHQ?

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One yes

OP posts:

FlagFatigue · 18/10/2023 16:39

Reporting unasked-for posts to mumsnet is really helpful as it allows mumsnet to identify who the problem posters are. If mumsnet delete these people's accounts, it means they're not doing the same to other posters.

Good luck with the therapy.

chocolateonmyface · 01/01/2024 12:05

Did the therapy help?